Tag Archives: Kindness

21

Do Unto Others

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golden-ruleYesterday, I was reminded how simple our philosophy of life should be. We should all be treating others based on the way we would like to be treated. If we all followed this behavior pattern, it would easily eliminate many of the world’s problems. However, as we all know, sometimes things get in the way of putting the golden rule into practice. Here are a few explanations and thoughts on making sure that you are following the golden rule and doing your part to make sure the world is a better place.

Don’t Take it Personally.

Everyone at some time in their lives has been faced with someone who treats us less than fairly. These instances can be painful, especially when the person who mistreats us is a friend. Yet the truth of the 6a0105360968fe970b0134800cd908970c-500pimatter is that their choices have very little to do with you and everything to do with them. We are all living our lives through the scope of our own experience.

People with a false sense of self can justify their actions through lies or misconception. To other people, you are just a bit player in the grand play of their lives. So don’t take the poor behavior of another as a reflection of your character and honesty.  You can only control your actions and responses to the situations that you are faced with.  Face them with integrity and caring for others. Let kindness and understanding be your guide, and don’t take the poor behavior of others personally.

Be Proactive

One of the best defenses against the toxic behavior of those who do not treat you well is to be proactive in implementing the golden rule in your life. Each day provides opportunities to practice treating img_7910others as you would like to be treated, with kindness, dignity, and respect. These types of things are completely in your control. Rather than waiting for a situation to present itself to you, seek the situation to provide someone else with the good feeling of being treated well.

These are simple things, acts of kindness that don’t have to cost a penny. Kindness and respect are always good and may do more for someone than you know. The choice between good behavior and poor behavior spreads like the ripples of a stone cast in the water. What will the ripples of your behavior contribute to the world? That is your responsibility.

So All we Can Worry About Is Us.

As you evolve in your life experience, there is only one thing that you can control, and that is your own behavior, thoughts, and feelings about the situations you are faced with in life. We choose how we treat others. Are we too busy? Are we kind? Or do we feel too busy and brush other’s simple needs off to pursue our own? Do we act selfishly? These choices belong to us and are what we will be held responsible for when this journey comes to an end.

Following the golden rule will bring you to a place of peace, but most importantly, it will be a light and example to a world that sorely needs it.

 

21

Kindness

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You are responsible for doing this!!
You are responsible for doing this!!

No matter where you are in the journey of life, there will be opportunities today to practice kindness of some sort, which will enhance someone’s experience on Earth in a positive way. If you need any convincing that taking this action will improve the world, then I wanted to provide you with five reasons that kindness is fantastic, and you can be the catalyst for this today, right here, and right now.

Kindness Can Change The World

How the world is viewed is unique to each of us. Kindness allows us to share a positive view of kindness inpiresothers. Simple acts of kindness show others that they aren’t on this journey all alone. We are all in this together. That understanding of the connection that kindness brings can allow someone having a bad day to have a good day.

One small act of kindness can lead to another small act of kindness, which leads to another, and that chain reaction can change the world.

Kindness is Free

All people in the world can afford to practice kindness because it is free. There is no limit on how much you can show in a day either. What kind of world kindness 11would it be if everyone was looking for ways to be kind all through every day? It would be pretty great. Think about that the following situation that you find someone annoying you at work. There is an opportunity for you to practice kindness in thought and deed. Perhaps all that annoying co-worker needs is a kind word from you to turn their day around.  Practice as much as you can because it doesn’t cost a thing.

 Kindness is Contagious

Just as a small pebble can cause an avalanche on a mountainside, one act of kindness can significantly change the world. When you practice your small acts of kindness, they may not seem all that great to you. But when we put all of the small acts of service together, then you have a significant change in the world. Each action, inspiring another and then another until the world is covered in kindness. It certainly beats the alternative.

