Monthly Archives: November 2021

21

The Self

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Positive Thought Project

Self: A person’s essential being distinguishes them from others, especially considered the object of introspection or reflexive action.

When it comes to big questions in life, “who am I?” generally tops the list. We all have a sense of self from the time we first become aware. Our essential being is who we are inside, not the person we choose to show to others.  But what is honest about this?  Much of what we have come to identify with as our “self” is an illusion.  We carry around this sense of who we are, but it is based on many factors that are not us at all.  Our job, relationships, what we own, what others think of us, and even our thoughts about ourselves are not accurate representations of us. So how do you find out what defines your essential being?  That is a quest that will raise your consciousness, and it will start by paying attention to what you think of your “self,” the words you use speaking to your “self,” and the actions you take to show who you are.  What is your true SELF?

Mindfulness

One of the cures for the illusion of self we carry around is to begin to practice mindfulness. This is a practice of being aware of the present moment and accepting all that it brings you.  Your sense of self is revealed to you in the everyday experience of interacting with your world.  How do you see the sunrise? How do you see interactions with other people? How do you react to things? What do you believe about yourself and your abilities?  Each moment reveals the characteristics which make up our “self.” Watching them and accepting them is mindfulness.

The value of this is that you remove all of the expectations of the rest of the world.  They don’t matter who you are; they matter to who the world perceives you to be.  It is a false self that is contained in our ego.  Looking past these expectations is the first step of growth and seeking to remember who you are.  Forgiveness of those who hurt you and yourself for actions outside of your true nature is a must. Mindfulness is easy to practice but challenging as well because it can be painful to see your thoughts.  But try to stay in the moment, dwell on the past or worry about the future.  Be present and see who is there looking back at you. That is your true self.

Over 7 Billion People

It always makes me question existence when I consider that over 7 billion people in the world and a minimal number have spent any time contemplating their presence in any natural way. What you have in life and the “stuff” you can accumulate is not as important as the person you are.  The self is the one thing that belongs solely to you for the duration of your existence. Those things spring directly from your thoughts about the world and how you fit into it. Your actions and words define them.

Is your self greedy, shallow, mean, selfish, or any other negative word? Well, those things are in every person, all 7 billion. It is your choice whether they become an active force in your life or if your thoughts move toward kindness, forgiveness, peace, acceptance, or love. These are the things that define the “self” to the world.  Because you can say you are a positive person, but your conscious choices make it so or not so.

No Comparison

There is no need to compare your journey and progress to others. You are solely responsible for you as another is responsible for them. Don’t waste your valuable time comparing how you think, what you have, and how you spend your time against someone else.  The self you are has plenty of strength and talent. You just have to access it.  That will never happen if you waste your time looking over the neighbor’s fence to see where they are at in their journey.

Do the best you can.  Every day while you sift through your thoughts and deal with the situations, you are confronted with the moment to moment.  Never forget that in you is a divine creation capable, reliable, and ready to achieve anything you set your mind to doing.  Weight loss, working out, building a business, travel, relationships, or anything else you want in your life is there to touch if you have confidence in your “self.”  Be confident and love your “self.”

Be your best SELF today. It all starts with a greater awareness of your thoughts, the corresponding emotions that arise.  The words you speak to others and your actions will define you for all time.

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”– Buddha

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”– Mark Twain

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” – Lucille Ball

 

21

Dare To

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Dare to Be YOU

My goal is to establish a positive focus every morning by focusing on a positive word or phrase. There are enough negative influences in the world, and I believe we can improve our emotions, comments, and actions and make the world a better place through a conscious direction of thought.

Dare to Do

Courage is a commodity we only know we have when tested, and seeking these types of tests is a tough challenge. It is hard to put yourself out there for a new job, a new relationship, or to move to a new town. Whenever you face a unique situation, there is an opportunity to dare to achieve, accomplish, or grow. Threatening to keep going is to defy the obstacles in front of us and learn about ourselves and our lives. Life is a game of growth or atrophy. Either you dare to find out what you are made of, or you are satisfied withering away into the obscurity of what was. So today, I urge you to take a bold step and dare to do something that will allow you to become better than you were yesterday and fulfilled as a person.

