Category Archives: 22

22

Being Grateful

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gratitude-logoOne of the simple things in life that we all know we should practice gratitude for the things we have in our lives that bring happiness.

It is easy to look at the struggles and challenges of life and forget to see all of the things that make each day a positive experience. One of the best practices is setting aside a time of day to look at the past day and decide what you are grateful for.

Build Your Mindset

MindsetIt is a great time to build your mindset of appreciation for whatever makes your life a little better. It is my practice to write ten things a day that I appreciate, and I try to make 2 or 3 new or original. This practice gets your mind looking for ideas that you might add to the list throughout the day. Seeking gratitude improves your focus to include good thoughts and moves you away from negative thinking and worry.

Open the Door for More

Being grateful and appreciating the positive things in your life opens the door for more of those things to come into your life. A gratitude journal is a reflective moment that will only make you happier and make you feel better about life and the things you experience in it.

Open-the-door-to-moreThe other choice is to complain about everything you don’t like about your experience. That only puts your focus more on those negative things, and of course, more of those things will come into your life. Nobody cares about your complaints; they are your issues. At best, anyone you are complaining to is just looking for an opportunity to share their grievances about why they are unhappy.

Like most things, it comes down to a simple choice that anyone can make. You don’t have to be intellectually superior to be grateful, but you must be smart. It will make your life better and bring more of what you want into your consciousness.

The Power of Thank You

hqdefaultThere is a lot of power in using the words Thank You! It has been clinically proven that if you thank a new acquaintance for anything they do, it makes them more likely to seek to further your relationship. Gratitude makes you physically and mentally healthier, enhances empathy, reduces aggression, improves the quality of your sleep, improves self-esteem, and makes you think more efficiently.

Best of all, there is no downside to the practice at all. Have you ever heard of someone being harmed by being grateful and saying a simple thank you? Of course not. Those two little words make others feel appreciated and open the doorway for more positive creation in your life.

Appreciation Game

A high activity that I read about is the Appreciation Game. When you are feeling angry, upset, or just in a negative mindset, it is because of the thoughts you are choosing to entertain. Our minds are fantastic tools, but they are only tools to be used by us. They are capable of thinking one thought at a time, and you decide the content, tenor, and tone of that thought. So you choose to find things in your life that you appreciate and think about. I understand the weather. I enjoyed my coffee today. It makes life better. I appreciate my spouse. I know the kind thing my kids did. I appreciate my health. I appreciate having money. I appreciate my success. I appreciate my life, etc. It will flip your mindset to the positive side if you let it.

Of course, you can choose to stay mired in the negative for whatever reason you want. Anger, jealousy, and judgment are just different masks of fear. These have something to do with not meeting your needs and some pain coming your way.

The choice is yours, live in fear, or live in gratitude.

“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” —Gilbert K. Chesterton

“Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.” —Zig Ziglar

“Learn to be thankful for what you already have while you pursue all that you want.” —Jim Rohn

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” —Oprah Winfrey

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” —William Arthur Ward

 

22

Forgive Them Anyway

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Those we think the most of can be the most difficult to forgive, BUT we must forgive to move forward at last.
`Those we think the most are often the most difficult to forgive, BUT we must forgive to move forward at last.

Forgiveness has been a difficult thing for me at times. Realizing learning to forgive is one of the most important lessons a person can learn. I am continually analyzing why I have difficulty letting some things go and moving forward with life in a more positive way.

For most people who I carried low expectations, forgiveness comes more naturally. We are all learning life lessons when someone I expect more from fails me. I find it extremely difficult to forgive.

The things that other people do or have done hurt you and cause you to experience fear in your life. Fear that you will be harmed in some way or don’t measure up, or worry about what others might think of us. Part of the human condition is to experience pain; it teaches lessons and pushes us in directions that may not be easy to go. But there is a point where we have suffered enough and learned all we can. That is a time to forgive those we perceive to have harmed us. That is when we stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for an offense, flaw, or mistake. The act of forgiveness will bring you many benefits.

Loss of Faith

stabbed in the back
The most devastating of these come from someone you trust. You never see it coming.

You come to depend on certain people to be on your side and support you, no matter what. It is a cold lesson to find them acting differently from what you have seen over years of experience. Their hypocrisy is one of the most painful hurts because it is so unexpected, like a sucker punch from the Pope. It hurts twice and is more difficult to forgive because a deeply personal trust has been violated. Someone that you could always count on was now gone. Who or what can you trust if you can no longer trust them?

ultimate forgiveness
I forgive all and carry no grudges about anything.

