Tag Archives: acceptance

Approaching Life with Mindfulness

In a world that is continually moving faster and providing more and more distractions to pull you out of the present moment, it is more important than ever to learn how to be aware of the present moment.  A person can lower stress and enrich their life experience by cultivating this awareness.  In this article, I will try to explain what mindfulness is and give some examples of how to practice a mindful life.

Understanding Mindfulness

Mindfulness is defined as the state of being engaged and fully present in the moment, right now.  Judgment or attachment is not present in relating to your thoughts, emotions, or current external circumstances.  One tries to be aware of the thoughts and feelings every situation brings into our lives from external stimuli and internal thoughts and responses to whatever is happening, and accepting it.

Today, mindfulness has become a mainstream practice and is widely studied and adopted in fields like psychology, medicine, education, and corporate settings. It has proven to be an effective tool for enhancing overall well-being, reducing stress, improving focus, and promoting emotional resilience in the face of life’s challenges. The integration of mindfulness into various secular settings has made it accessible to people from diverse backgrounds and beliefs, making it a universal practice that transcends its original origins.

Benefits of Being Mindful

So many positives come to you when you understand the present moment is all you have. It will help you reduce stress and anxiety because you are eliminated regrets about the past and worry about the future by existing in the only thing you have, the present moment.

By doing this you will also improve your Mental clarity and focus.  Rather than having your thoughts bring up uncontrolled images of yesterday or tomorrow, a person can focus on what today is bringing into life, good or bad, and accept it as a part of life’s experience.  Rather than resist it because it doesn’t match your perception of what life should be.

Our emotions also benefit from the practice of mindfulness, because we start to be aware of the feelings we are experiencing in the moment.  We can learn what each emotion actually is and what thoughts or experiences have brought it to the surface.  Without mindfulness and awareness, we will be a servant to these feelings. Understanding and acceptance puts the power in your hands, so you are in control of what happens.

What you are aware of you control, and what you are not mindful of controls you.  That is the way many deal with their emotions throughout their lives.  The practice of being aware of your experiences throughout the day will enhance the quality and experience of your life.

Avoiding the Negative Loop

This human experience can be confusing. As we try to figure out where we fit in, something changes, and we are left looking for a new equation that will lead to our success, acceptance, and happiness. But we spend time choosing and creating narrow attachments and expectations for the outcomes. If something doesn’t work out just like we think it should, that is bad, and we choose to be unhappy. When I let go of how I think the world should be and accept it, I can also find the good in each moment.

Suffering

Life is going to bring its share of challenges. No person will live for an extended period, having everything go just perfectly. If they did, there would be no opportunity for personal growth or self-development. You would be stagnant, just as you were. It w, and it is like continually being a child with no developing maturity. Suffering comes from the thought that what is happening in your life is not as you think it should be. Something is wrong and needs to be fixed. This can result from any challenge which shakes your reality.

It can be a relatively minor thing, like an annoying co-worker, to a big something like a loved one’s death. The idea you need to fix things because they are wrong will lead you to fear, worry, insecurity, resentment, criticism of others, criticism of yourself, tensions, stress, and all things which lead to dissatisfaction and unhappiness.

What if you didn’t do that?

The alternative is to open your mind and develop a broader vision of life and the things it brings your way. Perhaps the experience you are having, no matter how unsavory or harmful, is precisely what is best for you now. You don’t have to like it, but not wanting something won’t make it go away. Dealing with the present moment will allow you to become better.

Living in the present moment, not worrying about what the future will be, or regretting the past, will allow you to make choices that honor the present and see where true fulfillment comes from. It isn’t attached to the events swirling around your life. A “good thing” here makes you happy. A “bad thing” makes you unhappy. Realizing they are all just things to which you give meaning through your mental conditioning, expectations, and attachments.

Your Power

This doesn’t mean you accept someone treating you poorly; when this occurs, you don’t take it personally as an indictment of your value and see it as a clear issue of the person mistreating you. A loved one’s death is a sad occasion, but feeling bad won’t bring anyone back to life; the reality of the situation is what it is. How you deal with it, move on from it, and see your gratitude for the departed person’s influence on your life will allow you to grow and develop your power despite the loss.

