Tag Archives: Difficult Times

There’s A Light

When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

light in the darkness jonathan hilton
Are Your Ideas In the Darkness?

There are times in everyone’s life when they feel like they are all by themselves, with only their beliefs to guide them.  These times are opportunities to define your life, what your principles are, and how you will share this with the world. Will you continue to think as you always have? Or will you move in the direction of change and growth? That is a test that life likes to give us from time to time, and we must find the lesson and maintain our humanity and compassion in the process. There is no question difficult times are tough to endure but they bring with them an opportunity.  One way or another these moments will come to define your life, providing you with depth in the way you view life and your place in it.  You will have the chance to become more understanding of the plight of others in the world or you can build bitterness around your own situation.  The decision is truly yours. What light do you bring into the world?  One of illumination or destruction?

The Dark Side

walking into the darkness
Fear-based thought will lead you to the darkness.

When difficult times arrive, you may forget the soft glow of the idea you strongly believe in, you can lose your positive attitude. This experience can cause disillusion, anger, hatred, and, most of all, self-pity. Why is everyone against me? If they were real friends, they would support me no matter what. Poor me! These are natural emotions and thoughts, but that is all that they are.  We are not our thoughts or emotions. In this case, they are all caused by the actions and opinions of others.  The danger is that once you start down the path of self-pity and anger, you are in danger of staying there for a long time, if not forever.

All of these are fear-based emotions and thoughts, which can have no other destination than to make you unhappy, angry, and scared.  There is no way that you can embrace the good in something and grow if you spend all of your time, though, and effort in self-pity and anger. These emotions can become pervasive in all aspects of your life, and relationships end; you will find that you look at everything with a veil of suspicion, and it will become nearly impossible to be truly happy.  This change can be caused by any tragedy in your life, losing a job, character assassinations, the death of a loved one, or any of the significant obstacles of life.  Fortunately, this is not permanent or fatal unless you want it to be.

The Light

When you carry the light of an idea into the darkness, you will always have a choice, for

walking in the light
Thoughts and actions based on love will bring you to light no matter where you are

every adverse reaction above, there is a positive choice available to you.  This choice is the path of growth because these decisions come from love.  Compassion, understanding, kindness, and forgiveness are all examples of this type of reaction.  It is pretty easy to display these characteristics when times are good and everything is going your way, but quite a different story when facing challenges.  You get laid off from your job unexpectedly, how do you react? It would be understandable if you were angry and felt it was unfair and wished terrible things on all of those responsible, but what will that accomplish when you look at it?

You will allow the things that happened to you to define you and all of your actions.  Or you can accept that it happened and look for the positive. This optimism may be the push you needed to finally follow your dream and become a doctor or an engineer or whatever you have always wanted to do.  Difficult times and opportunities often walk hand in hand if you keep your eyes open.  Forgive those that you feel wronged you, accept what has happened, and move forward with courage. I can’t tell you for sure, but open your eyes and embrace the changes, and you may find yourself significantly happier than when you began this journey.

So if you feel like you are marching into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believe in, make that idea one that honors you and leads to a more significant light in the world. If it creates love, it will do that. If it starts with fear, it will most likely lead to misery and pain. Look for the light in the situations you face, and even the worst things can ultimately positively impact you and the world.  There is no way to change the past and what has happened. You have one hundred percent control over how you react to them.

Into the light

 

Rhythm of Life

Law of Rhythm- All things have a rhythm, a cycle, or an ebb and flow. 

There is a rhythm in all aspects of our life.  It is in everything from our daily routines to the natural world all around us. Things work in cycles, sometimes the flow is intense like a thunderstorm and others the flow is smooth and easy like a gently flowing stream. But all of your experience is moving as a part of a larger mix of the world.  Calendars, astrological movement, tides, and seasons are all easy to see examples of how rhythm affects your life.  Learning to dance with the tempo is going to determine if you are enjoying the ebb and flow of your life. Understanding that your life is a cycle itself can provide meaning and direction for you in your daily activities.

