Tag Archives: getting better

Cycles of Growth and Change

Life is like a game that brings you a varied experience. From the time we are born,  we move through cycles of change, which allow us to grow and become more mature and eventually become a powerful, positive-thinking human beings in the world. Some play this game on a loop. They get to a certain point and then try to stay in that comfortable place where everything is known, and the challenges are few.  The problem with this is that there will be little growth or purpose in life.

To avoid the pendulum of experience that swings from success to failure to gain and lose is impossible.  Our fear of loss and failure stops us from moving forward and risking all we have for the potential reward of becoming better people. We are too comfortable right where we are, even if we are unhappy or unsatisfied.  All life cycles have value and provide an opportunity to become the best version of ourselves. It would help if you had the courage to keep moving forward, regardless of the losses you might seem to leave behind.

Opportunity for Growth Everywhere

To become our best selves, we have to embrace growth opportunities. This can mean a new job, relationship, or trying something new for the first time. Growth is generally a positive experience that makes us more confident and provides joy in life. It will lead to change, and change brings an initial feeling of discomfort with it. Many people return to uncomfortable and harmful situations to avoid this awkward feeling of growth.  Even good change requires you to say goodbye to things, people, and places you enjoy and are comfortable with.  To grow, you need to dissolve a part of the past. Like a snake shedding its skin to become more mature, you must leave to get something.

Nothing can grow forever, but growth symbolizes life, and when you are reaching the end of the grand cycle of life and growth is no longer possible, it is time to move on.  Learning is the key to growth. All people can learn something new and become better at something in their lives. You always know what you want to learn because it is drawn to you like a magnet. Follow your interests in whatever paths they lead you. Don’t let age or the limiting expectations of others stop you. Modern society wonders that all information is located right at your fingertips. Search, learn, and grow. Develop and maintain a growth mindset throughout life.

Don’t Fear The Down Cycles

There are a time and a purpose for all things that happen. Sometimes it isn’t easy to see the positives in a situation, but we only have our perspective to look at things. We can’t see the landscape around us when we sit in the forest ourselves.  In general terms, down cycles are necessary for spiritual realizations to occur. The power of loss and pain draws a person to look for the meaning behind it all. If we move from success to success and never have time requiring character, we will never want change. Life is too comfortable.

Life never stays comfortable for most people. For some, it takes a significant life shake-up to force change and an investigation of things that are new and wonderful for you.  The hard times are not fun but are needed. People have experienced many deep losses, which have pushed them in new directions of development.  A new career, a new hobby, an activity that brings you peace, or even an appreciation of who you are and what a joy it can be to be a living human living on this great Earth.  All because you experienced a time of challenge in your life.  Be grateful for the challenge because it made you a better person.  Perhaps the version of yourself you were meant to be all along.

Final Analysis

So before you jump out and label one thing bad and another good, remember that the event is only the catalyst. The streams of reaction results also need to be analyzed. Often you never see your shortcomings until life points them out to you.  How can you improve something when you have no idea it exists?  It is that way when you look at failure and success. Often we get so wrapped up in perceptions we don’t understand what opportunity life has given us.  “Failure lies concealed in every success and success in every failure.”

Look for the lesson, not the perceived result, and seek ways to improve yourself.

“The perfect orchestration of the symphony of life is one of the Creator’s greatest and most beautiful miracles.” ― Suzy Kassem

“ Dharma or Ethics and Morals are the Fundamental Set of Rules created for those who want to play the Game, by those who are Inside the Game.” ― Vineet Raj Kapoor

Getting Better or Getting Worse

In all things, we are either getting better or worse. Wisdom is one of the factors in our lives that determines the soundness of our actions or decisions, based on our use of the experience we have, the knowledge we have acquired over the years, and the excellent judgment we have produced. When do you know that you are wise? When do you know that your decisions are sound? It takes some thought and effort to evaluate everything we experience in life.

Thoughts to Seek

Our minds are a powerful tool, producing a non-stop stream of thought left unguarded or unwatched; it has just as much negative energy as positive energy. Our mind reacts to the input you give it. From the books, you read, shows you watch, games you play, or people you choose to spend your time with. All have input into the machine of the mind. Like children, our thoughts will run wild and unruly without discipline. There are thoughts you can choose to seek, which will make you stronger.

