Tag Archives: jonathan hilton

21

Carpe Diem

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At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

Carpe Diem Jonathan Hilton
Today is the day.

I have felt most passionate and alive right now, and there is nothing that could top this moment in time until tomorrow!

Many people will look far into the distant past for this answer or maybe dream of a day in the future that might be more perfect, but to me, right here and right now is the place where I feel most passionate and alive.

Get More Passionate Right Now

There is really no other way to be, is there? If you are not passionate and alive today, then it is time to make some changes and get more passionate about the life you are living.  As I am right now looking out the window and seeing the bright light of the early morning start to defeat the darkness of the night, I can only think about the

need a change jonathan hilton
Sometimes we all do!

possibilities that today contains in it.

I can’t wait to find out what is coming.  Is it good? Is it bad? We will see, but the experience of today has never happened before, ever!

It is amazing how many people can just let an opportunity to enjoy life slip past them and treat today like a carbon copy of Tuesday of last week when there is absolutely no such thing.

Enjoying the difference is what allows your life to grow and change in big ways.

Someday never Comes

I think it is a huge mistake to think that it is OK to suffer and be a little unhappy today because tomorrow will be better and bring me what I want, need, or desire.

Tomorrow may never come, and once you start making excuses about chasing your passion, you may do it for the rest of your life, living for the hope that tomorrow you will have the courage to change.

I know that there is no better opportunity than today.  What makes you feel alive is the belief and ability to live your life with the hope that you will achieve your goal and take one small action step that will lead to you finding it.

Choose to Live With Passion

Feeling alive should be a part of every morning because if you aren’t feeling this way or

feeling passionate and alive jonathan hilton
Be like Nike

you find life too much of a drag, and it saps you of the positive feelings life gives you.

If you don’t like how you feel about things, then it is time to stop doing them. Choose to do something else that feels better to you.

This sounds really simplistic, but honestly, ask yourself how often you have chosen to be unhappy, chosen to be dissatisfied, chosen to be afraid, chosen to go with the flow.

Find your passion and choose to follow it, and each day will allow you to feel the most passionate and alive than you have felt in your life.

I know for sure that I have this moment in life to make the best of that I can, whatever that may involve, and that is all I can really be concerned with, yesterday is gone, and I can’t get it back tomorrow may never come.

See a Little Light

 

 

21

Anger

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For those who like spelling!
For those who like spelling!

I was faced with today’s question of whether or not anger is a bad thing or a good thing. I believe that anger is one of the emotions that you should avoid because it is one of the emotions that stem from fear.  However, being the open-minded person that I am, I am willing to look at the emotion of anger from a neutral standpoint and decide once and for all if it is desirable to be angry or not.

Anger is just Anger

I am the first to admit that anger in and of itself is not a bad thing or a good thing. It is just a thing.  We all experience the emotion of anger because we are human. But, it is how we deal with that emotion that I think is important.  So, where your anger takes you in your thoughts, words and actions will determine whether that experience is productive or not.  This determines if it is good or bad for you.

Is anger Good?

Happiness is better than anger.
Happiness is better than anger.

There are some good things to anger.  The emotion itself exists to let us know when someone or something is hurting us or our needs are just not being met. It acts much like a smoke detector, warning of potential danger.   The positive possibilities exist when you look at the anger and understand why you feel this way.  Dealing with these emotions positively and discussing them with the people close to you allows you to work on that warning sign, and the next time it will bother you less.

Anger Problems

It’s not the anger that is the problem. Poor management of anger is the problem. If you are prone to angry outbursts, then you know that anger is more often than not going to entice you to say or do something that you will be apologizing later for.

Anger causes you to react from emotion and act quickly, without really thinking, and those results are usually bad.  But more importantly, I believe it is important to recognize where that anger is taking you.  If, for example, anger makes you physically violent, then that is wrong, and it is always wrong.  That is the most dramatic case, and most people would agree that it is never OK to commit physical violence no matter what someone does to make you mad.

tumblr_mdfkwiHmPt1rzcaajo1_500Everyone knows someone who has an anger management problem, and they are not pleasant people to be around.  You live your life walking on the edge of a volcano, with no idea when it might explode, spewing hot lava all over you.  I have also been fortunate enough to interact with people who use their anger as a push to understand themselves.

We should apply the same filter to other reactions which result from anger.  Much like the action to hit, push or slap a problem away from you because it hurt you, a person can react just as thoughtlessly by adding hate, revenge, or jealousy to the problem.  This would be a great example of how to turn the emotion of anger into something terrible.

Anger leads to Revenge, hatred, and jealousy, to name a few.

