My Advice to Me

My freshman year of college on the b-ball team. Didn't have a clue.
My freshman year of college on the b-ball team. Didn’t have a clue.

 

Hey Young Jonathan, it is time to put the toys away. Put down the beer bottle and pay attention, I have to send you a message that will change your life.  It will make you more successful, happier and in the end me.

This is a post I have often seen and wanted to do.  I have been endowed with the incredible talent to send this back in time to myself at 18 years old, I can only tell myself five things or it would be a book, not a blog.  I have gone a lot of miles in the last 29 years and I should have a lot of good advice for me.  You can be the judge of the value, I can only provide what I have.

 

YOU ARE SMART

Hey Jonathan, for much of the last five years or so, people have kindbeen telling you that you are not that intelligent.   And the worst part is that you believe them.  People are making judgments about you because you had a hard time with the system.

 

Homework is not your thing, and yes you could have tried harder, but I know that most of that time you were a walking ball of hormones and being in school was just a social occasion for you.  It didn’t mark your intelligence, that is inside you.  Start to believe in this now, college gets easier for you and by the time you are an adult, you realize how easy learning is, particularly when it is on your terms and about things you like.  You are smart, you have always known it, don’t hide who you are because it is easy!

Be Yourself

0-0-namka15Much of your life is going to be spent worrying about what others think for some reason.  It is a silly waste of time, because you will only be happy, really happy when you accept who you are and do what makes you happy.

You like to write and create, but for much of your life you will be scared to be creative.  Fear is just a thought Jonathan and you need to face the world with the love that is in your heart.  Be accepting of others and they will be accepting of you.  BE Yourself, because the one thing I have learned, that I am absolutely sure of is that the person that you are is OK.

Understand Friendship

imagesFriendship is a crazy thing.  Understand that all friendships are formed around a shared experience with someone else.  Do not hesitate to open the door to more shared experiences and more friends.  Don’t judge others too harshly because you will notice that you can only criticize in others, what you know is inside yourself.   Rather than judge, open your heart and accept all people as friends when you have the chance.

 

Understanding the nature of friendship is to realize that people will come into and fall out of your life.  Some may enter again later and some you may never see again.  When the shared experience that makes you friends is gone, most often so are the friends.  Work is a shared experience, a hobby is a shared experience and life can be.  Don’t expect too much of a friendship, because in many cases they will let you down.

 

But understand that when your eyes are open, there are new friends and experiences coming down the road.  Most often they are going to teach you just what you need to know, and help you survive the shared experience you are having right now.   Follow your nature Jonathan, make more friends, and let them move in and out of your life without judgment or expectation.

It isn’t All About YOU

Jonathan, there is one aspect of your life that I want you to change, centeroftheuniverseand that is to be less selfish.  You put yourself first in too many situations and that is no way to live.  As you only worry about yourself and what you have.  The focus of your life is your existence and eventually the only thing in your life will be you.

 

One of the secrets of life I have learned is that the more you give, the more you get.  It is a simple thing, but when you are acting self-centered you can’t see it.  Give to others freely and without expectation of reward and…………………..you are rewarded.  Life has quite a sense of humor.  This is true in relationships, jobs, money and every aspect of life.  Giving always allows you to receive.

Read more, Open Your Mind

It will take a long time for you to really start to grasp how the world works Jonathan.  I have run across people who are in their 20’s and have their shit together, so I know it is possible.  Read some books and pay attention to the ideas they share.

 

Read “The Game of Life and How to Play It” by Florence Scovel Shinn and really think about it.   Understand that each thought that you have in your head matters. Those you entertain really matter and will affect your experience in life.  You have the ability to decide which thoughts are entertained in your mind, and your thoughts will dictate how you act in life, treat other people and what comes into your life.

 

This is important.  More important than playing golf, more important than the time you waste doing nothing, and certainly more important than any of the television you watch.  Once you read this book, follow the progression and read what seems natural, my suggestion is Believe in Yourself by Joseph Murphy.   As you read, your mind will expand, and we can start making good decisions earlier on in life.  Then as I write this I will be president or at least I will be rich.  You can’t be stopped once the light of intellect is sparked and you look at the world with an open heart and mind.

 

So there it is, a long message to myself.  If I knew myself from the past, you will stop reading after the first paragraph.  But don’t worry I included plenty of pictures so you will be entertained. Like most people, I don’t really want you to change a thing, because I think we have ended up in a good place and the future is wide open.