Any thought that weakens you in any way should be avoided and eliminated. How can you control what you think? In some ways, you can’t, but what you can do is choose the thoughts you pay attention to. When a negative thought comes up, and you know it doesn’t serve you become your best self. Let them slide by you without addressing them. Then move your thoughts to something that does move you toward your best self. Invest your energy into these thoughts and follow where they lead you. And your thoughts will become a more valuable and powerful commodity.

Which Thoughts are the Right Ones

Recognizing the thoughts you should hold onto is easier than you might think. Look simply at the source and result of the thought. Does it come from fear? Or does it come from love? It is easy to recognize which is which. Thoughts of fear are negative and bring with them all the downside of fear. Anger, envy, sorrow, regret, arrogance, self-pity, dishonesty, arrogance, false pride, and ego are thoughts you should let slide by you. While thoughts of peace, acceptance, happiness, joy, humility, kindness, serenity, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. These are the thoughts you want to pay attention to.

The paradox is that no matter what you do, all of these thoughts exist daily within each of us. It is the ones we give our attention to which will dominate our lives. Every person will represent their dominant thoughts or the ones they choose to focus on. If fear is your predominant thought pattern, the negative list will be on your way to feeling happy. When you are worried about what you are getting out of something, it will generally be negative. When you are concerned about what you give to a situation, it will probably be a positive experience. These thoughts empower you and allow you to enjoy the knowledge that life is providing you.

Why It Is Important

It is essential to know that you control which thoughts you focus on because if you are entertaining a constant flow of fear, they will eventually wear you down. You will slip more and more into a mindset of fear allowing all of the negative things above to creep into your reality. For example, hating someone will wear you down, make your reality less enjoyable, and never once harm your enemy. Letting these things dominate leads to easy anger, needless conflict, and general unhappiness.

Learn to embrace the positive in you and follow those thoughts, and you will see the enjoyment of your life improve. Rather than fearing getting robbed of something or not getting your fair share, you will be looking at what you can share. The positive thoughts allow a person to live in harmony with the things around him and not let needless anger cloud their judgment. Wherever you are in your mental world, please take a moment and evaluate it and remember.

We are constantly getting better or worse, and the thoughts we choose to pay attention to in each moment will determine both the level of our improvement and the amount of enjoyment we get in life.

“Start each day with a positive thought and a grateful heart.” – Roy T. Bennett.

“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.” – William James.

“Be mindful. Be grateful. Be positive. Be true. Be kind.” – Roy T. Bennett.

“The positivity in our life is a function of our thinking. So think positive, stay positive!”

 

The Numbers

challenges-make-life-interesting

Age is just a number. However, some numbers are much more intimidating than others, and turning 50 is one. It happened to me a few years ago and to a friend of mine just this week.

To me, at this milestone, I have conflicting feelings. I assume all people are the same. I have fears and insecurities about life, just as I did when I turned 40, 30, 20, or even 10. Hopefully, I have developed tools and learned lessons that have helped me positively navigate the aging process—embracing the experience. Reflection is one of the tools that I use to understand the value of an incident. To take that lesson into living my life every day.

Challenges

Life is designed to bring a series of challenges we all have to navigate. Each challenge presents us with choices. Choices challenges and choicesthat define our lives. A problem may overwhelm us, crush us, and destroy our confidence if we allow them to. However, there is always another choice. To seek the better version of ourselves and choose to rise and live our lives in a way that reflects the best version of the living. These choices we have been making from the beginning and will continue to build until we reach the inevitable end. The challenges we face and the choices we make about them will dictate the experience of our lives.

People tend to keep their most painful lessons to themselves. This secrecy is to keep up a perception that we are in control. Handling all events efficiently and with style. In Reality, all people are just making it up as they go. It is self-delusion, and a person believes they understand it all. There is always more, no matter how much one learns, observes, and understands. The vast undiscovered iceberg of knowledge is still floating toward us undiscovered. There is always something else to learn and more growth to achieve.

Growth

To be your best is the ultimate goal of life. Not to accumulate a large cache of material possessions but to become the best version of yourself. That is where the challenges come in. Without change, things become stagnant.

growth is constant
The opportunity for growth is constant.

Often we become so comfortable in life, just the prospect of change is tremendously scary.

Reflection and growth can only come when challenged and forced to take in new information and experiences. Life is a gift, and you need to grow to get the most out of it. The alternative is to shrink a little each day until your gs are challenging to remember and your passion has faded.

Fortunately, it is never too late to recapture the passion for your dream. Your creativity is still there, dormant underneath all of the routine, predictability, and conforming expectation behavior. It is just waiting for you to remember. The sad thing is that many will not remember, but you decide your destiny.