Negative thoughts that we entertain are going to affect our lives negatively.  Whether you believe in karma, quantum physics, or Christianity, hate is not an acceptable thought or behavior, and nothing good ever came from revenge, hatred, or jealousy.  They are nothing more than a person’s effort to “payback” someone or something that hurt them or didn’t fulfill a need.  So allowing this anger to churn inside you and spin out these other negative thoughts and actions will harm your existence.

Hating someone because of something they did to you or someone else is the same thing as hating yourself. We all have the ability to commit great evil and to show tremendous love.  How can you hate someone else for acting exactly like you are capable of?  You never have to like what they do or accept it.  Deplore the act, but forgive the person responsible because it is only through forgiveness that you can find peace.

Revenge will Get You Nowhere.

The same can be said for revenge. When someone hurts you, the most natural response is to want to hurt them back in any way you can.  Through name-calling, disparaging comments, or actions that you know will cause pain.  You can find revenge, but it will not make you a better person.  Anger is the hot rock that burns the one that holds it.  To hold a grudge, or obsess about paying someone back, is only going to stop you from moving forward.  The past

All emotions are ok, it is our reaction to them that causes problems.
All emotions are ok; it is our reaction to them that causes problems.

It is gone, it is over, and no matter how much punishment your hurt feelings get you to implement, you can’t change the act that hurt you.  This thought pattern will stop you from letting it go and move forward.

Jealousy is a Monster

Anger often is turned into jealousy about careers, love, or even possessions.  There is nothing positive about this emotion.  Jealousy is selfish and can turn one of the best experiences in life, love and turn it into a controlling, manipulative relationship.  Most of this comes from anger that you either ignore and are a slave to in your reaction to it.

These are just three negative emotions that stem from not positively handling your anger.  My experience with each of these has been inclusively negative in every way imaginable.  Jealousy stems from anger fed by insecurity. Revenge is a reaction to make someone else recognize and understand the hurt you are feeling, and hate is an emotion that has no positive aspect to it at all.

Forgiveness is Final

There is no reason to beat yourself up or think you are a bad person if you experience anger because we are all humans, and we all experience anger.  Gandhi experienced anger, but he didn’t let it consume him. He believed you had to forgive those who wronged you or the things that happened to you.  Once you let them go, they no longer have any power over you, and you can freely move on with your life.  Much like a giant burden is taken off of your back.

In conclusion, Anger is an emotion that is neither good nor bad; it is an inevitable piece of being a human being, stemming from being hurt or not having your needs met.  How you deal with anger and what you let it manifest into in your thoughts, words and deeds are where we can recognize anger as either positive or negative.

 

21

What I Like About People

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What is the most desirable trait another person can possess?

What_I_Like_About_You_title_cardI think it is impossible to pick one trait another person can possess. So many factors contribute to a personality and allow you to get to know someone in a real and genuine way. So many people I have met don’t show you their true selves anyway because you would stay far away if they did.

 To narrow the multitude of traits to one would be much too difficult to do in the short time I have to write this to give five traits I think are desirable in others.  I could probably come up with twenty without working too hard, but the list of five will have to do. I am sure they are easy to find.

Be  Positive Or Go Home

Many people spend so much time worrying about the things they don’t have that they miss out on all of the great things right in front of them. The great thing 05d3a5f9a3a2203c98679a3a91b88b66is that this behavior is all choice.

 It is raining out.  One person complains incessantly and lets it ruin their day and everyone around them.  The other looks at it as a great opportunity to wear that colorful raincoat and those new rain boots.

 Being positive is a state of mind, and the negative person is always a chore to spend time with.  Being with a positive person makes the time fly by because it is enjoyable no matter what happens.

 Life is only going to give you a finite collection of experiences, and it is your decision if you want not to enjoy them.  I prefer to enjoy each of them to the best of my ability, and positive people make that happen. So you really have to choose your company well. If someone does not see the positive, think about finding someone who will.

Honesty Is The Best Policy

There are few people in the world that you can trust to be honest about important things. That doesn’t mean little white lies should always be frowned on because Honesty 22sometimes people don’t need to know your opinion. However, open and honest communication must build any type of relationship, romantic or friendship.

 The big things have to be dealt with honestly.  From your hopes and dreams to financial matters, honesty is not only the best policy but the only policy I think leads to long-term success in building a relationship that will last longer than a short six months.

Just because you haven’t been “caught” in a lie, once you lie, the relationship changes; usually, you are lying because you are hiding something. Whatever that is. Something you did or something about yourself: dishonesty is a hurtful, painful thing to impose on someone you theoretically care about.

 Once you start hiding things from someone you love, the list of things you are hiding will continue to grow.  Soon you won’t be able to remember which things you should be hiding.

When the truth comes out, and it will eventually, no explanation can work. So always be honest, stop doing things that you would have to lie about, and be much happier. But, more importantly, so will all the people in your life.