Shift of Perspective

It is not an easy shift, moving your perspective from one of the ego-defined expectations to source-centered acceptance. If a life of fulfillment is your ultimate goal, then some movement in this direction is warranted. It will allow you to not drift to and from happiness to sadness based on the things occurring outside of you. Living like this gives all the power to those things. Never knowing from moment to moment if you will have the rug pulled out from underneath you or not.

Learning to see events as things outside of you and not letting them define your happiness is a rare power. Not identifying with our conditioned expectations, we can approach all situations with an open mind and heart. This will bring on feelings of acceptance, well-being, and ease about the events of your life. They are things that happen, not defining points of your character. In this understanding and practice, one will probably realize that life is, in fact, OK, just as it is. What if our most feared moments are just opportunities to grow?

Move Toward the Positive

Suppose you are honestly looking at your thoughts and see too many ideas and feelings falling into the negative. In that case, it is time for you to reevaluate how you are thinking and to start learning how to say “goodbye” to negativity. It is simple to do, but it isn’t easy. We are hardwired to be harmful, and changing that programming takes a slight rise in your level of consciousness and embracing the present moment of your life. Here are some ideas on how to move toward the positive.

Negativity Rising

Negativity rises from us as we deny the present moment of experience we are having. That means we spend too much time living in our future or our past and not enough time in the only moment we have, the present. Much of our negativity comes from fears we face, which result from putting our thoughts in the future. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, and worry are all from a fixation on the future and projections of the mind about what might happen. Our brains can create all sorts of doomsday scenarios for all aspects of our lives. We could be fired, get into an accident, lose someone, become a victim of a crime, or do any other horrible thing. A negative mindset is a natural result if you live with these fantasies.

So too, are the visits of the past and their ghosts of forgiveness. Suppose you allow your mind to troll through memories, searching for moments of guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, or any other negative experience. In that case, you are taking yourself to a place of negativity that may or may not even be real. We all remember things the way we want to remember them. Two people can see the same event and come to two different stories. Your memories of wrongs done in the past are as accurate. The past is over, and there isn’t anything you can do to change it. Learn whatever lesson you can glean, but leave the emotion out because all that will do is take you into a negative headspace, which is out of the only place we can live here, at the current moment. Forgive the past and those in it, most importantly yourself. It is all water over a dam, and it is our most significant challenge to let it go.

Today is All We Have

Accepting where we are at this moment is the beginning of any significant journey. When it comes to leaving negativity behind, look at where you are and decide what you want the tenor of this moment to be. Your thoughts will determine if you will spend time in the painful negative or the positive area of your life. Look at the things in your present moment—the weather, the sounds, the feelings, and the experience right now. Look at your thoughts and bring them into the present moment, rather than focus on the past’s wrongs or future worries. Focus on your experience now because that is all you will ever have.

Through a conscious look at the present, you can observe the things creating negativity, unease, discontent, and tension within you. Usually, they will arise because of an unnecessary judgment of others and resistance to the present moment. We develop habits of thought, just like we develop patterns of behavior. Most people take the same route to work because it takes less thought and effort to do this. The same can be said for our thoughts. Our patterns are developed and continually play along on an unconscious loop. Only the light of conscious awareness can interrupt these patterns. All negativity is a resistance to what is in one form or another. Stop resisting and move forward happily.

Self Observation

This is the tool for operating on a more conscious level of living. Watch your mental environment and see how it contributes to your emotional state. Our thoughts are naturally attached to an emotion based on our experiences in life. Try to direct your attention inward and observe the thoughts your mind is producing. Look at what you are feeling because of the ideas you have. Negative thoughts will lead to negative emotions. When an uncomfortable feeling appears, look at how you are avoiding, resisting, or denying your life right now.

Often people resent others and are not used to expressing this because of the fear of hurting feelings or making someone angry. But the emotion you feel is there for a reason, and bottling it up is unhealthy and leads to resentment and negativity. The cure is natural. Stop doing what you are doing and speak to the people involved, fully expressing what you feel. Or let go of the negativity you are feeling around the situation. It serves absolutely no definite purpose. All it will give you is powerful negativity in your life.