 Kindness Makes Us Happy

When you are kind to another person, it makes a statement about who you are and what you stand for not only to the world but also to yourself. There are enough things in the world designed to make us feel wrong about who we are. Shouldn’t we try to practice something that makes us feel great about ourselves? To feel happy?

wpid-acts-of-kindness-ripple-4-30-2015There is also some scientific evidence that proves that your brain experiences a chemical reaction that makes you feel better when you are kind. So, true or not, there is no doubt that being the reason someone else smiles today is a good thing, and you can’t debate that. Kindness will make you feel better.

 Kindness Makes Us Easier To Live With

Is it easier to deal with demanding and self-centered or someone looking to do things that make your life better? It is the latter, and kindness provides us with that opportunity all the time. Our relationships will only benefit from the practice of kindness. A supportive comment, a compliment, understanding of a problem, or just a supportive hug can change the energy of those you love and make your relationships stronger. How many relationships could be saved by practicing more kindness? Putting the needs of those you love as a priority and soothing them with kind words and deeds could end many of the fights and misunderstandings that end relationships today. Kindness is never the wrong thing to do.

There you go. If I had more time, I think I could easily add ten more simple benefits of kindness. The bottom line is that thinking of ways to be kind to others will change the experience that you are having in life for the positive. It just involves making the happiness of others a priority. So enjoy your day and make a point to create kind experiences for others and yourself.

Kindness is indeed extraordinary!

21

Silence and Space

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Silence and space are two of the factors that allow all things to exist, but they are there lying in the background of life largely unnoticed, unappreciated, or even unwanted. But without them, we could speak no word, or we could bring creation into existence.  I am taking a moment to appreciate both the silence and space with all of their magical capabilities today.  There is a power in the silence of a moment that many feel we need to fill with some noise to be comfortable. The same can be said for space, and we often go through our days paying no attention to space all around us. We focus on the things that exist, not seeing the opportunities all around them. Let’s focus today on the power of silence and the space in our lives.

Hear the Silence

It is normal to pay attention to the sounds we hear. For example, a voice brings us information, a song that touches our soul, the dialogue in our favorite shows,  or just the sounds all around us. But to focus on the silence all around us makes all of these sounds possible. Pay attention to the quiet and ignore the sounds for just a short time every day.  When you pay attention to the outer silence, you pay attention to the extreme silence. You create an inner silence inside of yourself.  This allows your mind to become still.

By bringing your mind to stillness, you can see and feel everything around you calmly. The outer silence creates the palate for sound to come into being. The inner silence provides a canvas for the clear internal words and noises to be spoken as well. Honest thoughts of value can come to you out of the silence of your mind. The answers to questions asked, the route to find your happiness. Stillness inside starts with paying attention to the silence without. You can’t pay attention to outer silence and not become still inside, and that contains within it the possibilities of all things.

Wide Open Spaces

For anything to come into being, there has to be a space for it to exist. The power and value of a room are not the four walls but the space inside the walls. It is the same for everything and every place else. It is the absence of things that creates the potential of our world. A blank page is an ultimate playground for great.

Do you see an empty room or a room full of potential?

art of all kinds, writing a story, a thought, or drawing a picture. The space we see is the potential for everything to exist. Space itself has no actual existence, but it allows all other things to exist.

Become acutely aware of the space all around you. If you look closely, you will become aware of the space and the feeling of no thinking, which allows all thoughts to come into your head. Look at the nothing in the room and see its potential. You might see the potential in the space inside you as well—space for creation, caring, and kindness.  There is no limit on the number of these things you can create. Like the silence, space is still and infinite in potential. Look for your creations in the space in your life. It can be shaped into what you need or desire to create.

Connections

Both space and silence allow you to calm and silence your thoughts and allow for the things inside you that are a gift to the world to rise to the top and be shared with all. The cap on the bottle can be removed by becoming still with the silence or empty like space. It allows for things to come out hidden by the sounds or lost behind the things that we already are occupied with. Change your focus from the sounds you hear or the things you see to the silence behind the sound and the space surrounding everything in the world.  This observation is a doorway to creativity and understanding yourself.