You choose your path and direction. You allow life’s experience to push you. Will you fight or flee? Will you stand proud or hide in shame? Only you can decide.

I have turned 50  and feel I am only at the beginning of things. I am ready for the growth and the challenge of life. I look forward to it, and I embrace it. Regardless of your age, I wonder how you face life.

“There must be a goal at every stage of life! There must be a goal!” – Maggie Kuhn

“Aging is not ‘lost youth’ but a new stage of opportunity and strength” – Betty Friedan

“This is a youth-oriented society, and the joke is on them because youth is a disease from which we all recover.” – Dorothy Fuldheim

“Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.” – Franz Kafka 

“You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they grow older.” -Anouk Aimee

 

Improve

Improvement and growth are what life is about.  I try to be a little bit better today than I was yesterday. The great thing about this is there are literally thousands of ways improvement came come. I focus on the big categories of life, spiritual, mental, and physical. Still, there are specific things each day you can focus on to improve your energy, productivity, and enjoyment of life.  Today there are three that I am focusing on just because I came across them in my notebook.

Enjoying Life

There are days when everything flows perfectly, just as you want it to. But other days are not so fluid. Often we blame the weather, other people, or life in general for the problems.  The enjoyment you get out of life is never from how smooth things go but how you react to them.  Each moment has good things in it, and if you can avoid attachment to a certain outcome, then all results become something you can enjoy.  We are not all-powerful gods, and occasionally things out of our element are going to happen.  Learn to roll with it.

This means I am focusing on enjoying the rain and the sun, the cool and the heat, the love, and the anger. It is all there, so it must be there for a reason. Those who judge me are there to remind me not to be judgmental. Those who love me are there to remind me to love others. There are just too many good things and experiences in life to focus on the bad ones.  I am working on enjoying life and all of its experiences. It is a short ride, after all.

Improve Relationships

Relationships with others are the way we get our bearings about ourselves. I am fortunate to have great relationships with special people, but there is always room for improvement in all of them. I want to get better at making sure that those I love know it and understand how much they mean to me.  In a relationship, there are two parts, yours and theirs. Allowing them to grow and for you to grow as well is a good thing. I am looking for new ways of appreciation and love. 

I am fortunate to have been in relationships where we embraced new things all the time and tried fun things together. It is fun and allows us to experience life on a level of adventure, which is fun and exciting.  I want to make sure that I never take that for granted and continue to enjoy all the things we do which are new and interesting. I have a suitcase of memories, but I want to fill a large storage building with them.  So I want to continue to improve in enjoying all relationships and all the things that are unique about others. People enter your life for a reason, and most often, it is to teach you something. There are a rare few that stay for the duration, and those are the ones that teach, allow us to teach them, and learn together with you. Improving yourself and your life.

Move Away From Worry and Fear

This is a broad range of topics for how I look at others and life in general. It can be difficult to keep an even keel and see the good in all people when they do such a good job of hiding it. But look, and you will find it and see it.  Much of my mindset is positive, but I am not perfect and have moments of poor quality thinking.  Sometimes fear creeps in and makes you look at people harshly.  Worry and fear are a combination we all face daily. We are afraid people won’t meet our needs in some way. What is anger but a loud alert to the world we are afraid of not having our needs recognized or met?  Worry is the same, and we create grand scenarios in our minds that will never happen and give them our attention. Even though it is only misplaced imagination, the stress you feel is real, and that releases hormones into your system, which are detrimental to your health.

To lessen the effects of fear or worry, it takes an active consciousness.  I am endeavoring to be aware of my thoughts and their resulting feelings.  Determining if they are something I should really be afraid of or if it is just a figment of my imagination created by misguided thought? Most people never look at their thoughts in any real constructive way. That makes you a slave to any thought that pops into your head.  We think we react to, and thoughts of fear and worry are prevalent in our lives because we are inundated with messages of fear through the media and society in general. My goal is to remember that love is greater than fear, and it is always a choice. I can’t control how others live their lives, but I can improve how I experience mine.

So that is it, I will endeavor to become a better person today than I was yesterday!! I will enjoy life more, value my relationships and improve them, and move away from worry and fear towards love.  How about you?