Acceptance

When negativity arises, learn to accept the things about you which have allowed them to rise to the surface. It is a part of your story, not one that has to run on forever. Once you practice accepting your thoughts, emotions, and reactions to things, please take the next step and start to notice the catalysts to these feelings as they come up in your mind. Seeing the entrance of all negative emotions will allow you to stop yourself from creating them in the first place.

An honest acceptance of all things, people, situations, actions, and feelings about them will eliminate negative emotions. You are living in this moment and conscious of your experience, and that will allow you to function without judgment and resistance to your life as it is. Negativity has no chance to be created in your life.

“Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others.”- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“I think we manifest the very thing we put out. If you’re putting out negativity, you will retrieve that same sentiment. If you emanate joy, it comes back to you.”- Robin Wright.

“There are so many great things in life; why dwell on negativity?”- Zendaya.

 

Happiness is an Inside Job

finding happinessI don’t know about you, but finding happiness in life depends on my perceptions of things and the people around me.   When you focus your actions around the things you can control (inside/out)and avoid letting the stuff outside of your experience, you can’t control the behavior you are living outside in. You will continually find yourself living at the whims of the things that happen to you rather than dictating what you would like to happen to you.

There seem to be two choices in life. Either I live from the outside in or from the inside out. The choice dictates how large the portion of happiness I  experience at any particular time is. But what does it mean to live from the inside out? There are factors we can control in life and others outside of us that we do not. We are blessed with the choice of the outside or inside dominating our consciousness, so we control the amount of happiness we experience. Awesome!

From the Outside In Not Finding Happiness

Too often, We can find ourselves allowing the things and the people who come into our lives to dictate our mood. A great example of this would be when a finding happinessperson cuts you off in traffic, and you let that act affect your mood negatively, your anger rises, and you let your whole day get away from you. When we allow others’ decisions and choices to dictate our moods and actions, we are far from finding happiness in life. It can be the same as the people we care about. If they are in a bad mood for no fault of your own or are mad about something else, it is all out of your control.

That leads to me not taking responsibility for my life. It is too easy to send blame in the direction of whatever or whoever has changed my mood. I blame the traffic, blame the crowd, blame loved ones, or blame my friends. All of these are a cop-out because the only one who can choose to be angry or suffer because of someone else’s act is you. All you can control in this situation is your reaction to someone or something. Make sure it comes from a place of love. Finding happiness starts with accepting responsibility for our actions and lives, which means seeing the outside influences for what they are.

From the Inside Out

This is when you are at your best because the opposite of what is described above is happening. All thoughts and emotions about life events come from inside, and we choose their influence on us. We do not have to be angry unless we decide to be. There is no need to be frustrated unless we choose to be. We don’t have to let the non-stop external stimulus dictate our mood because the choices are made from our positive perspective, accepting full responsibility for all aspects of our lives. When your emotions radiate from inside yourself out, they will be more positive, and they will also radiate outward from you either positively or negatively.

This is the ultimate responsibility because when you choose the reactions that you experience, your true self is allowed to come through. Each of us has this ability, but it gets clouded through the lens of what society has told us is essential, rather than making decisions based on what we feel is right or wrong. There is no unhealthy attachment to things outside of you because you’re living from the thoughts, words, and actions inside of yourself.

You Are The Shot Caller for Finding Happiness

finding happiness
Whatever Walter White says goes!

Living from the inside out allows us to be the best representation of ourselves that we can be. What the media tells you about how you should look no longer matters. Finding happiness does not come from what “they” tell you to do, be or look like; it isn’t relevant anymore. What they ask you to enjoy isn’t a part of your story anymore  (unless you allow it), and you are becoming your best self if you pay attention to the thoughts and emotions that radiate from you.

You are responsible for your moods and emotions because what you think, say, and do comes from inside you and radiates in waves out into the world rather than the other way around. Your inner goodness is a force that needs to be shared with the world. We are all happier when we focus on what we can control and make good choices and leave the things we can’t control, helping ourselves and others find happiness. Please focus on the things you can manage and push them in the direction you want to go. You have no idea what power you possess until you focus on deploying it in a valuable and vital way from the inside out.