Forgiveness of the ones you cared about the most is most challenging to grant, but it is essential in the end. Your heart will never fully heal until you give this forgiveness, deserved or not, because your life needs to move forward, and casting off all of the anchors of wrongdoing, actual and perceived, is a must. Forgive and move forward; all people act the way they do because of their individual needs. Those we care about are special for a reason, and even though it is hard, forgiving them is a vital step in living a happy life.

Forgiving Others

We have all had people enter our lives who seem to be there to hurt us. These people have hurt us, taken from us, or caused general suffering in our lives. That is their problem and their karma in life. When we hold onto the act that hurts us, it eats away at our present moment happiness. If you are mad at the thought of that person and what they did to you, it is time to let it go. Time to forgive the people that have hurt you and move forward.

It is difficult to forgive because, in many ways, it feels like you are condoning the behavior that caused you any suffering. That is not the case, you do not accept the inadequate response from another, but forgiveness allows you to put the pain of the situation behind you and take away its control over you. Without the emotional charge you provide, an experience becomes something you can learn from and choose some value from. If only that, it can enhance your current life. Choosing to forgive also gives you power over all people and things in your past. You determine exactly how you feel about them and the emotions you attach to them.

Forgive You

One of the most challenging people to forgive is often ourselves. In life, we are going to make mistakes and misjudgments. We are going through this human experience for the first time, and it will have lessons for you to learn. Too many times, we take the lessons personally and allow them to become a part of our identity. This thought is never the case. A mistake is a mistake. Poor judgment is poor judgment. The wisest person in the world has made hundreds of errors. The difference between you and them is that they have learned the lesson and discarded the vehicle it came in.

You are a unique human being and have nearly unlimited potential to do what you dream of if you get out of your way. The way we talk to ourselves has a lot to do with our energy and the confidence developed in life. Only allow yourself to speak of yourself in the kindest ways. Don’t let your mind entertain thoughts that are derogatory to you in any way. Forgiveness of your past mistakes will make this possible and allow you to be confident in your current actions and build the most positive future possible.

Forgive It All

Whatever it is in life you think has caused your suffering and pain, forgive it. There are going to be things that cause us pain in life. Recognize that most of the pain we have allowed has been self-inflicted. Either we have had expectations of too rigid things, leaving a significant gap between what we expect to happen and reality. All of these gaps are going to be painful things. Forgive the situations and recognize that how we choose to think is the cause of much of our suffering. Changing how we feel about things is something all people can do at this very moment, and changing the way you think about an event will change the emotional attachment you have to it. Freedom from all of your past emotional messes is waiting for you with the simple act of heartfelt forgiveness. There is a power in forgiveness that will enliven your soul. 

“Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.” Desmond Tutu

“There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.” Bryant H. McGill

“When you forgive, you in no way change the past – but you sure do change the future.” Bernard Meltzer

“Mistakes are always forgivable if one dares to admit them.”  Bruce Lee

Time to sail on to the future.

Related articles across the web

 

22

What is Your Intention?

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Daily Intention- a thing intended, an aim or plan.

All that we have ever done or ever will do has begun with the creation of an intention in our mind. Someone has set a resolution to do or accomplish something and then taken action to make that thing come into reality. Without the initial power of intention, there is no way that someone can get started on a path at all. This fact is actual, from a significant change in career to building a relationship or inventing some new process, substance, or product. It all starts with the intention to do it. What plans are you setting today? Focus on your purposes in your thoughts, words, and actions today.

Short-Term Intentions

Each day, we can create almost anything we want from the clean slate of a new morning. Set an intention to be happy, be productive, or be a good person on this day. The opportunity will present itself to you to follow your intention, and all one has to do is follow its purpose to its successful conclusion. Without an intention in your day, it isn’t easy to get outside of yourself.

In the early of your morning, take a moment, and think about the intent you want to bring to your day. Most people don’t have a conscious intention to be negative, judgmental, or unkind, but without a definite purpose, these things happen. Set a choice in your day to be a positive influence in all things you do, and then take action toward that end. Each day we have the chance to do so.

Long-Term Intentions

Of course, most people have long-term goals and dreams they are trying to pursue and create. That is what gives life its juice. You may not know precisely how this will happen for you, but you are set in your mind about creating it. It could be a career goal or some other achievement. Set your intention and let it dominate your thoughts. Thoughts will lead to words and actions. Something will happen once you start taking action, moving you closer to your goal.