Dare Against the Fear

Fear is a constant companion we all carry with us in all decisions we make. Often it is displayed in “what ifs” of life. What if I fail? What if it gets worse? What if it hurts? What if everyone thinks I am crazy? What if questions like this give the fear a place to live in your mind. Dare to take action today and try. As you make an effort to do something new, there is going to be a learning curve. There is a period when you learn the process and fine-tune the skills you need to accomplish your goals.

The biggest fear we carry is the fear that we will fail. We will never be that thing we dream of in our minds. This fear has stopped many people from ever daring to get started, but when you dare to begin, everything new and excellent has the opportunity to exist. When you dare to apply for that job or talk to that person, then the possibilities of everything are on the table. Without the daring to act, none of them do, and fear wins, keeping you safely in your place, not being who you are called to be.

Dare to Be Different

Our society is structured to reward those who follow a particular path. You do what is expected, and people will applaud and tell you how wonderful you are doing. Unfortunately, all people are different, and the things that allow them to grow and thrive as individuals vary. So we can’t all follow a straightforward path to find the value we seek or enable the treasure inside us to come out. We have to follow our path and dare to be different than others might expect us to be. It is in this daring that we will find our unique voice and power in the world.

Daring to be unique will always open you up to criticism from all fronts. But to be yourself in a world continually trying to force you to be something you are not is the daring to be true to yourself. Would you rather be criticized for daring to be who you are, or would you instead be praised for living a lie? A choice we all make every day.

Create from Your Soul

Daring to create is one of the best ways to see what is inside of you. Allowing your music to come out in whatever form it exists inside of you for the world to see is one of the biggest gambles we can take. Our creativity will show precisely how we think, feel, and believe about things, allowing the world to see that. We are then open to attack, and it takes a brave person to dare to create without worry about criticism or failure.

To create something simply because you want to, not because it will manipulate someone to think this or that, but because it is the message in your soul that you want to share with the rest of the world. Daring to create your art in whatever form is excellent. Daring to share it with others is monumentally brave. Be brave today and dare to share.

Be Daring Today

Today I call for you to dare create, be yourself, and share it with the world. Don’t hide behind the veil of what-ifs and allow your best creative self to shine forward into the world. Your actions will allow you to enjoy life more because you will be authentic to yourself and make the world a better place. Daring to shine your light into the world always makes things better. Dare to be your best self today and see what happens from that.

“The only dare you ever want to take is the dare to be all that you can be.”- Catherine Pulsifer.

“Dare to be your best self, see how high you fly. Never worry how far you might fall.”

“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much because they live in the grey twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.” —Theodore Roosevelt

 

Poem

Tomorrow

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A poem I wanted to share about tomorrow.

Tomorrow is a beautiful road

that will take you right where

you want to go…..

If you spend today walking away

from worry and moving toward

serenity; leaving behind conflict

and traveling toward solutions;

and parting with emptiness and

never giving up on your search

for fulfillment. If you can do

what works for you, your present

will be happier and your path will

be smoother.  And best of all?

You’ll be taking a step

into a beautiful future.

Douglas Pagels

21

The Courage

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We all have to walk down the dark corridors of our lives, and there are moments we need to find all the courage we have inside to keep moving forward even though fear is gripping our hearts. Courage is the ingredient that allows a person to take their next step, though they are afraid of what might happen. Freedom from fear shifts a person’s energy from the negative to the positive. Courage allows you to dismiss the opposing forces of doubt and fear and replace them with hope and expectation of something positive happening in your life.

You can choose to bring your courage into your conscious thought every day by recognizing the daily fears you face and still do what you have to anyway. Here are three significant concerns we all need to overcome at some point; 1. The anxiety of the future 2. fear of rejection 3. Fear of failure. With a shift in focus and awareness, we can deal with what scares us, and it starts with noticing your thoughts of fear and answering the question: Do I have the courage to face my nightmare?