“Space and silence are two aspects of the same thing. The same no-thing. They are externalization of inner space and inner silence, which is stillness: the infinitely creative womb of all existence.” – Eckhart Tolle. 

“Let silence take you to the core of life.” ― Rumi

“Never say anything that doesn’t improve on silence.” ― Richard Yates

21

Viral Kindness

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Kindness makes the world a better place.  Nobody can argue with that

seek kindness
Seek to give and receive service daily

sentiment. The great thing is that all people can practice being kind every moment, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. It doesn’t cost anything, and the result is always positive.  Why then are so many people not kind?

It is probably due to a focus on the wrong things, but we can always change our direction towards the experience of kindness. People always enjoy receiving compassion from others because it feels good. Performing kind acts for others is just as gratifying.  Kindness is free and is highly contagious. Try spreading some around today.

Make Kindness Go Viral

Now understanding the viral nature of society today, your one simple act of kindness could spread quickly worldwide. Think about it, when

Kindness is contagious
Make Kindness viral

you treat someone with compassion. It makes a person smile and feels good about life. The only thing that feels better than receiving kindness is extending kindness to others.

Think about this, and if you are consciously aware of being kind to three people today, you might start a chain reaction that will spread all over the world. Think that is too much?  Not really. If all three of the people affected by your kindness, extend kindness to three people, and so on, very quickly, your act of goodness may spread everywhere.

Be Brave and Reach for Kindness

We are always seeking kindness but are too afraid to open ourselves up to other people’s kindness.  How many times have you walked by Kindness for allsomeone and not said anything?  Or been sad and could use a hug or a kind word and never told anyone because you were concerned about what others would think?  Perhaps it was because you were worried they would reject you, and it is much easier to be sad or miserable than to risk rejection.

Perhaps it was because you were worried they would reject you, and it is much easier to be sad or miserable than to risk a disappointment from someone else, making life even more depressing. The risk seems gigantic, but all good things come with a portion of risk attached to them. It gives things their value.

 

21

Kindergarten Lessons

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As I move through any day, I am bound to encounter all sorts of behavior, some of it positive and hopeful and some selfish, mean, or hurtful. It always makes me remember that the world would be a much better place if people remember what they learned in Kindergarten and live by them.  For me, Kindergarten happened a very long time ago. Still, I remember the basic lessons I learned and how practicing them today allows my work and personal life to be a much more positive experience. I challenge you to put your own 5-year-old vision on your behavior and experiences and see how you are doing your own behavior and decisions.  The world seems full of people who have forgotten; I am writing this to remind you.

Be Kind

One of the first lessons I learned was that you should be kind to other people. Even though we are all individuals sitting on a mat on the floor, we are all a part of the same society, and we can either make that society better or worse by

kindergarten kindness
In a world where you can be anything, be kind.

practicing kindness or not.  That is a choice, and I learned how good it felt to be kind and to have kindness practiced toward me.

I think that all of those little people I was in class with all felt the same.  The world could use a little of this focus as most people have decided to split the world into an “us” vs. “them” situation.  Even though what constitutes each side differs from the individual, there are too many examples of how poorly we treat each other because of the perception of a difference.  What stops people from seeing the opportunity to practice kindness and understanding rather than anger, fear, and contempt?

Share and Cooperate

Most people seem to be on a mission to collect all the “stuff” they can in life as if the things we possess define who we are.  I don’t remember specifically what the toys were in the kindergarten room I attended, but I do know I learned to share them with my classmates and found that playing with others was far more fun

Sharing is cool!

and enjoyable than having a toy all to yourself.

In fact, when the whole group played a game together, it was the most fun of all.  You didn’t have to be the most athletic or smartest, you just had to try, and the group accepted that effort. If you didn’t, our teacher’s kind and gentle guidance would guide us back to a positive place.  I go to a gym most days and see many people there, most practice cooperation and understand that you need to share equipment and wait your turn for some things.  Some obviously have never understood the concept of being considerate of others.  I find myself wanting to explain to them in clear terms about the concepts of sharing, taking turns, and empathetic to others.  Though if they have come this far in life being self-centered and insensitive, their life experience made them forget kindergarten lessons. I feel sorry for them. Life must have been very difficult for them indeed.

