Tag Archives: values

Building a Mindset

I heard once it is possible that of the more than 7 billion people on this planet, most will live out the entirety of their life and never contemplate anything deep or thoughtful about their existence before they die. It makes me think everyone should spend a little time each day considering their cosmic presence.

But maybe life is more comfortable, not considering the meaning of things. Thoughts about how you look at life and why we are here develop around our mindset. Recently I read the book Mindset by Carol S. Dweck. She discusses the two significant attitudes that exist, the growth mindset and the fixed mindset. Excellent thought for how you approach life, learning, and success presents here, and it would be worth your while to take the time to read through this one.

Know Your Fixed Mind

The bottom line is most people pull from both sides of this spectrum, having characteristics of each mindset, depending on the situation. First is the fixed mindset. The belief that you have the talent to do something or you don’t. Much of your self-esteem builds by results, rankings, and the ease with which something is accomplished. Challenges are avoided, and change is not welcome. In a fixed mindset, people focus on limiting you and often feel helpless when needing to change a situation. Criticism is seen as a personal attack, and they rarely leave their comfort zone. Most important, though, is the fixed mindset that thinks putting effort into something is a waste, and they rarely seek to learn new things.

I would be harder on this mindset, but I have practiced it for large parts of my life in many areas. We worry more about appearances than what would make us happier, better, or contribute significantly to the world. Beginning to recognize the fixed mindset in me has allowed me to step beyond it and look for ways to become better. Fear is behind the fixed mindset of not being accepted as who we are. Fear of not being perfect. Fear of experiencing failure. That is what happens when we let the results define our lives and provide our value. The narrow, limiting view of the fixed mindset, driven by fear, is how many live their lives. I hope to leave doubt far behind me.

Step Into Your Growth Mindset

If you look at your life, the moments when you felt the best about yourself and your accomplishments probably came from practicing the growth mindset. We welcome challenges in this frame of mind because we see their ability to help us become better and wiser and contribute more. We embrace change as an inevitable part of life. Continually seek opportunities to build. The thought is that anything is possible with the right plan, consistent practice, and maximum effort. Growth mindset, people, see learning and constructive criticism as something to be desired and sought out. New things are pleasant, and they love exploring them.

There is a lesson that will lead to your ultimate success in every failure if you take the time to learn about it. Rather than being afraid of not knowing, these people see challenges as an excellent opportunity to become better at whatever they are diving into. In a typical school, the growth mindset is not encouraged or recognized. Becoming better or growing should be life’s number one goal because growth brings purpose, fun, and interest and allows the best version of yourself to rise to the surface.

Building the Growth Mindset

Look at yourself and how you approach new things. Are you afraid to fail? Do you worry so much about what others think you limit yourself, give a half-hearted effort, or see failing as the worst thing possible? If you do, you are operating from a fixed mindset. We all tend to have a limited and growth-oriented mindset, depending on what area of life we live in. In some ways, we might be fearless and growth-oriented, and in others, we can be fearful and operating c

“Amid winter, I found there was within me an invincible summer. And that makes me happy. For it says, no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within, there’s something stronger- something better, pushing right back.”

“Every mistake you make is progress toward accomplishment.”

 

Following Your Compass

When you stop and look at where you are in your life and the people you are currently involved with, the biggest factor determining all of this is the values you follow and adhere to in your life. As the late great Zig Ziglar said;

“You are who you are and what you are because of what has gone into your mind. You can change who you are and what you are by changing what goes into your mind.”

Our own personal system of values determines the mode of input for all of us.  For every problem I have faced or challenges that arose, the success I have had with it has stemmed from the character I displayed through my values. There have been times in life where my value system was a little murky. That led to questionable behavior and less than ideal results.  That is the compass we all follow, which leads us to the destination in our lives. Where is your compass leading you? Where would you like it to take you?  Your values will reveal these answers. It is as simple as that.

Values

What are your values? A value is a person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.  They can be positive or negative or anywhere along thatscontinuum. When I look at myself, Honesty, integrity, compassion, work ethic, independence, learning, kindness, and reliability are all positive values I apply to my behavior.  Since I have placed my focus on these things, life flows quite easily in that direction.

Your behavior is the true measure of your values. If you take what isn’t yours, you are not honest. If you bully someone else into making yourself feel better, then you are a bully. If you have no compassion for those in difficult situations, that tells everything about your life. Values will color all of your experiences with the brush of those questionable values. And when you are sitting there in anger and frustration because things are not working out for you, you have no one to blame but yourself and the negative values you have adopted.

If you don’t like your life, start by changing the values you focus on and practice.

Where Values Come From 

As little humans, we are each trying to figure out what this world is all about from the moment we are born. We are continually taking in information based on the behaviors and reactions of all the people we contact.  This stage lasts the first seven years of life, and during that time, our moral compass is passed on to us by the observed behavior and direct experience with others. Parental figures are the biggest influence, but so is everyone else you come in contact with.

We do not realize it at first, and some never realize it, but we are all responsible for our choices in life and the values we practice in all situations.  Just because we were born into a situation where poor values were practiced is not an excuse. You decide for yourself where your ethics and morality lie. If you choose to be unethical, you are responsible for that and the things which result from that effort.

Your Compass Bearings

When we look at the trajectory of our lives, it is easy to blame others, bad luck, the government, nature, or any factor that exists. Many of the things outside us we have no control over.  We can control the decisions we make around the values and morals we prioritize in our lives.  Our compass bearings are created from this.  There is no more accurate predictor of where that compass is going to take someone than personal values.

We are wholly responsible for the outcomes of our lives, and the more we take that, the better your life experience will seem. Life seems to bring us to the places we show appreciation for, and we show this appreciation through our values and the importance we place on them.

Today is a great time to reflect on your personal system of values and seek places you would like to tweak them in a direction in line with your ideal self. You will define this one way or another.  Please pay attention to the bearings of your compass of values and what they are telling you about life.

Some quotes on Values:

“When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier.” Roy E. Disney

 “Our value is the sum of our values.” Joe Batten

 “If you don’t stick to your values when they are being tested, they’re not values, they’re hobbies.” Job Stewart

“Good moral values are mostly molded from a place where love, faith, and hope exist.” Arsenio V. Manalo Jr