Laughing with Me Not At Me

222333Being able to laugh at life and, more specifically, at my sense of humor is one trait I look for. In addition, I enjoy laughing and sharing a laugh with someone else.

There is no way you can do that with someone sober in thought all the time.  Laughter is the best medicine for almost any problem.

 Some believe that laughter can lower your blood pressure and help you lose weight.  All I know is that laughter makes you happy and makes you feel good. Have you ever been mad when you have laughed uncontrollably? Of course not.  There is nothing to do but appreciate the humor of the situation.

 There are only so many moments in life, and it seems like we shouldn’t waste the funny ones spending time with people who have little to no sense of humor. Or spend too much time worrying about themselves to see the joy in many moments. So I don’t judge them, I prefer to leave them sitting in a quiet, dark house, and I will enjoy the laughter that comes naturally with life.

The Smart Choice

beauty-9Intelligence is another trait that I look for in others.  I do not know where I would rate myself on the scale of intelligence, but I know that I value the brains and want to spend time with these people. The intellect of the company you keep will determine how much you can gain from those interactions. Intelligence is one of the most attractive qualities I have seen in a woman. The ability to think, theorize, teach, and grow is the ultimate in individualism.

 Perhaps I hope it will rub off on me, but I know that intellect and intelligence are desirable.  There is something about a smart woman that makes my knees go weak.  I am not sure if intelligence is that way for everyone, but it is definitely for me.  There is always time for silliness in life, but also there is a time for serious discussion and thought. It is nice to have someone around who can share competently in both.

I could probably list many more traits like kind, caring, loving, punctual, accepting, tough, athletic, talented,  and that is without much thought. The fact of the matter is that there are many great people in the world, and they all have a unique set of traits that make them special, and I appreciate them all. But that still leaves the question for you:

What is the most desirable trait another person can possess?

One other trait must appreciate Dire Straits…

 

21

Thoughts

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Trapped by a thought!
Trapped by a thought!

How is it possible that a phrase can get stuck in your head? Like a song that you wish you could stop singing in your head. The phrase is there banging to the beat of its own honesty.  All you can do is think it over and over again until it inevitably expresses itself in words.

The phrase in my head I read in a glimpse, as I was watching a video on YouTube of all places. It was a  fantastic video, and the message was I Am, and who hasn’t contemplated what finite groups of messy things compile themselves to create their existence.  I do it all the time. So why did this phrase jump out at me? Why won’t it leave my head?

The phrase is: I am trapped in a brothel of clowns and loneliness.

Now on first observation, the fact that it mentions clowns will grab my attention because I really have an uncomfortable feeling around clowns.  They are just creepy to me, and they must be hiding something behind that mask of paint.  I, for one, do not want to know what it is. But, on the other hand, I don’t want them anyway around me.

 

Stupid Clowns Always Bothering Me!

Stay away from me clown!
Stay away from me, clown!

Clowns have bothered me since I was a child, and I went to the circus with my family. These clowns were wandering through the stands doing “clowny” things, joking with the people who laughed along, encouraging him.  I was a timid kid, and this clown started asking me questions, like where was I from, so he could yell,  “Anybody else here from your town.”  I had seen him do it and was absolutely petrified to talk to him, he kept picking on me, and I eventually gave up my town name. Afterward, the clown said, “There, was that so bad?”

In my mind, I answered, “Yes, it was.”  for these reasons.

-I was scared to tell him where I live because he might come to find me.

-I thought it was a waste of time because I came from a small town, and even at a circus, I would know if someone was there I knew.  

– I believe that clowns are like ghosts, wearing perpetual smiles that mask a desire to do great harm. These apparitions would appear from nowhere to haunt me.

That phobia by itself was enough to bring this phrase life of its own in the movie in my mind. But that was only a part of it.

Emptiness In the End

Good Question
Good Question

Now back to the phrase, it also describes the way I have felt about much of my life. Even though you don’t feel or look lonely on the surface when you look beneath, into the depths, there is a truth that reveals itself when you are honest.  All of these people around me everywhere, yet they are all just players.

As Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages.”

I have often wondered about how the play of my life would look, incredible highs, unbelievably devastating lows, some boring times you would gloss over, and I think the bulk of the show would be my incredible experiences with love.  I was in love three times in my life, encompassed years, and each I guard because should anyone know the depths I was willing to feel, they might only show me pity because each was irrevocably destroyed and disregarded. So all that is left is the empty spaces of the places they once possessed in your soul.

At the end of such things, there is a feeling of loneliness that can’t be compared to anything else, and although we are playing our part with others.  As you wait around in the bar of life waiting for that next love to come along, that feeling of emptiness subsists at least quietly in the background, like the music setting the mood.