Whether you reach your aim or not has to do with many factors, you may not be able to control—the ability to accept failure. Sometimes we need to learn things, and we do not naturally know everything. Failure is not a permanent predicament. But a valuable learning experience that provides you with the knowledge you need to accomplish the things you set your intention to do. Never be too discouraged, plan draws energy, and that energy is for building what you want. All you have to do is know what you want and be strong enough to do what you need to do to stick with it until you find your intention as a reality in your life.

 

Set Intentions Right Now

Setting your intentions is essential because it gives your life direction and purpose. These are two critical things to be engaged in and enjoy the journey. A goal will keep life exciting and provide you with something to work toward achieving. Always have a meaning until life is over. Keep your direction in mind because your actions will take you down one road or another. Please make sure they are the roads that you want to travel down.

Set your intention today for the great things you can accomplish in the next 24 hours and for something you can achieve in your life. See where they lead you. Today, be kind, considerate, compassionate, understanding, loving, generous, compassionate, understanding, loving, and generous. Be aware of what your intentions are today in your thoughts, words, and actions!! It will define your life.

“Our intention creates our reality.” – Wayne Dyer

“It is the intent which establishes one’s consequential outcomes.”-T.F. Hodge

“We know there is intention and purpose in the universe because there are intentions and purpose in us.”- George Bernard Shaw

22

The Enemy

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Enemy- an actively opposed or hostile to someone or something.

We all have had the experience of being opposed by someone. Jealousy, envy, anger, or greed usually are behind these feelings. In the world, enemies, real and perceived, are used to perpetuate fear and manipulate support for a specific policy or action. What would the world be like if we did away with the idea of enemies altogether? Of course, we will never know, but we can find out what your life would be without them. Enemies exist because we choose to allow them. Eliminating your enemies starts with you looking closely at your thoughts, words, and actions when dealing with others. Your perception is the key. How you see others is often how we view ourselves.

We are the same as our enemies.

One of the paradoxes of life is that each person is unique and one of a kind, but we all, at our core, are the same. So we may have different skin shades, and our eyes are different colors as well. Our height is never uniform. There are many differences, but we all are the same and come from the same source of life. If we all realized this, there would be fewer problems in the world. This may be unrealistic for the masses but not for the individual.

If you view another as your enemy, you look at them with negativity. They may say something terrible about you. They may try to hurt you. Whatever your “enemies” do, don’t resort to responses to cut them back. Forgive those who try to harm you, learn from them, and move on from them. Learn to practice your defense and avoid going on the offense at all costs. If you view them as an enemy, how do they see you? We are all the same, competing for perceived gains with no real value. But they cost us everything. In the value we see in ourselves, we can provide for the world.

Change your Perception of Enemies

Again it is easy to categorize people and label them as one thing or another because it makes you more comfortable with yourself. Change your perception of them and spend your time looking for yourself in each person you meet. There is always common ground, and you will see yourself in all others. This vision will happen when you stop looking at people as enemies and start viewing them as they are.

All people are teachers, and they will teach you valuable lessons. The very least of which might be how not to act or treat others. Pay attention, learn the lesson, forgive them if need be, and move on with your life. Any time spent aimed at revenge or punishment only limits what positive action you can take in the world. Anger leads to sudden blows that might make you feel powerful for a moment but, in the end, result in wasted energy. When the clock runs out on your life, is that what you will think of?

Sometimes You have to Fight.

I know that I may have to fight for protection or to maintain a principle in life. But I struggle to persevere, not to conquer another. If a person sees no enemy, there is no hate and hope for a better world. Violence is not the answer, and it only leads to more destruction. This relationship is demonstrated all over the world, all the time. One violent act is used to justify another, then another. Pain and death are the results, and there are no positives—only suffering.

If you see no enemies, only people, your actions will not fly out of anger, hate, or revenge. Then you can act out of strength, understanding, and compassion for others. Who are at their core precisely like you? Learn from all people, respect their capabilities, and in understanding lies the path to resolution.

Look at the conflicts in your life. Evaluate how you perceive those involved. Are they your enemies? Are they your teachers? Are they just like you? Are they all of these things? What actions can you take to lead to a resolution to the conflict that is honorable for yourself and all involved? Focus on leaving the world a better place than when this “enemy” came into your life. It all starts, as it always does, focusing on your thoughts, words, and actions. Raise your consciousness about the activities of your enemies, and you will see a better version of yourself. Your real enemy is created in your mind. Never let him control you.

“The old perception of conflict as combat only narrows our vision, limits our choices, pulls us into endless struggles between competing polarities.” ~Diane Dreher

“But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless those that curse you, do good to those that hate you, and pray for those who speak evil about you, and persecute you.”~ Jesus Christ

 

22

These Masks

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Masks of Life

Masks are used to hide a true identity. What does yours hide?
Masks are used to hide a real identity. What does yours hide?