“You can’t teach anybody anything, only make them realize the answers are already inside them.”
– Galileo Galilei

“How soon will you realize that the only thing you don’t have is the direct experience that there’s nothing you need that you don’t have?”
– Ken Keyes, JR

“Uncertainty is the only certainty, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.”
— John Allen Paulos

“If the only thing people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world.”
— Sydney Banks

“I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.”
— Maya Angelou

Moving On With Life

Acceptance is the Opposite of Judgment
Acceptance means you are doing the best you can with what you have.

Many of my difficulties in life have come from a lack of acceptance. Whether it was not accepting someone else’s behavior, my circumstances, or just how events played out. My lack of acceptance has and always will lead to difficulties. Acceptance is the opposite of judgment, the positive side to that negative coin.

I Accept Your Behavior

Acceptance-2It is not my place to judge someone else’s behavior. No permission from me needed to do anything, good, bad, or indifferent. All of the behaviors of others are their business and not mine. Instead of judging someone for my perceptions of their actions, I will accept that they are doing their best with their life’s knowledge, options, and circumstances. All people are doing their best with what they have to work with.

I Accept My Situation

In life, we all have dreams and goals. Some of us have better-defined plans than others. It is a time that I stop judging myself so harshly as I reach for these dreams. Look at the distance you have traveled down your path in life. It is remarkable all of the things that you have experienced. Instead of judging yourself, continue to experience each day, comparing your life with someone else’s preconceived notions about what you should have done, except where you are. We all have a learning curve that we need to know the things we need to experience to be the best possible.

Accepting where you are will allow you to focus on moving forward rather than judging where you are or what you have been through. I have done my best with what I had to work with, and I am sure you have too!

I Accept Life

Many things in life appear to be crying out for my thoughts, judgments, and opinions that it is difficult to understand that they need none of those serenitythings, from all of the negative stories presented by the national media to the happenings in my community. None of them need my thoughts, judgments, or opinions to be happening. n fact, often, it is the choice to offer these things that bring your feelings down and bring with them fear, worry, and anxiety in the worst way.

The thing is that accepting events of the world is not the same as condoning them. Bad things happen, and having compassion for all the people affected by negative things can be powerful. If you’re getting events to build fear and worry, creating a positive attitude is challenging; even more, it allows these negative thoughts to control your actions. Look at the fear being generated today against people from different religions. l people are doing the best that they can with what they have.

I know that you are doing the best you can with what you have, and the world is a better place for it.

If you think that I can be forgiven, I wish you would…………… Accept who you are, where you are, and what is happening.

“Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there’s got to be a way through it.” “Michael J. Fox

“D” e while alive and be thoroughly dead. T en does what you will, and all will be well.” “Philip Kapleau

“I am Dead, but it’s not so bad. I’ve learned to live with it.” “Isaac Marion

We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.” “Dalai Lama XIV

Follow my blog with Bloglovin.

Cycles of Growth and Change

Life is like a game that brings you a varied experience. From the time we are born,  we move through cycles of change, which allow us to grow and become more mature and eventually become a powerful, positive-thinking human beings in the world. Some play this game on a loop. They get to a certain point and then try to stay in that comfortable place where everything is known, and the challenges are few.  The problem with this is that there will be little growth or purpose in life.

To avoid the pendulum of experience that swings from success to failure to gain and lose is impossible.  Our fear of loss and failure stops us from moving forward and risking all we have for the potential reward of becoming better people. We are too comfortable right where we are, even if we are unhappy or unsatisfied.  All life cycles have value and provide an opportunity to become the best version of ourselves. It would help if you had the courage to keep moving forward, regardless of the losses you might seem to leave behind.

Opportunity for Growth Everywhere

To become our best selves, we have to embrace growth opportunities. This can mean a new job, relationship, or trying something new for the first time. Growth is generally a positive experience that makes us more confident and provides joy in life. It will lead to change, and change brings an initial feeling of discomfort with it. Many people return to uncomfortable and harmful situations to avoid this awkward feeling of growth.  Even good change requires you to say goodbye to things, people, and places you enjoy and are comfortable with.  To grow, you need to dissolve a part of the past. Like a snake shedding its skin to become more mature, you must leave to get something.