So here I am thinking, “I am trapped in a brothel of clowns and emptiness.”  Reliving those emotions of what I was irrationally afraid of and having the realization once again that what is gone will never be replaced.

21

Duplicitous

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It has been an observation that all people are duplicitous, always have been, and always will be.  Some have more separation between their two sides, but we all have them.  This image of the apple makes me think of this.  Billy Joel expressed it very well,

“Well, we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out and
Show ourselves
When everyone has gone
Some are satin, and some are steel
Some are silk, and some are leather
They’re the faces of the stranger
But we love to try them on.”

What you show the world

I don’t think that anyone can argue with the premise because we don’t go around showing the world everything about ourselves. We show them what we want them to see or are comfortable with them seeing.  This apple is like that because you will see something undesirable if you look at the bottom, and it looks like it is no good.  However, if you look at the top, the apple still looks healthy and normal.  If the apple

hiding feelings
Be Careful What the World Sees

could choose to show you only its healthy-looking side; you would assume it was a normal and healthy apple without knowing the hidden damage underneath.  All people are this way to some degree.

Hide Your Damage

People hide their damage from the world for a couple of reasons.  First of all, nobody wants to be judged on the things that have happened and hurt them.  Nobody knows how much someone has been hurt or why. It seems a narrow thought process to label someone for one small part of their life.  Most often, judgments come from selfishness to point out someone else’s pain to hide our own. Or deflect attention from the very same issues in one’s own life.

masks
Are all outward appearances just carefully conceived masks?

Another reason people practice this separation is that if people knew their true feelings on things and issues, they would reject them, and they would lose acceptance in society.  This fear keeps many wearing their masks for their entire life, showing what they know will be accepted and hiding their different faces, regardless of the honesty behind them.

Why Be Shady?

It seems that people would be a lot happier if they could be who they are, think what they want, and be allowed to heal their damage. This is the way of the human condition, and we will continue to exist like the apple showing what we believe to be our shiny side to the world while we hurt underneath.

It makes you wonder if everything you see from people is just a mask or if they are trusting you enough to show you what they really think.  That is why people like dogs because you always know exactly where you stand with them. I have met people I thought I knew well, who proved over time to be hiding their true self behind a veil of lies and misinformation.  I can’t judge too harshly.

Keep To Yourself

How much of myself do I keep to myself? Just because I don’t want to put myself in front of the speeding train of judgment.  Much like all of our superheroes, Superman, Spiderman, Batman, and the like, they maintain a “secret” identity to protect a part of themselves.  I think it is to give them a safe space to live, outside of the public pressure of being Superman.  I think there is a bit of that in all of us.

Regardless of where you stand personally on the subject of duplicity, I will know that you, as well as everyone else, have a duplicitous identity. I guess the trick is to see which side of themselves any person is choosing to show you at any one time.

21

Now or Never

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If not now, then when?

if not now then when jonathan hilton
The question that can launch a thousand ships

 

There is often something that we have meant to do in life we continually put off until tomorrow because of the potential consequences. Perhaps we are too busy, or maybe we are afraid of the price we pay, to do this thing. The fact that there is change involved and change is a scary thing because nobody really can guarantee you that whatever you are looking to do will, in fact, make your life experience all that much better.

This fear is enough to stop many adventurous people from pursuing a new adventure, but should it? Isn’t the point of life to stretch ourselves and create all that we are capable of?  Or is it just a game of accumulation, the one with the most possessions at the end wins?

The short answer, I believe,  is life is about growth, because you can have everything in the world and not achieve happiness, you can know that you are producing something unique, in a voice that no one else has, be totally broke and still be happy.  So if you look to stretch yourself, you have to ask yourself, if not now, then when?

All Great Things

Most of the great things that man has ever accomplished were created by taking a chance and changing the status quo.  In fact, there is really no place in your life that you can look

changes jonathan hilton
All change can be scary

that life hadn’t changed radically from their existence even fifty years ago.

Socially there was still legal segregation in the United States, and it was considered bad by the establishment to listen to Elvis. What would they think of Jay-Z or Katy Perry or the fact that the current president of the US is African-American?

Now with Technology

This is what a phone should look like!
This is what a phone should look like!

Technologically we have gone from the television being a new thing, with three channels, to a massive entertainment source that you can watch on your phone.  Speaking of phones, if you had told me that I would have my own Star Trek communicator that I carried around with me all the time, I would never have believed it.

The phone was attached to the wall, and you had to be home to use it.  Our current phones would really be science fiction.  What if Steve Jobs had said, “Not today world, we don’t need a cool hand-held phone that talks to you.” We would be lost completely.