Take Turns and Work Together

When you are five years old, your problems are far less complex than as an adult; however, dealing with a challenge is a skill that will determine the success or failure of many ventures.  Everything in the kindergarten classroom was designed to build this concept in each of us. We took turns being first in line to maneuver around the school. We took turns doing daily chores.  We shared cleaning

One of my favorite toys when I was 5. I would share it with you for sure.

responsibilities and we did them together.

I encounter many people today in all areas of life who seem to have concern only for themselves, their experiences, and that everyone does things their way or wrong.  At the highest levels of government, this seems to be the norm in the United States today.  Rather than cooperate for the good of all people, politicians are more concerned with being “right” rather than doing what is clearly right. What is right are the things that help people live a healthy, happy, and safe life. Kindergarten teaches this; unfortunately, as life has given us challenges, we have been hurt and turned away from these positive lessons and moved toward the perceived safety of isolation.

What You Can Control

One of my favorite activities during the day in kindergarten that I remember is the weatherboard. We would sit in front of a felt

Weather time!!

board with two images on it, and our wonderful teacher would call on us and allow us to put a piece of clothing that would be appropriate for the weather on that day.  Growing up in Greenville, Maine, there were many winter jackets, hats, and mittens.  It taught you to dress for the weather and that some things in the world are out of your control.

Even though there are things that are out of our control, we have the ability to react to these things any way we choose. We can be angry about it, or sad, or happy, but no matter how we choose to feel, the weather was still cold, or rainy or snowy, or not snowy enough.  What we can do is dress appropriately and do the best we can.  It is a lesson that I have needed to remember throughout my life.  Things happen which I can’t control, and all I can do is react in a way that will be true to who I am.  If you can master this skill, then you will enjoy your life a lot more.  Too often, we spend too much time complaining about the weather rather than reacting positively to the weather and all things that are happening out of our control.

In the End

Kindergarten is a year in your life usually happening when you are five years old, and if you paid attention, the lessons there could guide you through life.  The developmentally appropriate

I am not sure who’s kindergarten class this was but I hope they paid attention.

learning is designed to allow a child to build social and academic skills which will allow them to fit into the school system.  My challenge to you is when you move through your day, encounter the people you do, and experience things of all kinds. Regardless of your current age, you remember what you learned all those years ago in kindergarten and practice it with everyone you come in contact with.  Be kind when you can, share and work together,  enjoy the people in your life and understand letting things you can not control determine your mood is unhealthy.  Most of all, if you remember your kindergarten lessons, you will have a much happier life and be a better person.

“The Universe is one great kindergarten for man. Everything that exists has brought with it its own peculiar lesson.”- Orison Swett Marden

“The kindergarten children are confident in spirit, infinite in resources, and eager to learn. Everything is still possible.” Robert Fulghum

 

21

What If

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What If…….

what-ifThere are questions we ask ourselves all of our lives that can haunt us if we let them. What if that decision was wrong? What if I shouldn’t have done that? What if I had tried out for the chess team in high school? What if I said yes?

There are a million of these questions that can consume your time. Still, they don’t add up to anything in the end because the fact is whatever you are “what if-ing” about didn’t happen, will never happen, and so should concern you about as much as what the weather was in Borneo in the year 1656.

There are many other what-ifs you can worry about that could make a difference in the world, and I think I would instead focus on those.

What if ………..

kind wordsOne kind word from you could make someone else’s day or even save their life. You never know the storm that is brewing underneath the surface of anyone.

Their surface smile could be hiding a storm of emotions below.  One kind word or gesture could be the human contact they needed to keep moving forward. There are many words we let slide with no thought or regard for their destination and potential impact. Speak as if your words could save a life. What if that were so?