“The health of your brain is much more about your actions than your age.” —Dr. Daniel Amen

“You’re either green and growing, or you’re ripe and rotting.” —John Addison

“Growth is actually contagious, so if you want to reach your goals, you’ve got to get around people who are going in the same direction you want to be going, and you will catch the success.” —Dr. Henry Cloud

“Beginning today, set an intention and a relentless focus on living your life as the greatest person you can be, in all situations.” —Brendon Burchard

“When you are at that intersection in the road, and you’ve got two paths to go down, because of the impact of certain people in your life, you’re able to choose the right path.” —Jason Witten

Getting Better

Are you getting better or worse?

ImproveIn every moment of your existence, you are getting better, or you are getting worse.  Rarely does an individual linger on the same level? Your abilities, talents, and focus fluctuate like the stock market. The center of your consciousness will determine the determining factor of which way your stock is going. The things you place your thoughts, words, and actions on and about will assess your ability to achieve and value those things you accomplish. Look at where you are and what you are doing and ask the simple question: Is this making me better or worse?

Your Mind is Yours

When it comes to your thoughts, nobody controls them except for you. However, you have to be aware of what you are thinking and why you are thinking. We are all creatures of input. From the time we are born, we are looking for information that will allow us to thrive and enjoy life.  Sometimes we get off track and let our thoughts drift to a focus on things improvethat do not make us better or honor us at all.  It is a simple list of the ideas that make a person better, and they are the thoughts that come from love. Gratitude, kindness, caring, acceptance, understanding, and the like will help you improve both your experience and the experience of those you interact with.

The thoughts to be avoided are all based on fear.  Gossip, judgment, hate, anger, selfishness, greed, and all of these types of ideas take you down the path of a weaker mind.  Your mind belongs to you, and what thoughts you choose to entertain is your decision alone. Taking responsibility for this is one of the first steps for mental improvement. Do not let the media, a teacher, a parent, a friend, or an institution make your choices of thought for you, or not improving will be the least of your worries. Be conscious of your options every moment, and you will be able to progress steadily to enjoying life more, and you will be able to help others as well. You can improve by being conscious about your thoughts every moment of every day.

You Only Have One Body

When we come into this life, we receive a body to go through this ride, and it seems that we are intent on abusing it until the day we die. How many people are killing themselves slowly with addictions, which also limit the improveenjoyment of life?  Smoking, drinking, abusing drugs, problems around food, and unrealistic body image problems are all ways we consciously or unconsciously need to improve.

Your body is a gift that, when you’re young, you take for granted. It does incredible things in movement, jumping, throwing, and running.  Yet, we seem intent on diminishing these skills from the start.  All addictions begin with a choice that something in you missing and can only fill it by adding something to us because we feel we are just not good enough.  Here is a secret that most people never hear. YOU are good enough. You are great, and no matter where you are today, you can improve and be a little bit better tomorrow.

If you have weight issues, do something to improve. Exercise, eat more consciously, or both. It is not easy, but anyone can do it. There are thousands of opportunities for life improvement, and they will only end the day you die.  Make the most of your opportunities to improve your body and your physical experience of life. Be conscious of your thoughts, words, and actions in all of your physical activities.  Are you getting better or getting worse?  It can seem like a mountain to climb, but you can’t undo 30 years of poor choices in an afternoon, it takes a continual focus, and that can happen. Improve your physical self today. Take a small step on your journey to enjoying life more.

We are All Connected

What is spirituality? I define it as how we look at life and what it means to have this human experience. Why are we here? There are many people much smarter than me who have come up with great answers for this. Unfortunately, each of us has to answer this question on our own. Improving your spirituality a matter of answering this question for yourself improveevery day.  How do your thoughts, words, and actions help others on their path? Or do you prohibit the development of others?  Your actions define the energy that you put into the world.

If you don’t believe it, look at your own experiences. If you spend time with someone who holds a negative view of the world and is always complaining, that negative charge can be felt and even transferred into your life. A person can do the same with a positive outlook. Their brighter outlook transfers into the lives of those they touch.  What type of energy are you giving to the world? I think that at its core, that is what spirituality boils down to in your life.  How you look at the world and your place in it.  Are other people out to hurt you or help you? Are you here to hurt others or help them.

Your conscious thoughts, words, and actions determine if you are getting better or getting worse in this area.  Choose to improve, and the world will improve as well.

Today you have a choice to improve and get better in all phases of your life or not. Nobody can control that choice unless you allow it, and in the end, when your life is slipping away, you will be the only one responsible for what you have done. Did you try to improve or allow other influences to determine what you did mentally, physically, and spiritually?

When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too. ~ Paulo Coelho