Nothing can grow forever, but growth symbolizes life, and when you are reaching the end of the grand cycle of life and growth is no longer possible, it is time to move on.  Learning is the key to growth. All people can learn something new and become better at something in their lives. You always know what you want to learn because it is drawn to you like a magnet. Follow your interests in whatever paths they lead you. Don’t let age or the limiting expectations of others stop you. Modern society wonders that all information is located right at your fingertips. Search, learn, and grow. Develop and maintain a growth mindset throughout life.

Don’t Fear The Down Cycles

There are a time and a purpose for all things that happen. Sometimes it isn’t easy to see the positives in a situation, but we only have our perspective to look at things. We can’t see the landscape around us when we sit in the forest ourselves.  In general terms, down cycles are necessary for spiritual realizations to occur. The power of loss and pain draws a person to look for the meaning behind it all. If we move from success to success and never have time requiring character, we will never want change. Life is too comfortable.

Life never stays comfortable for most people. For some, it takes a significant life shake-up to force change and an investigation of things that are new and wonderful for you.  The hard times are not fun but are needed. People have experienced many deep losses, which have pushed them in new directions of development.  A new career, a new hobby, an activity that brings you peace, or even an appreciation of who you are and what a joy it can be to be a living human living on this great Earth.  All because you experienced a time of challenge in your life.  Be grateful for the challenge because it made you a better person.  Perhaps the version of yourself you were meant to be all along.

Final Analysis

So before you jump out and label one thing bad and another good, remember that the event is only the catalyst. The streams of reaction results also need to be analyzed. Often you never see your shortcomings until life points them out to you.  How can you improve something when you have no idea it exists?  It is that way when you look at failure and success. Often we get so wrapped up in perceptions we don’t understand what opportunity life has given us.  “Failure lies concealed in every success and success in every failure.”

Look for the lesson, not the perceived result, and seek ways to improve yourself.

“The perfect orchestration of the symphony of life is one of the Creator’s greatest and most beautiful miracles.” ― Suzy Kassem

“ Dharma or Ethics and Morals are the Fundamental Set of Rules created for those who want to play the Game, by those who are Inside the Game.” ― Vineet Raj Kapoor

Leaving Judgement behind

judgementWhy We Judge

It can be easy to look at someone else’s life and quickly dissect all they are doing wrong or at least be doing better. Their lives seem like a simple puzzle; they are too lazy, too rich, too poor, don’t care enough, or care too much. People look so quickly and coldly that they never really see the harm that judgment can do to their lives.

It is negative energy, which will never be a good thing. Acceptance is the key to positive relationships in life. If you are looking for happiness, then judgment needs to be avoided at all costs. Who are we to judge someone else? There is no more precise definition of where you are in your journey than how you judge someone else. Or perhaps how much you misjudged someone else. 

Hiding In Plain Sight

So why do we all have such an inclination to participate in something that is clearly detrimental to our lives in every way? One of the reasons is that when we direct our attention and others’ attention outward toward someone else and their behavior, the poor decisions and mistakes you have made are overlooked. Isn’t there a safe feeling inside when you say, “I may be struggling, but I am not struggling that much?”  So our judgments are constantly distracting attention away from our weaknesses. Does that make your weaknesses any less real?

Putting someone else down with judgments automatically puts you in a position above whomever decisions are being thrown at. It defines you because you focus on distractions rather than working on your problems and becoming a better person yourself. Your concerns are still simmering in the background, waiting to boil over.  It is impossible to be happy when you know an explosion is coming. And there is an explosion of chaos coming your way.  

Defining Ourselves

It will come down to the choices that we make each day when it comes to judgment. You have the option to be more accepting of others and their challenges because, in reality, it is not any of judgment 3456your business.  The choice to look at yourself honestly and work on your decisions, thoughts, feelings, and actions is a daily struggle that you need to start to pay attention to.

We define ourselves for the world in each thought we have and each word we speak. There is an illusion that nobody sees our weaknesses in our minds if we create a big enough cloud of dust by speaking in judgment about others.  Not your circus, not your monkeys. You will decide whether your meanness and judgment define you or kindness, love, and acceptance. It is that simple. When you judge someone else, you are clearly defining yourself, and you are ignoring your areas that are in significant need of improvement.

I used to worry a lot about what other people thought of me. Now I am much more concerned with what I think of others and how I look at their behavior and try not to take their terrible actions personally. It is a reflection on them and has little bearing on me.