Courage for the Future

Fear about the future is what many worries are based on. Somehow people believe that if they play out every nasty, negative, and painful scenario of what might happen in their mind, they will never be hurt or disappointed. Worry is negative energy that brings negative things into your thought process, the words you use with others, and, of course, the actions you take. Fear never brings anything good to anyone, and it robs you of the good things you have in your life right now. Isn’t this what anxieties of all kinds are based on? The future may have challenges in it, and those things will help you grow. Eventually, our death will come, and the ending of everything will ultimately happen. Worry won’t stop that. It just makes your experience of today far less enjoyable.

Put your worries away and focus on the positive things in your life right now. Enjoy the good things you have at this moment. Prepare for the future, as any responsible person would. But realize that whatever is coming your way is coming. There will be loss, sadness, and pain. There will also be joy, laughter, and great experiences. Have courage that you will be able to weather the negative, and the positive will be present in much larger quantities. Have courage about the future and the positive things it will bring to your life. There are no guarantees, so embrace the joy when it comes to you.

Courage about Rejection

People may reject you or something you do for many reasons, and the truth is, most have little or nothing to do with you. It is their past experiences, choices, and consciousness making those choices. Don’t take any of this personally. It is them, not you. Put your plan in action and do it in a way that makes you happy. Even though you may have lost someone or something you treasure, look for the good in the situation. It may not be easy to recognize, but it will be there.

Changing your perspective takes courage to do because there will always be naysayers and doubters. And often, the biggest doubter you will face will be in your head. Ignore their noise. People will come into your life who will discourage you. Make you doubt who you are and affect you negatively. If they put as much effort into pursuing their dreams as critical of others, they could accomplish anything. They are the definition of negative mediocrity. Give their opinions about all the attention they deserve. Non Have courage, try, create, do, go, find, build, and believe!

Fear of Failure

Now we come to what I think is the most common fear, and that is a failure. What is a failure but a label? We are trained in education to view breakdown as the worst result. Things are not always going to go perfectly. But it isn’t. If you are genuinely creating and reaching for something new, there is a real chance you aren’t going to get it right the first time. But each attempt at something provides information, experience, and skill. Those can work to a challenge, and the next time you will get a different result. The courage to ignore a negative view of failure and see how this situation provides an opportunity to grow, learn, and ultimately gain success. That is how it has worked throughout the history of man.

It takes real courage to face this challenge. Our society views anything but perfect results as a failure. There is little margin for error. Why is this? Could it be that if we encouraged thinking and fundamental knowledge, people would be less controllable? Individuals might develop ideas that would change things. Be brave and let your courage drive your process of learning. Not the expectations and judgments of narrow-minded small people. Give them all the regard they earn. They have no idea where you are going and what you can do. Unless you accept their narrative about you, it’s your choice to be more conscious of your courage.

Have Courage and Do It

Let your consciousness continually become aware that life is a little game. There is a beginning, a middle, and an end. We are all moving toward the inevitable, don’t waste your time in fear. Find your courage to make changes in your life that leads you toward living like your best self.

People fear change naturally, even if it is clearly for the better. Be brave and have the faith that it will work out in the end. Nobody can be sure where that end is, but having the courage and taking action will lead to a result. Find your courage today, and it all begins with a higher awareness of your thoughts, words, and activities. You can then learn, evaluate, grow, improve, and make better actions. You are eventually becoming and achieving what you want.

Courage- the ability to do something that frightens one.

We all have courage inside us that will allow us to achieve all of the great things we want to accomplish if we learn to use it.

“True courage is not the absence of fear—but the willingness to proceed despite it.”–Unknown.

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you are.”― E.E. Cummings Quotes On Courage.

“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.”― Coco Chanel Quotes On Courage

“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”― Winston S. Churchill.

 

21

Burn or Cross

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Cross it or burn it? We make these decisions often in life.
Cross it or burn it? We make these decisions often in life.

Living life provides an excellent classroom for learning. It would be easier if we had a manual at the beginning giving clear and unquestionable instructions on how to proceed in life.