What if………….

gratefulInstead of thinking about the things we don’t have, we spent time being grateful for the things we do have. I have seen people make gratitude lists, and it changes the way they look at the world. Gratitude has the power to transform the way you feel about things.

They do not have to be monumental, giant things, be thankful for the little things.  Being alive, a peanut butter sandwich, coffee, or whatever little things bring you comfort and joy throughout your day.  In most philosophies, gratitude is the key to abundance. What if we all were a bit more grateful?

What if………….

Bring down the barriers that enslave us all freedom is priceless to all creaturesThere were no separations between people. That means that nobody grouped anybody. Instead of being sectioned off because of your age, nationality, economic status, or color of your skin, recognize we are all members of one group, human beings.

When you look for differences among people, you find separation. Separation is the first step toward discrimination because it creates us vs. them mentality. The smaller the circle of us becomes, the more likely we are to have a problem.

This is true for any conflict of every size, including the race riots of the 1960s to economic conflicts of today. What if there were no separations between people, just people?

What if………….

governmentThe people who were elected to represent the people represented the well-being of the people.  In the United States, the government and big business have become synonymous in a definition.

What if that wasn’t the case, and they were focused on helping people who live here as much as they are concerned about helping themselves.

Should any person in our country be hungry? Should any person have to fear suffering from domestic violence? Is there any good reason that the educational system is broken beyond repair? Children treated with kindness and hope would change the world.   What if we had a representative government that represented the people and not big business?

What if………..

urlPeople spent more time using the most potent force in the universe, love. Instead of choosing to participate in activities like gossip, discrimination, judgments of others, or worrying about what is in it for me?  Imagine spending their time focusing on understanding, kindness, acceptance, and what they can do for others.

How different would the lives of every person be if they spent all of their effort on spreading loving-kindness? Hatred can only be defeated by love, not more hate. What if people spent more time thinking and acting with respect?

What if it is a question that we can ask all of the time? Some inquiries can be used to hold us back or be used as a catalyst to find the best in ourselves and others.  

 

 

 

21

Smiling

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  What makes you smile?    

Smiling is my favorite
Mine Too!

I have always felt that the endgame in life was to experience happiness, and one of the ways that we show this is to smile. Smiling shows an appreciation for whatever is unfolding in your life.

There are many different smiles we share with the world, and I am here telling you that there are so many things that make me smile. I am not sure that I can mention them all here. I am trying to encourage others to smile and feel a bit more positive about life.

Good Things Make Me Smile

You are a good thing that makes me smile.
You are a good thing that makes me smile.

This is a generic way to say that I encounter many good things daily in the course of my life. Some are natural and don’t involve other people at all.

 Like the way, a sunlit morning looks on the trees or reflects off the water and tells me that life is moving and happening all around.  One look at the sheer space that a big, blue sky has to offer, and a smile has to come to your face.

 Look at the configuration, and if there are clouds, you are looking at a configuration that has never existed before and never will again.  That is reality, and that makes me smile.

People provide a lot of good things to smile about as well. A friendly wave, comment, or “how ya doin’?” are enough reason to smile.

 In these transactions, I can tell you for sure that the more smiles you share, the more you will see on the faces of others. Good things, a warm and delicious meal, a perfect glass of iced tea, perfectly constructed mac and cheese, all will bring a smile to my face because they are all good things that warm your heart and make you feel good about being alive. 

Kindness Makes me Smile.

be with who makes you happyThere is nothing more important in bringing a smile to my face than kindness. It can be the act of being kind to someone else, or it can be the gift of receiving someone else’s kindness.

 Try it sometime. Do something kind for someone, with no regard for yourself and what you will receive, and you will find a smile appear uncontrollably on your lips.  It is the same when you are the beneficiary of kindness, and smiles are the natural result.

Often when I notice how unhappy some people are, I wonder when the last time a transaction of kindness had entered into their life.