These things never existed and never would have existed if it wasn’t for the fact that someone thought, if not now, then when?

Are You Living in the Moment?

So when it comes to your personal life, if not now, when? When you look at your life, and you see or even more significantly feel that something needs to change, it can be difficult to take the plunge.

live-in-the-moment-for-the-sheer-joy-ofMaybe you are hoping that things will change on their own, or you will feel differently tomorrow.  However, if you are always looking to tomorrow for things to get better or improve, you may be missing out on something, a great opportunity for happiness today.

 

Putting off your own happiness is not a good thing because you were not put on the Earth to be miserable with life.  Saying I will start being happy when the kids are grown, or after the autumnal equinox or when my next birthday comes, or some other random event you are resigning yourself to wait for.

This is a prime example of not living in the moment because I have said many times. There is no guarantee that you will be around until the next autumnal equinox or even until tomorrow, for that matter.  Today is all that there is, and now is the only time you are sure to have.  If you wait, it may well be too late.  It is OK to be afraid; everyone is afraid, but those who find success learn to deal with the fear and move forward anyway.

There will come the point in your life when you have to cross your Rubicon and challenge what you need to challenge, change what you need to change, or create what you need to create.  Then and only then will you be in control of your life and your decisions.

So if not now, when?

21

Smiling

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  What makes you smile?    

Smiling is my favorite
Mine Too!

I have always felt that the endgame in life was to experience happiness, and one of the ways that we show this is to smile. Smiling shows an appreciation for whatever is unfolding in your life.

There are many different smiles we share with the world, and I am here telling you that there are so many things that make me smile. I am not sure that I can mention them all here. I am trying to encourage others to smile and feel a bit more positive about life.

Good Things Make Me Smile

You are a good thing that makes me smile.
You are a good thing that makes me smile.

This is a generic way to say that I encounter many good things daily in the course of my life. Some are natural and don’t involve other people at all.

 Like the way, a sunlit morning looks on the trees or reflects off the water and tells me that life is moving and happening all around.  One look at the sheer space that a big, blue sky has to offer, and a smile has to come to your face.

 Look at the configuration, and if there are clouds, you are looking at a configuration that has never existed before and never will again.  That is reality, and that makes me smile.

People provide a lot of good things to smile about as well. A friendly wave, comment, or “how ya doin’?” are enough reason to smile.

 In these transactions, I can tell you for sure that the more smiles you share, the more you will see on the faces of others. Good things, a warm and delicious meal, a perfect glass of iced tea, perfectly constructed mac and cheese, all will bring a smile to my face because they are all good things that warm your heart and make you feel good about being alive. 

Kindness Makes me Smile.

be with who makes you happyThere is nothing more important in bringing a smile to my face than kindness. It can be the act of being kind to someone else, or it can be the gift of receiving someone else’s kindness.

 Try it sometime. Do something kind for someone, with no regard for yourself and what you will receive, and you will find a smile appear uncontrollably on your lips.  It is the same when you are the beneficiary of kindness, and smiles are the natural result.

Often when I notice how unhappy some people are, I wonder when the last time a transaction of kindness had entered into their life.

 It must have been some time if they are that unhappy about life.  Perhaps we need to make kindness a mandatory activity in our society.  Who could be against that?  Thinking about making a law about kindness makes me smile, apparently.

Memories Make Me Smile

one thing each day that makes you smileI have memories that sometimes I like to recall, and they make me smile as I remember the people and events that have positively touched my life.

Some are funny; some are just goofy, some were serious, some involved love, some involve friends, and some involve family.  All the “good” and “bad” in all of these relationships and memories combine today to make me smile as I reach into the past with my mind.

One of the great gifts our imaginations give us is the ability to reach out and touch these things at the drop of a hat.  To be with that person you haven’t seen for over 25 years or go back to that place halfway across the country or even the world.

  There are happy memories of special times spent with special people recalled and bring a smile to your face. It could be as simple as the food from a Pizza Joint or a local diner.

The smile is for the experience. Even though it is long gone, the love for the moment and the other people in it nonetheless are worthy of a  smile.

“Good” Entertainment

Stewie makes me smile.
Stewie makes me smile.

This is a completely subjective thing because what I think is good, you may cringe at, but the fact remains that good entertainment makes me smile. This covers everything you do yourself, like reading books, enjoying the artwork of others, and all things in between.

 There are jokes, and there are quips. There is the sheer beauty of a mind that you can observe and appreciate.  Who hasn’t laughed out loud at a television program or the circumstances portrayed in the pages of a book?

If you have never laughed out loud or smiled uncontrollably due to the art around you, then you need to reevaluate your activities.  In the last week, I have smiled because of television shows, music, art, writing, and the Boston Red Sox, to name a few.  There seems always to be a reason to smile if you look for it.

