Category Archives: Personal Growth

The Gift of Choice

People are given a gift of choice. Some are keenly aware of this and make decisions to understand the power of their choice to move one closer or further away from the life they desire by the honesty, integrity, and character of each of their decisions. Other people move blindly through life with no awareness of the power of their choice. They muddle through situations blaming outside influences, other people, or even something like the weather for their problems. In my observations of life, I am sure that we are in the place we are at, experiencing our lives in the manner we are due, almost exclusively, to the things we allow in our minds and the choices we make because of them.

Responsible or Not?

There is nobody responsible for your situation but you. People who understand this and live this way seem to have much more in their lives than one would want to be accountable for. The choice of responsibility brings you power, and appointing blame somewhere else takes the power of your being away.

People give their power away through blame, judgment, and wishful thinking. Your choice to accept responsibility for your circumstances brings freedom and power. Many events will happen we have no control over, but we always have 100% control over our response to any situation, and it is in this choice all of our power of attitude exists. Placing the blame won’t change anything but give you a negative attitude, place you further from a solution, or understand the lesson the situation teaches you. Or you can let another person or a situation make choices about your emotions, attitude, and thoughts. This choice is exclusively up to you.

Positive or Negative?

The choice to be positive or negative in your thoughts, actions, and attitudes is a decision a person faces continually throughout life. It is my observation most people have slanted one mentality or the other. Not surprisingly, their life circumstances serve them precisely what they seek. Keeping a positive perspective doesn’t make bad things enjoyable, but it will allow you a tool to deal with them in a better way.

A negative attitude will take you to a location of disappointment, sadness, anger, frustration, or somewhere else on that spectrum. A positive attitude won’t change the present circumstances as if by magic, but choosing to look positively will help you find the best path in your life. The tragedy is a tragedy, and pain is pain. It will hurt and be discouraging no matter how you think, but it will not define your life if you focus on the good that is still around in your life. Or you can choose to be miserable and let every “bad” thing that comes along derail you and potentially destroy you. That choice is yours and yours alone.

 Love or Not?

You have a choice to practice love in all situations or to be mean and selfish. Being human provides us with a continuous option to either be open to love or to close ourselves off to the possibilities of love. When we were young, perhaps we found pain in caring or being disappointed with those we loved. So we close our hearts and choose not to let anyone else in. The belief that others will hurt us has led me to a lifetime of relationship failures. I think most people are similar. It is easier and less risky to be on your own in life.

Life is a situation built to be lived in conjunction and connection with other humans. I aim to open up and allow new things and people into my life. As people lean into the possibility of love, they learn to love themselves. We are all the people we were when we were born. Perfect, and here for a reason. It seems life is an experience to remember exactly who we were.

Indeed there are choices in life every day, and the joy we give and receive in life will ultimately result in our ability to choose well or not. My challenge to you is to take a moment this day and every day to be aware the choice exists for you, and you are responsible for them. Good, bad, happy, or sad is all up to you.

“You are free to make whatever choice you want, but you are not free from the consequences of the choice.” -Anonymous

Decisions are the hardest thing to make, especially when it is a choice between where you should be and where you want to be.” -Anonymous

“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” Nelson Mandela

“The 3 C’s of life: Choices, Chances, Changes. You must choose to take a chance, or your life will never change.”

“Make good choices today, so you don’t have regrets tomorrow.” Anonymous

 

Books to Grow Your Mind

There is nothing that has allowed me to grow and understand life on a new level more than the books I read. They are a portal into knowledge and understanding that I can only hope to comprehend adequately. I know that my personal growth has stemmed directly from my experience with books and I wanted to share a few of the most recently read that I can highly recommend to all interested parties.

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

f5b978_861eea61847e45c39af1e1a019db3481This book provides simple and sensible guidance about life. It delves into the collective dream of society and the personal beliefs that we have agreed with and given power to. Yet many of these agreements are unhealthy and untrue, yet we allow them to stay a part of our lives. The book is based on Toltec Wisdom.