It doesn’t matter who you are, where you live, or how much you have. You have spent a significant part of your life creating and wearing masks to hide your true identity. Authentic masks have become convenient in protecting our true identity in social situations. They bring us power, acceptance, or even can allow us to survive. Unfortunately, once used, they become pretty permanent.

These masks come in all varieties, shapes, and sizes and, in many cases, serve you quite well. They help to project the image that you want. But still, inside of us, there is a real person who is slowly suffocated by the masks we have chosen to wear.

Why I Built Masks

Hiding my true self, was for protection. It became almost permanent.
Hiding my true self was for protection. It became almost permanent.

As early as I can remember, there are many memories of support, recognition of who I was, and an appreciation for what I brought to the world. Then it started to change; other people did not seem to accept me as my loved ones did.

It is one of nature’s oldest forms of protection, camouflage. We feel safe by disguising the attributes that we take criticism for, causing us to experience pain. I think we feel protected, but it is false protection at a considerable price.

Although I was still the friendly, caring kid I was, I started to put on a mask that would help me get through the rough seas of acceptance that childhood makes you travel. It worked! I could hide and be whatever was more acceptable, funnier, meaner, less accepting of others—even narrow-minded and worse, unkind, insensitive, and even cruel.

Careful It May Get Stuck

The masks I constructed to get through the pains of growing up were helpful. It would be

Careful, they may become hard to get rid off.
Careful, they may become hard to get rid of.

insane to claim anything else. However, there is a problem we never think of at first. The masks we build become less of a cover and more of a permanent fixture. I began to forget who I was.

Since I wore the mask I wore, that became the dominant feature of my personality. I assume that actors sometimes have difficulty separating themselves from their characters. My life slowly yet inevitably became a permanent production of the mask that now was seemingly stuck in my existence.

The Real Tragedy

Don't Forget Who You Are.
Don’t Forget Who You Are.

After a while, we have forgotten all about who we were in the past and the essence that we were born with that made us great in the first place. Sometimes events have forced us to wear the mask for protection, and the events which cause this frighten us so much that we feel we need them forever.

Then as life passes and we realize that something isn’t right, we see that the mask we are wearing has made it almost impossible to remember anything about who we are. We don’t think we could recognize ourselves, even if we saw our true selves. That loss of identity is the real tragedy of the mask.

Losing your Mask

Like anything built sturdily and over time, you are getting rid of your mask is not something you can do in a day, a week, or sometimes even a year. Yet it is not complicated, and anyone can do it.

The trick to getting rid of your mask is remembering who you are and learning to accept it and love that person. The negative voices that fill your head with gibberish need to be expelled. All past bad experiences need to be forgiven, and you need to forgive yourself. Pay attention to the positive thoughts and feelings that surround being yourself.

The biggest fear of someone who wears a mask is that someone else will see through it and reject or be horrified by what they see. That can’t be the case because we are born with a unique person inside that is the essence of greatness. If someone sees something other than that, they are looking in a mirror, understanding their problems, not yours.

“We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin.” – André Berthiaume

“Nothing is more real than the masks we make to show each other who we are.” – Christopher Barzak

“Like icebergs, people normally expose only a small part of themselves, and generally just the part they wish to show.” – Nikki

“People seldom change. Only their masks do. It is only our perception of them and the perception they have of themselves that actually change.” – Shannon L. Alder

 

22

Magic Words

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Word- something that someone says or writes, a remark or piece of information.

wordOne of the three things I think you have to focus on to raise your level of consciousness is the words you use every day. Word use is essential to your actions and the feelings, thoughts, and steps you create in others and yourself. How you speak can make someone more confident and empowered, or it can quickly destroy someone’s confidence and abilities.

The choice of your words can also dictate the life you grow, either positive or negative. Today I am putting your focus on each word you use today. Is it helpful? Is it harmful? What exactly is the purpose of this thought? It all begins with looking at your thoughts,  which lead to your words, leading to feelings and actions in your life.   Most importantly, let’s look at the words you use every day.

The Words are Magic

Just for a day, focus on the words you use. Why do you say things the way that you do? There is a reason you speak to someone the way you do. Is there a trust or a distrust of this person?   Words are how we either clearly or not so clearly let the world understand our thoughts. That wordcan be a scary proposition for some people. Comments can be helpful, but they can be extremely harmful as well. A relationship can be destroyed, trust can be ruined, or someone can be saved through the words we use. Trust can be built when our terms are backed up with decisive action.