Each situation would be so easy to deal with as we navigated our way along our path of life if we could only tell which bridges were safe to cross and which ones we should burn and never cross back over again.

I do not kid myself and think that if I had this sort of information, it would have made any difference to my behaviors. As a young man, I thought I knew it all, and I would cross each bridge on my terms and have no fear of the consequence. I didn’t want advice or guidance, I tried to cross the bridge and get to the other side, and if it was painful, well, that was life.

There is no way to know for sure what the other side will bring, but cross it and hope for the best.
There is no way to know for sure what the other side will bring, but cross it and hope for the best.

Over the years, a strange thing started to happen. All bridges looked scary to me, and I refused to cross any of them. This phobia led to a life malaise that was stuck in the same place. Even though I looked into the mist surrounding the bridge and wondered, “What is over there?” I lacked the courage to step across it and find out for sure.

As I got older, I felt compelled toward the bridges in front of me, I would tentatively take a step onto them and then retreat to the safety of the known, but deep in the back of my mind, I would think, “Is this it? Is this all there is in life and all I can look forward to?”

As the years passed, it became clear that life was happening out there across those bridges, and I had better get moving in one direction or another, or it would be too late. Burn one bridge or cross another. That was the option but do it now, or soon all of them will be burned by time.

With little planning but immense hope, I finally took the first tentative steps onto a bridge that looked sturdy enough to carry me across the abyss of danger below. Before I crossed, I torched the other bridges around, and there was no turning back. The bridge I was crossing would define my life and how I lived it.

As I moved along the bridge, walking step by step forward, I grasped the rail for some reassurance, but the only feeling was one of excitement wrapped in fear. All the years in limbo had fooled me into a false sense of self-confidence, which now was clearly on display.

Some will tell you that it is an excellent policy never to burn bridges because you will never know when you need them. I argue that recognizing the bridges to burn and the ones to maintain is one of the significant lessons in developing wisdom.

21

Suffering

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There are two sides to every coin, and in my life, I have found joy on one side and suffering on the other. The pain appears as the worst of things to experience in life and should be avoided at all costs.

Although I agree it is something that is not pleasant, it provides a necessary function for people. I wish things were always easy, and there was nothing but joy in my experience, but life offers difficult obstacles for each of us to overcome. How we think about our experience will bring us suffering or lessons. Pain is a choice of how we feel about each situation we are in life. It is a natural and inevitable part of life. We will have catastrophic loss and sadness in our lives. How we deal with it will define much of who we are and how successfully we live our lives. Your suffering is a choice and one I have made all too often.

Crutches of Life

Crutches are everywhere in life. These are things in our experience that limit us in one way or another. Some fall prey to wild pleasures and excesses in life, which distract you from your purpose and determine what can be accomplished. Others find jobs that are just enough above water to be acceptable but will never allow you to grow into the person you could be. All crutches of the world we adopt to “help” get us through life will cause suffering and move us further from ourselves. Life can seem like a prison if we let it. Keeping us confined to a particular place and set of circumstances. This limit is only the case if you choose to allow it. Or you can choose to be free in your actions and your mind.

Limiting my options is a game I played from early on. Allowing others to put their labels on me and the corresponding limits from the earliest moments in life. “You just aren’t athletic.” “That’s nice, but you will never make a living from it.” “You just aren’t very book smart.” Or one of a million other limiting statements I accepted as crutches and eventually even stopped questioning. Any belief that I have allowed to limit me in any way needed to be reevaluated and changed, even in a small way, because these are the chains that life has put on you, and you won’t eliminate the suffering they cause until you change them.

This reaction is a choice, and it isn’t as difficult as most would have you believe. Change is a constant and inevitable part of life, and you can fight against it or learn to choose to move with it. Ending this limiting suffering is a race between your mental capacities and your biological limitations. Some will win, and some will not. Which side will you be on?