 It must have been some time if they are that unhappy about life.  Perhaps we need to make kindness a mandatory activity in our society.  Who could be against that?  Thinking about making a law about kindness makes me smile, apparently.

Memories Make Me Smile

one thing each day that makes you smileI have memories that sometimes I like to recall, and they make me smile as I remember the people and events that have positively touched my life.

Some are funny; some are just goofy, some were serious, some involved love, some involve friends, and some involve family.  All the “good” and “bad” in all of these relationships and memories combine today to make me smile as I reach into the past with my mind.

One of the great gifts our imaginations give us is the ability to reach out and touch these things at the drop of a hat.  To be with that person you haven’t seen for over 25 years or go back to that place halfway across the country or even the world.

  There are happy memories of special times spent with special people recalled and bring a smile to your face. It could be as simple as the food from a Pizza Joint or a local diner.

The smile is for the experience. Even though it is long gone, the love for the moment and the other people in it nonetheless are worthy of a  smile.

“Good” Entertainment

Stewie makes me smile.
Stewie makes me smile.

This is a completely subjective thing because what I think is good, you may cringe at, but the fact remains that good entertainment makes me smile. This covers everything you do yourself, like reading books, enjoying the artwork of others, and all things in between.

 There are jokes, and there are quips. There is the sheer beauty of a mind that you can observe and appreciate.  Who hasn’t laughed out loud at a television program or the circumstances portrayed in the pages of a book?

If you have never laughed out loud or smiled uncontrollably due to the art around you, then you need to reevaluate your activities.  In the last week, I have smiled because of television shows, music, art, writing, and the Boston Red Sox, to name a few.  There seems always to be a reason to smile if you look for it.

Smile all the While

Whatever it is that makes you smile and share your happiness and good nature with others, you should really start to spend more time doing these things.

There is no shortage of faces in the world, seemingly angry and upset about everything.  Smile at them because there are few times in life that your smile won’t make someone else’s day a whole lot brighter.  So the only thing left to know is……………..

What makes you smile?

Look around you every day and see there are always things to smile about. Simple things from freedom of movement, choice of activity, time spent with special people, a perfect sky, a new shirt, an old shirt, love, something that matters, fun for the sake of it, a new adventure, a favorite activity, seeing someone be successful, experiencing something for the first time, appreciating it may be the last time, a great meal,  any of the things we shouldn’t take for granted. Whatever it is in your soul that makes you smile today, do it and share your smile with the world.

21

Kindness

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2664d0e2789d58be9784c145b6b47963It is in our nature to judge others. We do it naturally, judging someone else’s behavior, actions, motives, or past. It is a biological need to do this because it will help protect you from harmful situations and people, and of course, this is important to your survival.

It really jumps out at you when you observe people being judgmental about the behavior of others. It seems that today the judgments of others are high, and the reactions to others are based on blind judgment and hate. It stands out and makes you wonder why it is that way. When you judge someone else in this manner, you define yourself, not them. I think it is important to remember this.

Judgments are Easy

It is easy to look at one action a person takes and judge their entire lives judgment 2because of it. The deed may be terrible and unforgivable, but does that void all the good that they might have done in their life? What were the circumstances that led to this event?  It is effortless to judge the behavior of others in a vacuum devoid of all the facts.  This is being done all the time, and most of these judgments lead to hate. It is important to remember that we are all human beings with an equal disposition for both darkness and light, and it is our experiences, intentions, and choices that move us toward one or the other.

When facts are learned and the whole story is revealed, humanity is often revealed by people that can be understood. Understanding is not acceptance; it knows that faced with different circumstances, you might make such a poor choice yourself and there but for the good fortune of your life, go you.  You can judge all of our lives in a vacuum, and you can be made to look insensitive, cold, and uncaring. It is a matter of perspective.