Smile all the While

Whatever it is that makes you smile and share your happiness and good nature with others, you should really start to spend more time doing these things.

There is no shortage of faces in the world, seemingly angry and upset about everything.  Smile at them because there are few times in life that your smile won’t make someone else’s day a whole lot brighter.  So the only thing left to know is……………..

What makes you smile?

Look around you every day and see there are always things to smile about. Simple things from freedom of movement, choice of activity, time spent with special people, a perfect sky, a new shirt, an old shirt, love, something that matters, fun for the sake of it, a new adventure, a favorite activity, seeing someone be successful, experiencing something for the first time, appreciating it may be the last time, a great meal,  any of the things we shouldn’t take for granted. Whatever it is in your soul that makes you smile today, do it and share your smile with the world.

21

Creativity Experience

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New Experiences

change, growth, fearEach new experience with someone else changes us on a fundamental level. Sometimes I have difficulty being creative or thinking about what topics to write about.  In these difficult times, I remember fondly of the days when I could see a question, and quickly and easily organize my thoughts, and express my feelings about it.  I was in a flow and easily able to access it.  Such fun!

But sometimes, I follow the same format, and I struggle to form a sentence even to get the beginnings of thought down. Fortunately, there doesn’t have to be a long-stagnant stage in the process of creativity.  You can always do something to spark your creativity.  We are all in charge of this type of action and spirit in life.  Some will fret and worry that with billions of people globally, everything has been created already. But I think that thought process misses the point. Even though there are so many minds in the world, there is only one you! YOU are the only being on the face of this planet who can produce your thoughts, ideas, and view of the world. The things we can create belong to us alone. That is one of the things which makes life great.

Change and Growth Change Everything

I have gone through a great experience that has left an unmistakable and long-lasting mark on me, but sometimes I cannot seem to write as easily as I used to.  This has been a frightening thing to realize.  I have tried approximately a hundred times to start writing about the thoughts and views that I think are important. Still, after a promising first sentence or catchy paragraph, the ideas and creativity would vanish into the ether as if they never existed at all.  I have the drafts to prove it.  Many ideas were generated, developed, and lost. It does not feel good.

But the process of creativity at times is going to be a struggle. It may mean you are not true to yourself. Or perhaps you are trying to appeal to a particular audience or worrying about how you look rather than the creative process itself. Creativity is what it is, and the right audience will find and resonate with it.  Or maybe you are just trying too hard. Whatever the case, keep trying, relax, breathe. Let your creativity flow from within and enrich the world. In doing so, you enrich yourself.

You Aren’t That Person Anymore.

change-quotesWhen I was struggling, it dawned on me that one of the effects of experiencing new people and things in your life is that they change you fundamentally in almost all ways.  They don’t make you better or worse they make you different.  I know that it is called growth, and without the capacity to grow as individuals, we will wither and die, either literally or figuratively, or both.

Of course, the flip side of change is that a whole new level of thought and insight is at your disposal. Like coming to the end of a tunnel and busting through only to find a cache of rooms full of ideas never considered or understood, which impossible before. This is the doorway of creative passion and a realization of a whole new world at your disposal. Write about the things all the new people bring to you, and the lessons of the experiences.

My Past  Writing

Reading through my writing from the past few years, I can mark my development and growth as a road map to my thoughts and insights today.  It feels much like you do when you look at old pictures of yourself.  You remember the moments, and they are special, but that is not you anymore. You are now someone else. Each time you read a new thought and develop as a person, there are new layers of your thought and being exposed to the creative process.

inspirational_words_of_wisdom_quotesHere is to hoping that I can adjust to the new experiences I have and find the topics that will push my growth further along on my journey.  I am looking deep within to find the content that needs to be explored and the edges that need to be smoothed.  It should prove to be an interesting ride no matter what happens. Life always provides what is needed.

I say to all of those people I have met and worked with over the years, “Thanks a lot!”  Seriously, though, I would never have reached these thoughts and ideas without you and the inspiration you brought me by your good and/or bad behavior.

So What Do I Do Now?

I-begin-with-an-idea-300x297It seems clear to me that my writing in this space has to move from the theoretical and move toward being more descriptive about the experiences I have had in life.  That is a challenge but a good one to try.  Only time will tell if my insights are interesting enough to take a look at or not.  All I can say is that all are welcome on this journey, and I am always looking for the next person or situation to provide insight and creativity in any situation.  I am always looking for more knowledge to share and adventure to have. I have been fortunate to have great people in my life. They all have contributed to my thoughts and my pursuit of being a better person mentally, physically, and spiritually.  They have taught me how to treat others by their kindness and their cruelty. Put your creativity as a priority in your life and see what you can bring into the open space of existence.