Becoming Your True Self

All people are born with a purpose in life. All of those intentions are positive, and there is some message to bring or a goal to accomplish before our time is done. Unfortunately, we are almost immediately piled with expectations and experiences that push us further from that mission. The programming we receive is mainly in the name of love but delivered in the voice of fear. Parents generally want the best for their children, but often their idea of precisely what the “Best” means can make your choices seem “worst,” even if you are following your heart. Chasing your dreams is your life; nobody else’s.

The suffering that this can cause is lifelong and painful. With each step, a person takes in the direction of someone else’s expectations the further they get from their true self, and soon that person you were born is hidden behind a lot of trees and weeds. It can be challenging to find your way back. The further you have moved from your true essence, the higher the suffering is going to be. It seems like the journey back to who you are is never too far to reach or too late to start looking. The limits we accept are the ones that will affect us. So begin today looking for what message you were born to send and what gift you have to give.

Loss and Suffering

To live life and love others opens you up for the loss, which leads to suffering. If you have lost someone close to you, you know this kind of pain is a painful experience nobody wants to have. But life is a tenuous experience with no guarantees. We never know when the ride will be over should. It is easy to get lost in the routines of the days and take things for granted. Each day is a gift. Open it! Be motivated to do what you want to do, be with those that make you happy, and enjoy every moment.

Not only are the days a gift, but you should take the time to look at the beauty of your day. All the people in our lives are precious too. It is human nature to take things for granted, only realizing how consequential or special someone was when they had left us. Then we mourn the loss. Which is natural, but there is an opportunity every day to celebrate all those in your life, contributing to the experience of living life. It is a short ride, this life, and it makes no sense to spend the bulk of it in misery when you don’t have to. Spend it in appreciation of the magic that is you and your unique presence.

Emotional Rescue

We will all have emotions that bring us down. Anger and fear are natural reactions to life when you start to look at things from the perspective of, “What am I getting out of this?” Then you have to learn to deal with it and either let it consume you or change your thoughts, emotions, and actions to something more positive. I know it sounds natural, and when you feel anger or fear, it isn’t too easy to change. But YOU can modify it by looking at the thoughts causing your suffering and changing them to something else.

Find something or someone who brings out the positive in you. It seems like much of our suffering comes from our feelings of inadequacy, and to change means doing something more worthwhile. Learn what your emotions are telling you and how to change them from negative to positive for you, and you will find a tool to help you end some daily pain nobody needs to deal with in life.

Suffering is a message in life that we are attached to something temporary in a permanent way. Nothing in life is stable, and that is what makes it unique. So the choice is up to you in the end as it always is, spend your time suffering or spend your time in joy. It is all up to you.

“Suffering becomes beautiful when anyone bears great calamities with cheerfulness, not through insensibility but the greatness of mind.” Aristotle

“The reward of suffering is experience.” –Harry S Truman

“Suffering by nature or chance never seems so painful as suffering inflicted on us by the arbitrary will of another.”- Arthur Schopenhauer

“Suffering is but another name for the teaching of experience, which is the parent of instruction and the schoolmaster of life.” Horace

“Suffering is the substance of life and the root of personality, for it is only suffering that makes us persons.” – Miguel de Unamuno

 

 

21

Determined

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Determination-firmness of purpose; resoluteness.

People set out on many journeys in life. Our determination dictates how far the trip is going to take us. All start with calm confidence. All are going to face challenges that will help decide the direction a journey is going to take. Sometimes things get tough, and you can’t continue. The bottom line is that when it comes to your goals and dreams, the determination you carry in your heart is the number one factor in reaching a successful conclusion or not. Resolution is a quality in each of us, and it needs to be used to be effective. It all starts with looking at our thoughts, words, and actions when it comes to completing our goals and seeing the determination we have inside.

Becoming Determined

It takes courage to live a different life that is defined by your personality. Other people will want to push you in different directions that benefit them. You are determined to achieve or become something that will keep you focused on your road ahead and what you need to do to reach your goals. The spring of determination comes from courage. Being brave enough to say no to the things that deter our progress, and yes to the experiences that propel us forward.