Acceptance Is The Cure

The opposite of judgment is acceptance. This does not mean that you agree with everything a person does regardless of morality. It means that imagesyou can accept that people make mistakes, do mean things, cheat, lie, or commit any number of sins in their lives.  Acceptance means that we understand that we ourselves have made poor decisions at times, and none of us want to be defined by our worst moments.

Each person has a moment in their life that is unquestionably positive. These actions and events have made the world a better place in even just the smallest of ways. It is up to each of us to show kindness to others as best we can. Show compassion and understanding to people who need it so that they will do the same when they have the opportunity.  You do not have to condone someone’s behavior to show compassion and acceptance of their humanity.

You have to have a little kindness in your heart.

“It is with our judgments as with our watches: no two go just alike, yet each believes his own.”   Alexander Pope

“Hesitancy in judgment is the only true mark of the thinker.”  Dagobert D. Runes

“In our judgment of human transactions, the law of optics is reversed. We see most dimly the objects which are close around us.”  Richard Whately

“One cool judgment is worth a thousand hasty councils. The thing is to supply light and not heat.”Woodrow Wilson

“Men are often biased in their judgment on account of their sympathy and their interests.”

21

Challenges

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What would your life look like if you were more positive in your thoughts?

challengesNo matter how confident and successful you are, life has a way of throwing challenges at you that will push you to make decisions redefining who you are and your substance.  In everyone’s life, there will be events that force a constant expression of this experience and force you to take actions that will bring growth in your life.

In the end, even after facing a challenge,  I like to think that we have found a more galvanized understanding of who we are, and we hold on to this self-image with a more critical and realistic passion. Sometimes the challenges are so overwhelming that it takes quite a bit of time to find your equilibrium and look at things with a more open mind and accepting heart.  Will you find positivity at the end of a challenge in life? Only you can tell that for yourself. I have always thought I would. But recently, my life has taught me many things from challenges. I have experience loss, betrayal, poor judgment and found a perspective of forgiveness and, hopefully, positive growth in all areas of my life because of it.

Being Positive, When the World is Negative

Even though I have spent a lot of time learning about the power of being positive, I know positive thoughts produce positive energy. I have, on positive_redcoccasion, slipped into being judgmental and critical of others for no reason other than because I was experiencing something negative. When you are experiencing fear of any kind and are afraid of your needs not met, this can happen.

Being positive becomes difficult when you look at life and the people in it as things that affect you, rather than seeing them as people who are just doing the best they can to survive day-to-day.  All people have weaknesses, and from time to time, they are annoying and rub you the wrong way.  One of the biggest challenges in life is accepting these negatives and still supporting and highlighting the positives of every individual in your life. The things that annoy us the most are the weaknesses we see in ourselves. We are maintaining a focus on love, understanding, acceptance, and kindness, which can be a challenge, and the reward in accepting others is a better view of ourselves.

It becomes challenging to do this when an atmosphere of negativity engulfs you, focusing on the negative features of things like judgment, sarcasm, and just being plain mean.  That is when you have to work a bit harder to find the positives.  The best way that I have found is to look for the things that are going right and not worry about what is wrong with the job, community, or each other. Especially each other. 

Find Time For You

No matter how busy you think you are or what others believe you should be doing, it would help if you found time dedicated to yourself.  Scheduling this can be a challenge, but vital to allowing person la growth. Rather than get all wrapped up in the daily chores, problems to be solved, and performance, find time for you. Don’t lose your focus on pure kindness and courtesy; people should show one another each day.

One of my favorite ways to maintain a more positive focus is to spend a little time each day learning something new and digesting that information productively and healthily. You are never too old to learn, and growth is a lifelong process.  Learning about yourself makes you less judgmental of others and keeps the focus where it belongs, on your thoughts and ideas. Those who don’t find growth are slowly dying. Finding time to think and put your experiences into perspective will allow your life to have a much more significant flavor. Life is continually trying to teach you lessons. Your reflection is their chance to sink in and make an impact.