When you judge another, you do not define them. You define yourself.~ Wayne Dyer

Are you judging or accepting today?

 “When someone judges you, it isn’t actually about you. It’s about them and their insecurities, limitations, and needs.” Lulu

“Never judge someone by the opinion of others.” Anonymous

“Be curious, not judgemental.” Walt Whitman

 “Everyone has untold stories of pain and sadness that make them love and live a little differently than you do. Stop judging; instead, try to understand.” Anonymous

“I don’t judge others.” Sarah Jessica Parker

 

Knowledge Will Change You

BeliefOur minds work overtime sometimes, and we must establish a clear representation of our thoughts, goals, and perspectives on life to find our direction based on the things we truly believe. All knowledge will change you and move your consciousness one way or another and leave you with a final set of core beliefs representing your experiences and how you choose to interact with the world. Looking at my experiences over the last year, I needed to revamp my collection of what I think and look at other people.

So here is the current version of MY Mission Statement. Presented in no particular order, here are a few things I hold as truths in my life.

We Are All Connected

Call it God, the Universe, or whatever your religion dictates, but to me, we are all connected through a divine order. All people have the same abilities for great love and equal power to commit evil, which is just a part of this crazy game called life. We are given individual gifts at birth to make our unique mark on the world if we choose to do so. When you look at all things, events, and people in your life, you can see the thread that connects everything.

This connection runs through the hearts of all people. There is an illusion that our experiences are seperate events; a universal force is running between us all, connecting all of our stories. Remember this the next time judgment of others and separation’s effects enter your life. There but for the good fortune of your circumstances, go you. There is no difference between you and anyone else but choices and details. We are all connected.

Our Beliefs Control Our Lives

Each of us has developed throughout our lives a core belief system. We established most of these beliefs early on in life. These are limiting beliefs that delay or even stop our development completely. Our expectations were built by our parents, grandparents, siblings, teachers, religion, and peers. Most were developed before age ten and have remained with us to this day. Our beliefs have to power to achieve goals or stop us from becoming what we should be.

The great thing is that all beliefs can change at any point in life when we look and find irrefutable evidence that contradicts them. All of the “you can’t,” “no’s,” “you’re not good enough’s,” “You can’t make a living doing that’s,” or any other limiting statement from your youth making you feel like you are not good enough can be eliminated — the processing and acceptance of new information about you and your abilities.

Here is a secret; you are powerful and can do anything you set your mind to accomplish. You have the chance to try anything. Look honestly at the barriers stopping you; most often, you will find insecurities and limits that we place on ourselves because of limiting beliefs we choose to accept. Accept new ideas to guide you.

Your Actions Define YOU

Talk is cheap; what you do is the definition of your character. I have heard the soft and sympathetic words that were worth nothing but have been blessed by the actions of many great people. Saying you are something means nothing, and being that thing means everything.

Each day is a new opportunity to take action toward a goal or a dream that you have. Take a step, mail a letter, make a call, or do whatever small thing you can that will lead you toward your goal. Action is the power source for people’s dreams and will cancel out fear.

Every person that has ever been born has had a dream of some kind, and there are no exceptions. When a person takes action, they can make their dream come true. If that action leads to failure, then at least you know, and a direction more suitable to you may show itself from the effort.

Thinking Positively Leads to Positive Results

Bad stuff happens to everyone at some point in life; how you deal with it is crucial. Life is full of things that we define as good or bad. Positive thinking is not about ignoring the “bad” in life and always looking on the bright side, although those factors result. Positive thinking is bringing the focus of love, understanding, kindness, acceptance, and peace to all you experience—ignoring your counterpart’s hate, judgment, separation, meanness, and conflict.

All experiences have the power to bring the positive or negative inside a person to the surface, and what emotions and thoughts you let dominate your behavior will decide what actions come from you and what feelings are happening inside you. All things are just things until we assign a value to them and determine how we look at them.

All People Have Value

A person’s value is difficult to remember when I am angry or someone has hurt me, but that doesn’t change the fact that I believe this is true. People live differently, make poor decisions, and look differently, but they are all valuable and unique individuals.   All that separates us from the circumstances of another is mere chance. At our core, we are all beings of love, and understanding and are looking for acceptance in the world.