The point of focusing on your words is to make sure that you are the force in the world you intend to be. A person has an equal ability to be a positive force in the lives of others or to harm them with negativity. This choice all happens through the use of their words. Be complimentary, supportive, and kind in your terms, and their influence will propel people forward to being their best. But most importantly, your words will drive you toward being your best. Focus on your words and the thoughts and feelings behind them. Are they planting the seeds you want to see grow in the future?

Avoid the Negative

Our words can cause people pain. There are countless examples in every life on Earth of this being the case. Gossip is one way this happens, which is the mindless chatter of small minds. It can be hard to stop yourself from participating in gossip. This practice is foolish talk about others which most often are not based on fact. Even if it is true, it doesn’t do you any positive good to do this.

Words can be loving or feel like a punch in the face.

Words are used by all people with the capacity for speech, and there is little to no conscious thought associated with their use. We speak to express ourselves to others and rarely contemplate the message we are sending. There is power in your words, which exists in all verbal communication. Pay attention to the power of your words. These words can change our lives and the lives of those we take the time to speak with daily. What you choose to talk about grows. 

Our Thoughts Expressed

What is a word but a way to express your thoughts to the Universe? All words have power. Positive words can nurture a relationship, create peace, build a community, inspire great action, or create justice. Words of love, prosperity, and gratitude will bring those things into your life. Conversely, if your words are spent on gossip, hate, judgment, or jealousy, they will bring those things into your life. When you plant these positive words day to day, then the crop you reap will be a pretty positive one.

And so are you!
And so are you!

This is simple enough to test. Be aware of the words you are using and focus on really speaking words of love, prosperity, and gratitude for a week and see what grows from it. If that is too daunting a task, do it for just a day. The trick will be to stop yourself from speaking words on the negative side and sticking to the positive. I am always surprised by how tempting it is to say the words that don’t help anything or anybody, the gossip that provides a connection—the “harmless”  joke at someone else’s expense. Watch your words and see what happens. If you can, you will see a positive difference in your life. Those who continually gossip and judge others will bring negativity into your life, and it will become apparent when this is happening.

What you seek, you will find

This works so well because once you start to seek positive words and situations that be carefurequire positive comments, you become more aware of these situations in all areas of your life. When you deal with all people, tell them what they do well, explain why they are valued, and how your experience is better because of them in your life.

When you are looking for things to express positive feelings about, you can’t help but find items worthy of your positive thoughts and words. More than likely, these things have been there all along, unnoticed. But it is a conscious choice to look for them that reveals them to you and allows you to use your words to speak of them. It isn’t easy to make things happen if you don’t speak. 

Use your words to allow for the growth of love, kindness, peace, acceptance, and understanding in the world and your life. It takes just a little effort to have the consciousness of your words expressing the positive expressions of your thoughts. It all begins with paying attention to those thoughts, the resulting feelings, the words that follow, and your actions because of the great good you can accomplish with them.

“Be mindful when it comes to your words. A string of some that don’t mean much to you may stick with someone else for a lifetime.” -Rachel Wolchin

“Words are free. It’s how you use them that may cost you.” –Kushand Wizdom

“One kind word can change someone’s entire day.” -Unknown

 

22

Expand Your Mind

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How much time do you spend consciously expanding your mind?

Our constant companion is our mind. It continually spills a non-stop stream of words into your reality that only you can hear inside your head. No matter what is happening, your mind has something to say about it. As you get older, I think either you succumb to the fact, this is the way it will be. Or you actively start to understand how this tool of a mind works and see if you can make the relationship between you much more positive and productive. The natural flow of thoughts is not very positive or helpful to anyone’s life. To change this, you have to take some action and gain some understanding. Here are some things I have learned and observed.

We Don’t Create Our Thoughts

You would think the one thing in the world you control would be the thoughts in your mind, but in reality, we don’t control very many of them. They come from our conditioning, projecting our biases and beliefs into our lives. It doesn’t matter if you want them or not. There is a constant, natural stream of thoughts conversing in your mind. You are not the creator of these thoughts; you are the listener and observer of these ideas. So who is thinking? That is a conversation for another day, but suffice it to say, it is not you and your conscious self. You are free to listen or not. That is your decision.

To even notice them takes a little effort. You have to be conscious of them appearing. Remember, your mind, left to itself, will comment on everything that happens, from that car you see driving past to the people you see in your day-to-day interactions. Usually, it is neither positive nor friendly. The good news is, these thoughts are not you, and you can dismiss them with a little bit of conscious effort. We will discuss this at the end.

Why are we are so negative and set in our thoughts?