Focus Your Energy

All experiences are going to change your life in one way or another.  People often choose to let most of what happens to them be negative and spend time trying to overcome whatever life has given them.

focus expandsI think there is a better way, and that is to remove the labels of good or bad that are associated with experiences and label them all “Experiences.”  Changing our perspective can be difficult when things are personal, but in reality, everything that happens is just an experience that brings something to our lives that we apply value to, good or bad.  We choose to smile and take what we can or to frown and feel overwhelmed by things happening to us. We have a choice.

The choices we make in each moment will determine the path of our day, and our days discover the way of our lives. There are many great things in life we all experience each day, from pleasant weather to a good cup of coffee. We need to notice and appreciate them.  Being grateful for the positives in life will always take the focus and power away from the negatives.

What if you decided to accept everything that happens to you as if you chose it? 

What you spend your time and effort focusing on in your life will increase.

“Keep your face to the sunshine, and you cannot see a shadow.” — Helen Keller.

“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.” — Willie Nelson.

“Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose.” — Lyndon B. Johnson.

“In order to carry a positive action, we must develop here a positive vision.” 

 

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!!!!

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The Happiness Choice

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Why Don’t we all choose Happiness?

Happiness is a goal that everyone wants to experience. How many times have you just wanted to be a5c051b4717d998bbf35faca2927241chappy with life, your choices, the people that you know, and the things that you own? Yet, there is a deep feeling of angst inside that what you have and what you are is not enough. You would be happier if you were taller, thinner, had a more beautiful car, or a more interesting significant other. The real source of happiness is within you.

The Difficulty with Things

One of the reasons that everyone isn’t happy is that they depend on things to make them so.  If you need something to happen or something to own to make you happy, then you are in trouble. What is going to happen if that thing is taken away from you?  Or it might never occur, so you will run the risk of having your happiness stolen or never happen at all because you are dependent on some exterior force to provide you with the feeling of joy.

Happiness is nothing more than a choice. Although it is unrealistic to expect everybody to be happy all the time, it is a personal choice to decide if you are comfortable at any given moment or not. Only you can make that decision for yourself.

What Makes YOU Happy?

choosing to be happy
Your choice

What makes you happy? Money, property, things?   Or do you look for love, friendship, meaning, kindness?

It is all up to your choices to look for something to be happy about or, conversely, to be unhappy.  There is always a reason, and it depends on where you focus on how emotions and feelings will go.

Often the problem isn’t with other people but with you because you have such a small list of things to be happy about and such a long list of things to be angry or unhappy about that it is challenging to be grateful for the great things that you do have.

You can change your outlook simply by adjusting thoughts you focus on, like the good things in your life.  All negative thinking, emotions, and ideas of an unhappy nature stem from fear, whereas all happy or positive emotions stem from love.

When you look at the things that make you happy, they always stem from some form of loving emotion, and when you are unhappy, you are focusing on some fear-based foolishness.

Fear Makes You Unhappy

It is important to remember that if you are happy now,  not everyone will be pleased because too many people are focusing on fear.  They find your happiness almost an insult to them. Since misery loves the company, they are often not satisfied being unhappy by themselves. They feel the need to make you miserable too, and everyone else comes in contact with them.

But these energy drains don’t have to be a pain in your life. Understand that your choices and experiences result from what you decide to focus on and nothing else.

It would be a much better world if the things that made you happy could make everyone happy, but that is not your responsibility or job. You can only manage your own experience and determine if you will have happiness or misery in your day. Nobody else is responsible, and you are not responsible for anyone else’s happiness. It is impossible.

I believe that when we do the things that make us shine, we will bring happiness to others.  In a world full of self-centered, egotistical people, that is the best you can do to find one real connection.

We only have one chance in life to live, create greatness, make mistakes, learn our lessons and decide to get better as a person or allowing the perceived weight of our shortcomings to weigh us down.  Happiness is there for us if we choose to carry it with us. Joy is found in the memories of loved ones, here now and passed on. Or in the smile of someone who likes spending time with you.  Every person has a heart capable of creating unlimited happiness.