We are all born with a unique gift that can contribute to the world’s good. It is the meaning of life to find out what that gift is and how to use it. Some people lose their way through the experience of life and bury their talents too profoundly to be retrieved, but the reward is still there. With the right nurturing, perhaps it could resurface.

Gratitude is the Gateway to Abundance

How often do you appreciate all the positive things in your life? Moving through life each day is easy; let events and people swirl past you without absolute acknowledgment. Stop for a moment and give thanks for each experience. Even when the lessons are not what you are looking for, they will provide clues as to the direction you should be moving in.

Being grateful and putting yourself in that mindset each day creates an energy of acceptance around you, and that energy attracts more into your life. What you focus on multiplies; if you are grateful for what you have, you will have more things to be thankful for having in your life. Take time and reflect a bit each day on the blessings in your life. Breathing in and out and having an experience is a blessing many lose daily.

Forgiveness is Necessary to Move Forward

To forgive someone for something they did that harmed you is very difficult. It can’t just be lip service of saying you forgive; it has to be inside your heart. The only one who can give forgiveness is you, and the sooner you give it, the sooner you can move on. Letting go of pain, sadness, anger, or any other negative emotion is key to enjoying life.   I read somewhere that you know forgiveness occurs when you think of that person, and there is no subtle searing inside your heart. It can take a conscious effort, but with forgiveness comes freedom and strength.

Embrace Love, Avoid Fear

All people carry this inside of them, and the one you pay attention to will determine how much you enjoy this ride we call life. Focus on the love-based emotions like kindness, understanding, generosity, acceptance, patience, and love while avoiding the fear-based feelings and thoughts of anger, hate, separation, jealousy, stereotyping, and judgment. It can be harder to do than it sounds, but the effort is well worth it.

Remember that fear will be a continual battle for you throughout your life. It will attack you both outwardly with dangers real and imagined. It will also subtly invade your life through indirect methods, invading your thoughts and being powered by your emotions. All things will work out if you let them. Some powers exist which are far wiser than you. Learn to trust them.

Our beliefs are essential to the type of life that we live. If you do not work to control them, they will direct you. We all have to live with the results.

Getting Better or Getting Worse

In all things, we are either getting better or worse. Wisdom is one of the factors in our lives that determines the soundness of our actions or decisions, based on our use of the experience we have, the knowledge we have acquired over the years, and the excellent judgment we have produced. When do you know that you are wise? When do you know that your decisions are sound? It takes some thought and effort to evaluate everything we experience in life.

Thoughts to Seek

Our minds are a powerful tool, producing a non-stop stream of thought left unguarded or unwatched; it has just as much negative energy as positive energy. Our mind reacts to the input you give it. From the books, you read, shows you watch, games you play, or people you choose to spend your time with. All have input into the machine of the mind. Like children, our thoughts will run wild and unruly without discipline. There are thoughts you can choose to seek, which will make you stronger.

Any thought that weakens you in any way should be avoided and eliminated. How can you control what you think? In some ways, you can’t, but what you can do is choose the thoughts you pay attention to. When a negative thought comes up, and you know it doesn’t serve you become your best self. Let them slide by you without addressing them. Then move your thoughts to something that does move you toward your best self. Invest your energy into these thoughts and follow where they lead you. And your thoughts will become a more valuable and powerful commodity.

Which Thoughts are the Right Ones

Recognizing the thoughts you should hold onto is easier than you might think. Look simply at the source and result of the thought. Does it come from fear? Or does it come from love? It is easy to recognize which is which. Thoughts of fear are negative and bring with them all the downside of fear. Anger, envy, sorrow, regret, arrogance, self-pity, dishonesty, arrogance, false pride, and ego are thoughts you should let slide by you. While thoughts of peace, acceptance, happiness, joy, humility, kindness, serenity, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. These are the thoughts you want to pay attention to.

The paradox is that no matter what you do, all of these thoughts exist daily within each of us. It is the ones we give our attention to which will dominate our lives. Every person will represent their dominant thoughts or the ones they choose to focus on. If fear is your predominant thought pattern, the negative list will be on your way to feeling happy. When you are worried about what you are getting out of something, it will generally be negative. When you are concerned about what you give to a situation, it will probably be a positive experience. These thoughts empower you and allow you to enjoy the knowledge that life is providing you.