There are two natural biases we all carry that answer this question. First, there is a negativity bias we all have. We are more likely to focus on possible adverse outcomes to protect ourselves. If you expect the worst, you can never be disappointed. So our thoughts tend to reflect this bias. We see the hurricane that might come and the damage it will do. We

What are your thoughts focused on?

Experience these things as if they have happened and that stress is real to us. Of course, if that hurricane should hit you and bring all the bad things you imagined, you will feel prepared, but the sad truth is you will not be—this mode of protection doesn’t work, and you can’t dream up all the bad things in the world.

You can combat this by recognizing it and dismissing the negative thoughts for what they are, unnecessary. One learns to control the ideas and limit them through meditation by quieting the mind and focusing on something else. Your breath or a mantra of some kind, you stop the mind from speaking because you are somewhere else. This includes the negative bias you perpetuate pretty naturally. It is easier to change your outlook to a more positive one when you experience a little peace from the constant stream of thought. The negative bias can be changed with conscious effort.

Why are people so narrow-minded?

Another bias we carry is confirmation bias. Meaning we will search out facts and information that seemingly confirms a previously held belief and ignore or dismiss it out of hand as wrong anything contrary to an already held belief. We are just not very open to new information in any natural way. If you have a particular political leaning, information supporting your beliefs will easily be accepted, no matter how questionable. At the same time, information that contradicts your firmly held beliefs is dismissed without question, no matter how accurate.

The close association people feel with their beliefs and thoughts make any questioning of them an attack on who they are as people. It will help if you look no further than any long, angry argument anyone has on social media. I see people I know get into meaningless arguments about politics, social issues, mask-wearing, or other beliefs. The confirmation bias makes us angrier and more defensive than we need to be and makes people attack others in words to protect their closely held identity.

I often wonder at the venom people state to each other online and hope that a little bit of conscious reflection might ease some of this suffering. Perhaps not taking an opposite opinion as a personal attack on you and your value system might be a good start. Or you can continue as you are and be mad at everyone for everything that doesn’t fall in line with what you think and believe.

Meditate and Let Go

The simple way to get to know your thoughts and recognize your biases is to start to watch your thoughts, and meditation is the way to do that. It isn’t challenging to do, and many great apps can guide you. I use one called Insight Timer, which works for me, but there are several good ones I have tried. Calm and Headspace are two of those. Meditation allows you to handle all of those thoughts and decide which ones represent you and which ones don’t also enable you to understand yourself and why certain emotions and thoughts come up when they do. What is bothering you, and what types of events in your past are still harming you. You have to let it all go to move forward with life, and meditation allows you the chance to do this.

“Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”

“Great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.” —”William James

“Clear thinking requires courage rather than intelligence.” —”Thomas Szasz

“Did you ever stop to think and forget to start again?” —”Winnie the Pooh

“Few minds wear out; more rust out.—”Christian N. Bovee

“It is well for people who think, to change their minds occasionally to keep them clean.” —”Luther Burbank

“Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.” —Benjamin Lee Whorf

“Misery is almost always the result of thinking.” —”Joseph Joubert

“Most of the mistakes in thinking are inadequacies of perception rather than mistakes of logic.” —Edward de Bono

“Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

“What we think, we become.” —Buddha

 

22

True Or False

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There are two parts of our identity, our soul or true self, given to us at birth. It’s the true person we are and the one we are always looking to get back to in life.

The other part of our identity is our ego or false self. This mistaken idea is the person we are programmed to become. We are taught these beliefs from our parents, family members, teachers, peers, and societal influences. The false self, or what others believe we should be, takes us further from our true self.

The further we get from who we are, the more unhappy we become. But we are trapped in an illusion of ego, trying to follow a script that we did not write with our best interests in mind. Most people never consider any part of their existence in any authentic detail or depth. I challenge you to look at your thoughts and beliefs and determine if they bring you closer to your true self or further away.

Some Thoughts of the False Self

  1. Being obsessed with perfection- Many people will never accept anything but perfection. Since perfection is impossible to achieve, this pursuit causes difficulty. It causes some never to give a total effort because they can never achieve perfection. Some will cheat to appear to be perfect. Some will steal to look perfect. Whatever the resulting action, thoughts, and feelings, they will make you feel wrong about who you are.
  2. The feelings of greed, a limited mindset, and selfishness show that the fixed mindset has a stronghold on you. Getting as much as you can, as quickly as possible, is a sign you are lost in excessive desires. What you have doesn’t define who you are and never will. Fearing, you will never have enough is a limiting belief that takes the joy out of everything you have.
  3. New experiences are scary. In the best of circumstances, a unique experience will cause uncomfortable feelings. In less than ideal conditions, fear of participation can result. We all have an innate fear of rejection, humiliation, failure, getting old, and the unknown, and these all lead to resistance, avoidance, and apprehension of new experiences.
  4. They are using incomplete facts and questionable logic to justify everything you do. Because what is happening doesn’t feel”good,” people apply a created justification for what they are doing in life.