Determination is the wake-up call to our humanity. There are experiences we want to have. Usually, these are things we want to accomplish, and we will never accomplish anything until we start in some way, small or big. We are determined to reach a goal or create a dream that pushes us down the road toward the result we seek. Our human soul celebrates and thrives when it has a purpose, a drive, to follow. We can decide which mountains we want to conquer and experience. Without determination, we will never reach the top.

Beliefs Build Determination

When you are trying to accomplish anything to keep your determination moving you in the right direction, you have to feel that you can achieve whatever you are setting out to do. You may think you want to be the best singer in the world, but if deep down you don’t believe that you can, it isn’t going to happen. If you have a belief inside of you that you can become a great singer, then you will have a much stronger determination to accomplish this goal. Whatever you dream of doing, check your beliefs first and see if it resonates with you. Believe you can or change that belief into one that supports your effort.

Beliefs give us the resolve to take action toward making something a reality. They will allow you to establish a neural pattern toward your goals. It will keep you taking steps to let your determination lead to success. You will stay resolute in continuing to practice, work out, learn, or grow in whatever way you need to, to do what you want to do. “If you think you can do a thing or think you can‘t do a thing, you‘re right.” A quote by Henry Ford says it better than I ever could. Believing in yourself and your abilities allows determination in action.

Just Keep Going

When you feel like you have to stop, don’t. When it gets hard, keep going. That is easy to say and hard to do, but that is what determination allows you to do. Find the strength inside of you to keep ongoing. It is through faith in yourself and the promised reward of what your goal is. The determination can be cultivated in anyone, beginning with a focus on the thoughts you entertain, which lead to your beliefs, the words you speak to others, and the actions you will take to get where you want to go. The great thing is that you can become whatever you want if you keep your determination to become whatever you wish.

“Never go backward. Attempt, and do it with all your might. Determination is power” – Charles Simmons

“Do not underestimate the determination of a quiet man” – Iain Duncan Smith

“The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand. “

 

 

 

21

Inner Calm

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In any 24 hours, if you venture out into the world, there will be challenges you will face. The battleground for most of these things is going to be in our heads. I often face challenges to maintain a positive attitude or not to be overwhelmed by a poor perspective of things. Anger is an emotion designed as a warning for us. To make sure we know when something isn’t right, or more precisely, that you are afraid. Afraid that your needs aren’t going to be met by a loss of one form or another. Most often, anger is a waste of time. Moving beyond unhealthy emotions of anger, judgment, greed, or cruelty smoothly, quickly, and healthily can make your life a much more pleasant experience. One of the best things we can do is to create a positive space in our mind; it is a skill that anyone can master if they want to.

Be a Reader, Not a Reactor to Thoughts

Thoughts are occurring in our minds at a rapid pace all day long. You have a choice of which ones you listen to and which ones you let pass you by. It is good practice to start to pay attention to the thoughts you allow to affect you positively and negatively. As humans, we are capable of keeping only one thing in our focus at a time. If you choose to focus on a negative, that will trigger negative emotional responses physically in your body. Once you start to drop down a negative chute of thought, it will focus on itself.

Read the negative thought and notice it, and then let it go and choose a more positive view to focus on. Once accomplished, your body will react, and you will move down a more positive chute. Thoughts build on each other, and a focus develops. Read your thoughts and know where they are taking you. The alternative is to let your dreams run wild and spend your time merely reacting at the mercy of whatever your mind creates. That is how many people live their lives. It leads to wild swings or emotions and unpredictable behavior. Focus on your thoughts and dismiss those that aren’t an accurate representation of who you are and who you want to be. Let them slide by you like flies in the darkness.

Real Focus Develops

One of the best methods to develop a focus on positive thoughts is meditation. Most people picture incense, candles, and chanting when they think of meditating, but that is just a stereotype. Many people practice meditation without knowing it. Whenever you calm your mind and notice your thoughts, you are contemplating. It can be through intense concentration on a task or a conscious effort to notice your breathing. There is a calmness that will take over your mind and body if you stop the mind from running wild and focus on something other than your thought. Thoughts then come to you but are very noticeable as something outside of you.