 

 

 

21

No Regrets

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Today Is The Thing

4559365435_16203_gallery_xlargeLife is full of moments, each with its own individual fanfare and trumpets calls.  It is up to us to find the joy to embrace in each of these moments or notice the potential each day brings. Some live their life missing today because there is a constant focus completely on the past. Creating their identity out of the regrets about what happened yesterday, last year, or twenty years ago. Regret gives us a poor present to live today.  Most of what happened is a fantasy anyway. It is proven we don’t remember much of what happened accurately, only through our own perception of events.  Even if you are accurate in your recollections, can you change it? Even a little bit?

Today, this moment is all there is for you, and the more you branch out your attention from that, the less opportunity there is for enjoying the here and now. Keeping your focus on the task that you are working on will allow you to enjoy life.

All That You Do

In everything that you are doing, if it is worthwhile, you should be doing it well.  We should strive to complete everything that we undertake to the absolute best of our abilities.  There are times when our best may not be enough, but more often than not, it will regretbe.  I would only regret something today if I didn’t give it an honest effort and try. If something doesn’t work out how I think it should, then I have an opportunity to learn. It is in those lessons lives are defined, and new efforts can spring.

Regrets come from thinking about what might have been, so the only way I can regret what I am doing is if I could have done it any better.  If I spent time looking backward, I would miss the opportunities for success, enjoyment, and fun existing in this very moment I should be paying attention to.  But instead, I am regretting what I said to someone thirty years ago or how I shouldn’t have done something way back then.  This is a waste of time because you can’t change the past, and if you could have done better at that moment, you certainly would have.  Today I am trying to pay attention to what I am doing so that I won’t regret them later.

 I strive to be focused in all that I do and give my best effort to do it in the best manner I am capable of. Using the lessons I learned from the past and leaving the past where it belongs, far behind me.

To Be or Not to Be

fcd97ac86af9a9d2a31d9bcdc0971a3cThe question of whether our being or existence was worthwhile has been asked throughout time.  Some people have one bad experience taint everything else that comes in their life. It can happen when you are young and becomes the excuse for everything going wrong throughout life.  There is no need to have a childhood or an adult trauma define everything about your current life.  We all have obstacles or insecurities to deal with to see ourselves and our lives clearly.

 Once that trauma drama is overcome, and you see yourself for what you are, a creative, one of a kind, giant capable of doing just about anything, then you will not regret a moment. Each second is driving you toward your best self and what you are capable of.  Who is to say that the bad experience in your life wouldn’t end up being the catalyst for you to spring to greatness.  It is only an anchor if you keep yourself tied to it.  Never regret your being. I know I don’t, and neither should you!

Time to Have it All

What you have is really depending on how you look at life.  Do you regret that you don’t have regretown more possessions to stack up?  I don’t think the number of “things” you possess matters at all.  Although things may provide momentary pleasure, it is just a fleeting moment that passes as quickly as dusk slips into darkness.  Then to feel good, you need to have more stuff.  Stuff is not going to satisfy your soul or lead you to happiness. Only appreciating the moments of life and what they bring right now can do that.

The love of the people in your life will lead you to happiness in the giving and receiving that relationship. Of this substance, I am not sure that you can have too much.  Love is the kindness one shows to another when they are feeling down. Love is the acceptance of a person’s idiosyncrasies and to still claim them as your other half.  Love, caring, and kindness is attributes that make life enjoyable, and these feelings will last inside of you as long as you focus on them.  When the smell of a new car or the shine of the latest technological gadget has long faded, those you love and the feelings of joy will remain with you.

You may be able to trick yourself for a season or two into thinking that stuff will make you happy, but in the end, the emptiness that is inside you can only be filled by the love of people, and it starts by loving yourself. NoRegrets happen when you combine your thoughts of the past with your perceptions of their outcomes.  It would help if you tried something else.  If you only would have gone sooner.  I should have known what would happen.  All of these regretful thoughts do nothing to change the past. They only muddy up the waters of today, making tomorrow more difficult to get to.  Leave regrets in the past, enjoy today, and hope for the best tomorrow possible.

I Regret nothing. I learn, and I live.

“We all do things we desperately wish we could undo. Those regrets just become part of who we are, along with everything else. To spend time trying to change that, well, it’s like chasing clouds.” – Libba Bray.

“We don’t have to be defined by the things we did or didn’t do in our past. Some people allow themselves to be controlled by regret. Maybe it’s a regret, and maybe it’s not. It’s merely something that happened. Get over it.” – Pittacus Lore.

“If only. Those must be the two saddest words in the world.” – Mercedes Lackey.

 “Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can’t build on it; it’s only good for wallowing in.” – Katherine Mansfield.