How to Find Your True Self

  1. A choice is the first thought process we all have, which will allow or destroy the ability to grow. No matter where you are in life, you can make choices to change your circumstances and have something else happen for you. If you are unhappy with your situation in life, you can choose another way. It is easy to feel trapped by circumstances, but that is a choice. There is a power in choosing your action based on what you think is right that empowers dreams and gives positive energy to your life.
  2. Faith in yourself and life, in general, will allow you the ability to seek growth. All things will work out, one way or another. Even if you can’t see how they are going to come true, pursuing your goals is one of the most potent acts of faith you can undertake. Looking at how specific actions lead to thoughts and emotions that attract or repel you. Having faith that the best of things is coming your way, even when it seems dark and far away at the moment, is a genuine act of strength. Faith that you will find your significant purpose.
  3. Seeking growth opportunities in your life. Dismiss the idea that you have to be perfect in every way because it is an unreachable standard. If you approach all things as if you can master them with a bit of practice and dedication, you will be able to do just that. Having natural ability is helpful, but those who work to improve will always benefit the most and, in the long run, be able to handle challenges and setbacks. There is a strength we develop about this time. Shift your focus from, I know everything! To I can learn anything.
  4. Surrender to what is. This is the movement of the soul. Resistance is the voice of the ego. The former pulls you closer to your true self, and the latter pushes you further away. Fear is the ego’s tool, but surrender does not mean you accept poor treatment or behavior from another. You recognize it for what it is, which will dictate your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Most often, to accept a situation means you can leave a wrong place or difficult circumstances for something more positive.

It is up to each individual in the world to decide if they are going to seek their real purpose in life or follow the general script that society has programmed into them. Each person has a destiny when they enter the world, some task to accomplish, a message to leave, or some work. Our lives have meaning, and it is up to us to determine if we are following our correct path or not. You are a powerful force of destiny, but you have to start by looking for who you are and what that purpose is. Our most important journey is to leave ego and live our life from the soul.

“It’s not enough to have lived. We should be determined to live for something.” ―Winston S. Churchil

“The path to our destination is not always a straight one. We go down the wrong road, and we get lost; we turn back. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on. Maybe what matters is that we embark.” ―Barbara Hal”

“People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they are not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.” ―Dalai Lama

 

22

Stages of Life

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Cycles- a series of events that are regularly repeated in the same order.

Tunnel vision seems to be a talent people develop. Looking at the one moment or situation and only seeing what is in front of them. They understand their experiences as individual events, affecting only them in this one moment. But there is a more massive game at play as we move through your life cycle. Things are moving together at once to a conclusion we are neither in control of nor conscious of their happening.

Today the challenge is to be more aware of the cycles we are moving through in our individual experiences. It starts with looking at the thoughts you are thinking to lead to events, the words we use to describe them and ourselves, and our actions to make things happen. Life is not a snapshot. It is a video, and watch the whole thing.

Inevitable Cycles

There are some events that we are destined to go through. All things come, and they go. Life as a whole is one of these inevitable cycles. You can’t avoid it because the control lies with nature, and we are just players in this action. We are here through its production from the beginning, middle, and end, which is not negotiable. We have no idea when the end is going to come. That makes the cycle a little more exciting, but most go through the period without noticing something in arcane ignorance.

The one thing we do have control over is how we respond to the larger cycle of life. We can hide in unconscious entertainment activities, letting each move in the period pass us unnoticed and unappreciated, or notice the changes and turns in the life cycle. As the twists and turns on a rollercoaster, you can choose to prepare and enjoy the moments or hide your eyes and let them slip away. Some will be sad, of course, but most will be glorious. Don’t wallow in the tragedy. Enjoy the magnificent. Get into the cycle of life you are currently experiencing. It will not go on forever.

Some Cycles Need to be Broken

On a smaller scale, we all establish cycles in our lives. The routines run them we create to manage our lives and make them as productive and enjoyable as we can. How we prepare for the day, get to work, eat our meals, and spend our free time can all be included in our daily cycle. Sometimes these cycles bring a narrow scope of life or include bad habits, which are not suitable for our health, mentally or physically. The good part is that we can break them at any moment.