The peaceful calm that will move over you when you seek calmness will allow you to look deep inside yourself and get to know your true self. Some say that is where your real power exists. Once the thoughts are quiet, a real focus can develop on what you want in your life and what you don’t. Clear goals can materialize, and actual plans for achieving them come into your reality. Focus on the calmness of mediation and see what you can accomplish.

Calmness is a power

There is an ability to bring your inner strength to bear against any challenge you will face the ability to calm your mind at will allows those without this asset to can’t. Inside us all, there is a strength hidden most of the time but can be channeled and used to enable you to thrive and survive when it seems doubtful. Much of our suffering occurs because we desire things to come to us a certain way. Without it, we are in trouble.

But there is the self-confidence that we develop, left to our own devices as children we have it, but time, experience, and the will of others push it down deep. Challenges come in life as a chance to bring them out. Sometimes we fail, are overwhelmed, and never get there. But ………sometimes we do not fail, and we remember the fact that we are strong enough t0 handle what life is throwing our way. Whatever that is, addiction, poverty, or loss. Inside of us is the strength to take it. Finding that strength is helped by developing a calmness about you.

Focus on methods to see the tone and tenor of your thoughts. Look for the ones that make your life a better experience and leave the negative behind. Learning to focus your mind and see what it is doing can allow you to find success and overcome any challenge you face.

“Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.” -Dalai Lama

“Getting stress out of your life takes more than prayer alone. You must take action to make changes and stop doing whatever is causing the stress. You can learn to calm down in the way you handle things.”-Joyce Meyer

“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You have to stop letting them control you.”-Dan Millman

 

21

Lessons of Pain

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Few teachers in my life haveledarning is a gift gotten my attention and held on to it quite like pain. When you are in pain, there is no escaping the message. Pain is a neurological phenomenon that is vital to let us know something is wrong. It could be physically bad or mentally wrong, but either way, pain lets you know that something must change. Without exception, the pain ahas changed me with each visit it has made to my life.

Pain is Temporary; Learning is Forever

Rarely is the anxiety a permanent condition; more often than not, it is a temporary warning sign that something is not quite right. There may be some cases where arrow painchronic pain persists; fortunately, I have never experienced this. Physical pain exists when you hurt your body somehow, and although unpleasant, we can heal it with time, therapy, and treatment. The presence of physical pain has caused you to change your outlook on life and your daily physical activities. This is true of a broken bone or a heart attack. The pain will change you permanently and force you to look for solutions to end it as quickly as possible forever.

Emotional or spiritual pain is something else. It is caused by the experiences we have and how they are registered in the mind. All people have felt heartbreak to some degree or another. It is a mental condition
that causes pain inside your emotional heart. This pain is calling out to be dealt with, but often it is too intense to handle appropriately. Many try to medicate themselves through drugs and alcohol, but when the effect wears off, the pain is still there, seeking to be dealt with in a loving and caring manner. The scars that we leave behind are often major signposts in our lives and dictate our future experiences.

It becomes the fear of the pain, even more than the pain, that dictates our actions to self-medicate or behave poorly to others. Hiding from the pain or preemptively eliminating the opportunity for the pain to affect us. Once fear is faced, it will lose its power over us.

This type of pain has, at times, led to many defining moments in my life. From overcoming monumental losses of love. To appreciate the caring and kindness that others display in their dealings with people. If life went along without pain as a teacher, many experiences wouldn’t carry the message.

The value of relationships might be to understand when they are right and to appreciate those moments. We are not guaranteed anything in life, only the moment we are currently experiencing. Pain allows us to live in this moment and focus on the experience we are in right now. Understanding that it will pass and that you have just taken a vital, although painful step, down the road to wisdom, understanding, and, of course, growth.

buddha-quotes-about-life-buddha-quotes-quotes-pictures-quotes-pictures-updated-daily-34593tumblr_mm72n2XIkL1s9u3jeo1_500Sometimes pain can seem like a friend to some. It allows them to know that they are still alive and can feel. If the loss of any relationship is bothering you, pain can always be the sure connection to the one who has been lost.