The four agreements are the ideas all people should adopt.  1. Be impeccable with your words. – Your words have power and how you use them is important.  2. Don’t take anything personally. People’s behavior is based on their experience and has nothing to do with you.  3. Don’t make assumptions Make sure you ask questions, speak your mind and never assume that you are sure about someone else’s thoughts. Many problems can be avoided. 4. Always do your best. This is simple advice but how many people do this in all that they do? Your best is effort is going to vary due to energy, health, time of day or any number of other factors, but if you continually give your best effort life gives back to you its best effort as well.

You can read this book over and over and get new things out of it. Also, lead to me reading other Don Miguel Ruiz books The Mastery of Love and The Fifth Agreement and also a book by Don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. called The Five Levels of Attachment.

The Biology of Belief by Bruce H. Lipton

bruce-lipton-quote-3A cellular biologist, Lipton started to make some radical discoveries about the behavior of cells. They didn’t work as he believed and his experiments led to his belief that what people believe affects their cellular makeup for everything from susceptibility to disease to how happy we are with our lives.  The basics are that our development has a lot more to do with our beliefs than it does with our DNA. It is an eye opening thought and supports the findings of Quantum Physics that our power as observer dictates our reality. Worth a read because it is a positive, empowering book. You are in control of your thoughts.

Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins

Personally, I find Tony Robbins annoying, but I love his message. Tony Robbins does a great job tony-robbins-quotes-41presenting you with steps that you can take in order to become better at what you are looking to improve at. There are many Robbins books out there, this one was written in the late 1990’s but the advice is still relevant today. If you want to be the best that you can be, this is a good place to start.  An example dealing with problems: people have issues dealing with their problems when they think the problem is permanent no problem is permanent big or small, pervasive, no one problem controls your whole life or personal, a problem is a challenge to learn from not a personal defect in our personality.

Robbins does a great job in providing simple to understand keys for a problem and gives you a place to start making changes. And of course, there is a giant within all of us. He also has a great process for changing beliefs that can help eliminate limiting thoughts. You will definitely have more tools to be successful after reading this book.

 The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

the-alchemist-quotes-deep-wise-sayings-testGreat little read that tells a vital story. Each of us has a personal legend and we need to take action to make it come into reality. Having faith in life and the world will allow a person to find all of their personal power. It is a story that all can relate to and makes you look at your personal legend. It was probably not made by watching television or losing yourself in modern media.  We are all looking for the hidden treasure that will make our lives special, but the journey is always the real treasure, as much as the destination. Positive, powerful and life altering are words I would use to describe this quick little read. It is good for the soul and will have an impact on your life. I couldn’t recommend a book higher.

The Road Less Traveled by Scott M. Peck

155061_508544769168567_1480336927_nThis book was written in the 70’s I think, but its message is true for today. It begins by warning that there is always difficulties in life and once we accept that fact, it tends to not affect us as much anymore. This book is a guide to developing a person’s true self-building more meaningful relationships and providing an understanding of your actions.  I like books that provide actions that help us along the spiritual path, I find this book a great help.

Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life by Dr. Wayne Dyer

wayne-dyerThis project by the late Wayne Dyer provides an in-depth interpretation of Lao Tzu and the Tao Te Ching. The power of the Tao is all around us and the simple verses of this document allow for deep thought and personal growth on each page. Dr. Dyer does a nice job providing a connection to the modern world from each and every one of the 81 verses. Each time you read it, there are new insights that can help you develop as a person and contribute more to your family and the world. You can, in fact, change your thoughts and change your life for the positive each and every day.

Change your information and you will be learning to fly!

Fly along with me
I can’t quite make it alone
Try to make this life my own
Fly along with me
I can’t quite make it alone
Try to make this life my own

I’m looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something help me burn out bright