It starts with becoming aware of what your particular cycle brings into your life. Perhaps it is causing you to shut out opportunities for new adventures because it would mean a change. Maybe it is keeping unhealthy relationships and habits in your reality because they bring comfort. The person in charge of breaking a destructive cycle is you and you alone. Become conscious of the results of the cycles you are experiencing today, like old clothes that are out of style or worn out. Once, they had a purpose, but now it’s time to move on and wear something new. Break a destructive cycle and start a new one. It can happen any time you consciously choose to do so.

New Cycles

It is also interesting that we can create cycles and routines that include all of the healthy and enjoyable things life offers with a little conscious effort. When you want to do this, look for something that you know has to change or another that you want to add to your life. Then see where it fits. Exercise can be one of these things. When it moves from something that you would like to do to something that you must do, it will become a part of your life cycle.

New cycles are painful at first, but slowly they become a part of your life, and you move through them seamlessly as if they were always there. This experience happens when you change jobs or move to a new location. We seek familiarity in our routines to find ourselves in a unique situation. There is a comfort in the known that makes even the strangest place feel like home. Look for the cycles you can create that will make you feel this way.

The Endings are the Beginnings: Cycles

All cycles do end for us, eventually. Rather than be sad about the loss, be happy about the beginning that will result from it. Even the end of life brings a new start in some way. As our consciousness ends, another may be born. If left to our own devices, our bodies would return to the Earth and provide nutrients for a new life. Take a moment today and notice the cycles around you and the many endings, beginnings, and middles that exist everywhere.

It can come from enjoying a cup of coffee to appreciating a conversation. They are in everything, and by being conscious of them, you become more aware of the substance of life. One thing ends, bringing the beginning of another. The cycle of life is there for you to watch. And it all starts with you paying more attention to the thoughts you entertain, the words you speak, and the actions you take because of it. Notice your life cycles and honestly seek to make them more positive and healthy every day. The life you improve will be your own.

“Each thing is like form from everlasting and comes round again in its cycle.”~ Marcus Aurelius

“Karma, memory, and desire are just the software of the soul. It’s conditioning that the soul undergoes to create experience. And it’s a cycle. In most people, the cycle is a conditioned response. They do the same things over and over again.”~ Deepak Chopra

This, too shall pass. 

 

 

 

22

Working with Change

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Change-1. Make or become different. 2. take or use another instead of.

Change is a force that all people deal with from the moment they are born until they die. It is inevitably happening all around us. Learning to handle change constructively is one of the most valuable life skills a person can develop because it will be used continually and make your life a much more enjoyable experience. Change comes like the tide in the ocean, and you can spend your energy fighting it or be working with it. Be conscious of the difference in your life today in thoughts, words, and actions.

Opportunity for Change

It is human nature to resist change. Especially if life is going well, a person will look at difference as a thief of the good things in their lives. Even if you are unhappy with the way things are right now,  the situation is known and changed. It means it could get worse. Also though it could get better, that fear of losing what you know can be paralyzing.

The focus needs to be placed on the potential good things you can gain from a change in any situation. Since change is inevitable and consistent, resisting it and looking to the past in reverence is a waste of time and energy. All things change and develop over time, and put your conscious thought into everything you can gain from the process.

Pain and Change

To experience change can be painful. Sometimes you leave behind things you have enjoyed and people you care about. It is sad to grow sometimes, but growth is necessary to learn and become the best version of yourself possible. We are not born a finished product. Our development is evident in childhood, but it doesn’t end when you turn 18 or 25 or 35 or 75. Change continues, and one until finally, the game is over. The thoughts of change may be painful but not as painful as resisting the inevitable.

There is probably nothing as painful as clinging to a thing or place that you no longer belong to. When you stay in a situation for staying, not rocking the boat, or hoping the changes aren’t fundamental, misery will follow. What was once pleasure will become a pain. The only cure is moving forward, accepting the difference, and taking the next inevitable step. The pain exists to force you to do what you need to. So could you do it?

Growth From Change

Since change is happening all around you and to you at every moment, it would make sense to create a plan to try to benefit from this process. Rather than be an object helplessly tossed around by the waves of change, it makes sense to have a plan to deal with change and ride those waves. The waves are coming. You will change, and life will change. It is your choice to grow or not from experience.

Be conscious of the forces of change working in your life today. In your personal life, professional life, or life in general. The places you go, and the people you spend time with. Change is happening, and conscious of it in thought, word, and action allows us to move with it rather than fight against it. Recognize the variation that exists all around you and roll with it.

“The world, as we have created it, is a process of our thinking, and it cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” ― Albert Einstein.