“The only things I regret, and the only things I’ll ever regret, are things I didn’t do. In the end, that’s what we mourn. The paths we didn’t take. The people we didn’t touch.” – Scott Spencer

 “Don’t live your life regretting yesterday. Live your life so tomorrow you won’t regret today.” – Catherine Pulsifer.

I made mistakes but held on to my faith……….No Regrets, No Regrets!!

 

Gratitude

Friendship Thing

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grateful for friendship
I have known this guy for over forty years and he still makes me laugh by ignoring signs and being funny. (he is trespassing)

It should not be difficult to look at one’s friends and to feel an overwhelming gratitude.  For me, that is certainly the case.  Friendship isn’t a relationship that you can buy or force anyone to participate in, it is a connection over a shared experience that binds you to that other person in a positive way.   I think that the right positive friendships in life can enhance your life.  At this point, I have come to realize that all friends are not created equal, but all friendships are a valuable thing, and here are my thoughts on why.

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Life is too short to go without laughter, and a good friend can usually bring about a laughing fit about almost anything.  It doesn’t matter how long you have been friends, looking at life in a humorous way is going to allow your friendship to grow.   I have always been drawn toward the people who can snicker at the day to day events we are faced with.  If you can’t laugh about it then you are probably going to be spending a lot of time crying.  Think about your friends and how many have been centered around laughter.  I am having a hard time thinking of one person that I have enjoyed spending time with that didn’t involve laughter and joking of some kind.   I am sure it is possible to be friends if you don’t laugh but it would seem to me a much more dour prospect.

Think about your friends and how many have been centered around laughter.  I am having a hard time thinking of one person that I have enjoyed spending time with that didn’t involve laughter and joking of some kind.   I am sure it is possible to be friends if you don’t laugh but it would seem to me a much more dour prospect.

Old Friends, Always Friends

grateful for friends
All friends are valuable and don’t need to be labeled.

I was blessed to grow up in a small town in Maine, where I went to school with the same group of kids until the seventh grade.  The neat thing about these people, is that now almost forty years later when I run into one of these people, the time that has passed does not matter at all.

With some, it is as if no time has passed at all, the conversation is a bit different but the relationship is still the same as it was back in the old days.  The shared experience of growing up like that apparently builds a bond that isn’t easily broken or forgotten.

 I am grateful for these relationships because no matter what is happening in my life, those people know who you are and always accept you the way you are.  I am grateful for these connections.

Some Come and Go and That is OK

In life, I think friendship is often like the tide, inevitably moving in and out.  It has become a belief of mine, that people enter your life for a reason, most often to teach you something.  Friendship is no different.

Maybe it is how to do something or how you look at things, but the more you allow people into your lives the greater your personal growth is.  Unfortunately once the lesson is learned, these people often move out of your life.

This is OK because you will have to grow, be open to new experiences and new lessons that friends yet unmet will teach you.  The value of the old friends is not lessened by the fact that you have to move on for now.  You can keep in touch and when you see each other later in life, you will always have that shared experience.

Since new friends are a great path to growth, you always have to be willing to greet and make new friends, which can be difficult.   My advice is to take them wherever you can get them from.  I have learned much more from the friends I have made over the past year than they could ever imagine.

Toxic Friends

Not everything in friendship is a bowl of cherries.  Sometimes, there are people you are drawn to who initially are great, but after awhile you realize that all they do is talk about other people in a derogatory manner.   Sometimes it is as blatant as making a comment as soon as someone is out of earshot.

If they are doing this, what do they say when you are out of earshot?   Probably nothing good.  I am grateful that I haven’t had to deal with too many of these, but the ones I did have to deal with, taught me a lot.

I think there are only two choices here, change the dynamic of the friendship or move away from it.  The people that you choose to spend your time with will not only define you to the world but will impact how you feel and how you react in it.

Changing the dynamic is nearly impossible but give it a try.  When something negative is said about somebody, immediately say something nice about them.  I have done this twice and in both cases, the person found reasons not to discuss other people with me again.    Life is too short for negative thoughts and feelings, I am grateful to keep most negativity out of my life.

Thank You Friends

Friendship is one of the most important factors that makes this human experience worthwhile.  There is something about sharing, thoughts, ideas, laughs or good times that is bonding to all of us.   The educational experience, the work experience, the life experience, all of them are grounds for bonding through friendship and through friendship we are able to grow exponentially further than we could by ourselves.  Isn’t that the basis for blogging?  Putting your ideas out there and seeing if there are like minded people who can appreciate what you are thinking, feeling or doing?

Personally I am grateful for all of the friends that have entered my life, either for a season or a lifetime and I look forward to meeting those that come into my life in the future.  Friends are the measuring stick of Your reality.

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