I have carried the pain further than I had to to keep the connection. In the end, though, the pain taught its lesson and moved on. I had learned, changed, and in most cases, grown as an individual with a capacity to love more for going through it. Although, as I would also tell you, I wouldn’t recommend the entire experience to anyone. Although pain is a proficient educator, the methodology leaves a lot to be desired.

“Sit with the pain until it passes, and you will be calmer for the next one.”   Naval Ravikant

“Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.”-   Fight Club

“Adversity is the first path to truth.”-  Lord Byron

“One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love.” –  Sophocles

21

My Education

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Education is the process of receiving or giving systematic instruction, especially at a school or university, an enlightening experience.

It is the goal of most people to get an excellent education to reap the highest financial benefit for them during their life. Getting an education is powerful because the more you learn, the more powerful you are in life, and the more you can contribute back to the world. There is a problem with the education one receives today. Although well-meaning, the experience seems useful for those gifted at playing the games of expectation our system puts upon them. But for the majority, education is a minefield of strange expectations and demanding requirements with very little real-world application. It is easy to blame the system; each of us is responsible for the education we get out of life. But that doesn’t have to be the case. When we treat each person like they have potential, all people will rise to that level. Every day is a chance to enhance or diminish it. Start by being conscious of you your thoughts about learning, the emotions those thoughts stir up, the words you use, and the action you take because of those thoughts. That is a rise in consciousness.

All People Have Ability

There are two mindsets in education. One is that each student is either intelligent or not, so they design everything to make intelligent people thrive. The other is the belief that all students have talent and ability and, with the right motivation, and support can achieve anything they want. The keywords are the last three, “anything they want.” This attitude is where the inspiration comes from. That desire comes from becoming more conscious about what you want to learn in life and what you want to do.

There are many online colleges now that have streamlined the system for taking college classes and earning degrees. All of these programs have some merit because increasing your base of knowledge is a good thing. But you don’t need to go into debt to gain the most experience. Desire and read a book to do it. Or start doing the thing you want to do. All people can run their education and should. I know a degree can be a sign of accomplishment and mastery of a subject. But my point is all people can learn, and they can start right now this minute.

The Education Process

I think it is essential to look at education as a process and not simply an accomplishment. The method of education starts when you are born and won’t end until you die. It begins with learning the basics of how to best fit into the social situation that we are born into, but eventually, we want to know more. Start with an interest and follow it to see where it leads you. Learn to learn at every opportunity that life gives you. There is no shortage of information.

Once you start to learn independently and develop a love for figuring things out, your mind grows. It will never shrink again unless affected by a disease. The more knowledge you accumulate, the more you want to add. It doesn’t matter how old you are, where you live, or how much money you have. You are capable of learning anything you want unless you are functioning under some limiting belief.

Limiting Beliefs and Education

If you are thinking negative things about yourself, then they will diminish the knowledge you can attain. Our beliefs develop throughout our development. Whatever opinion or thought of your teachers, peers, family, or society in general that resonated with you will lead to a belief in our subconscious. If you were told and believe you will never be any good at math, guess what? You will probably never be good at math. It is the same for everything. These opinions and thoughts that we adopt for whatever reason control our ability to achieve and learn.

The great thing is that we can remove all of these limits with a bit of work and conscious thought. Stereotypes about the abilities of any group of people are incredibly damaging in this way. They don’t have to be, the individual is the driver of their education curriculum, and nobody can stop them. Decide you want to learn, avoid distractions, and get to it.

Real Education

It doesn’t even take reading a book or taking a class to participate in education. It can be happening all around you in situations you face every day. It would help if you were open to expanding your knowledge base to grow and experience an enlightening moment. Be aware of your thoughts about the way people do things that is different from you. Learn about it, grow as a person, and accept that education happens every day. Look at your thoughts about people and things and pay attention to those trying to educate you. Then gage the feelings you have about the ideas and the actions and words that come to you because of that. Education is an experience, not a destination or possession.

“Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.”- Albert Einstein.

“Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.”- Malcolm X.

“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.”- Nelson Mandela.