Why It Is Important

It is essential to know that you control which thoughts you focus on because if you are entertaining a constant flow of fear, they will eventually wear you down. You will slip more and more into a mindset of fear allowing all of the negative things above to creep into your reality. For example, hating someone will wear you down, make your reality less enjoyable, and never once harm your enemy. Letting these things dominate leads to easy anger, needless conflict, and general unhappiness.

Learn to embrace the positive in you and follow those thoughts, and you will see the enjoyment of your life improve. Rather than fearing getting robbed of something or not getting your fair share, you will be looking at what you can share. The positive thoughts allow a person to live in harmony with the things around him and not let needless anger cloud their judgment. Wherever you are in your mental world, please take a moment and evaluate it and remember.

We are constantly getting better or worse, and the thoughts we choose to pay attention to in each moment will determine both the level of our improvement and the amount of enjoyment we get in life.

“Start each day with a positive thought and a grateful heart.” – Roy T. Bennett.

“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.” – William James.

“Be mindful. Be grateful. Be positive. Be true. Be kind.” – Roy T. Bennett.

“The positivity in our life is a function of our thinking. So think positive, stay positive!”

 

Your Dark Gift

box of darkness “Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness, and it took me years to understand that this was a gift.”― Mary Oliver.

All experiences in life are an opportunity for growth and learning. The person you are today has been built brick by brick from the things you have gone through, both good and bad. Those things that were not so enjoyable or were extremely painful are often considered darkness, and the darkness that comes into our lives can be challenging to get rid of even many years later. Unfortunately, as we are going through these dark times, there is no natural way to gauge the benefits of coming down the road, but that doesn’t make the value any less tangible. What makes a situation dark? Is it something that another has done to us? Or is it our weakness and inability to say goodbye and move on?

Darkness Teaches Lessons

Love is a challenging game, and most of us start playing at a very young age. As we try to figure out the protocol rules, we are living our lives. Love brings extreme bursts of hormones and emotions that bce9d7147ee2eb2c5daaf2f4200af93bcause us to bond; eventually, those bonds become part of us. W en they are broken or taken away, it can be excruciating. T e dark box is the ending of a relationship and the pain that arrives in your life with it. There is sage advice that time will heal all wounds, and that is true, but the scars will remain and lessons learned last.

These lessons become the legacy of your experience, and in the end, after you have hurt, cried, and healed, there is the experience, and either consciously or subconsciously or both, you are going to use that experience as a guide for future decisions in affairs of the heart. You will make future decisions out of love if the lesson is positive. I  you choose to be bitter and feel sorry for yourself and be afraid of being hurt, problems will arise in all the relationships you try to engage in.

How many people suffer this way, unable to establish a relationship today because of the past pain and not wanting to go through it again? To use the darkness as a gift is to open your heart and be aware that it can be broken, but use the past lessons to take more intelligent risks. But take risks, live your life, and love. Let the darkness be a guide to what you want in life.

Darkness Exposes Light

The dark box is a gift because it is easier to see the light when you have dark. I stand out, and you can recognize the difference. F om the darkness in that box, we can learn to experience the light of life image14with more zeal and enjoyment. W en you are in the moment of love, enjoy it. I  may last forever, or it may end tomorrow. There is no guarantee. Be mindful of the moment and make that time the best it can be.

Wisdom isn’t gained by having a perfect life and making sound decisions. It is usually built through the painful teachings of bad decisions and questionable choices. It doesn’t come easy because easy experiences are quickly forgotten. Painful lessons last a lifetime. Evaluating a dark time and coming away with a plus is the beginning of wisdom. Applying that lesson to future endeavors is putting it into action and making that knowledge a part of your life.

Take your box of dark and explore it all. S e it for what it is, a broken heart, a broken promise, a significant loss. T y not to see it as a personal condemnation of you or punishment but as a valuable tool to help transcend your life. T  gift is that you may ultimately learn how to live totally in the light led by the dark that you have experienced.

Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift. ~Mary Oliver

The Dark gifts I have been given have left me thinking my light will go out forever. But when I look at my life now………..