The Unsteady March of Creation and Destruction

In hindsight, looking at anything it is easy to see whatever it is as a fluid creation of yourself or life in general. But when all things have closely evaluated the ebb and flow of its creation are quickly revealed. All things have periods of intensity followed by those of easy creation.  Like the heating of iron to create steel, there are times of intense heat and those of significant cooling in order to create the perfect final product. Rhythm is the creative tempo of life.  In the life cycle of all things, there are times of creation, destruction, and preservation.  Each interacting with others to make or break all of the experiences we have in life.

The value here is to look for the rhythms in your life and see the tempo with which things are moving.  Jobs will come with an excitement of something new and leave as a mind-numbing obligation. The situation was the same but the rhythm of perception changes as you grow, and move to your own music. Look for the rhythm of your relationships and see how they ebb and flow.  People come into your life like they are arriving on the tide. They leave their influence and then are whisked away back out of your life.  Were they even really there?  This is important because as the song of life moves along you have to make room for new notes to appear and guide the rhythm where it is supposed to go.  Creation, destruction, perseverance only happen in a balance with the music of your life.

Natures Examples Observed

Look at the moon and how it works in a complete cycle, sometimes pulling the tides in and others pulling them out. This natural rhythm can be observed, documented, predicted and used to understand how our oceans work.  You can know what time low or high tide will occur on any date in the future with a simple observation and calculation.  The seasons work the same way, we know when the spring and fall equinox will occur as well as the summer and winter solstice.  If the rhythm of the seasons in our lives that allows us the chance to see how it works in other areas of our lives.

Farmers have been able to use the cycles of nature to predict behavior for many generations.  This information is used to decide when to plant or harvest crops.  Plants and trees develop and decompose based on the season. Animals also adjust to the rhythm of life as some migrate to warmer areas during winter.  All of this shows that you can adjust to the season which is upon you and thrive, just by being aware of what is happening to you.

The Pendulum

We see this come true in all aspects of our lives, from politics to business. Whenever something swings one way, right or left, it must eventually swing back the other way. Economies are continually moving this way as people go from stretches of spending confidence to periods of thrift, fear and holding back.  Each swing brings an experience for people in all economic brackets.  It makes sense then to not let any of the cycles we encounter in life make us too high or too low.  Maintaining an even keel through all the swings of the pendulum seems to be the healthiest mindset we can have.

By not letting the extremes of the pendulum effect you in a wild way, you are able to achieve peace and pursue your dreams. Calmness has a majesty about it which allows cool heads to prevail in difficult circumstances.  Learning to dance through the difficult times allows you insight, and wisdom about preparing when the good times come back again.  We can benefit from this philosophy in any area of our lives. Look for the patterns of it where you are so that you can predict where you are going.

“In the universe, in life, and in all things there is a season. A time for all things.”

 

French Fries and a Chocolate Shake

by Jonathan Hilton

ffandshakeI can remember that day very clearly. I was sitting at the restaurant with french fries and a chocolate shake on the table in front of me, talking with my grandparents about my upcoming graduation from high school.

The reason I recall this day is not because of anything that was said, it was the feeling I had of becoming an adult and that my grandparents approved of the young man I was turning into and that made me feel good.

How did I know they approved? I suppose I didn’t for sure at that moment, but there are many other forms of communication that can’t be ignored.

His Name Was Leslie

My grandfather’s name was Leslie, I always thought how tough life must have been with

This is Leslie, I love this picture it shows his sense of humor, which I have inherited I think.
This is Leslie, I love this picture it shows his sense of humor, which I have inherited I think.

that name, but he did not give two shakes what anyone else thought about him.  It was one of the things that I was often embarrassed by as a kid and one of the things I remember most fondly today.

Thoughts of Leslie came up today, I was thinking about how do you know if someone you love who has passed away would be proud of you today? Leslie died in 1993 from complications from heart surgery.  It was unexpected, it was supposed to be a routine surgery, but there is nothing routine about any procedure as we found out.

I Never said Good bye

People of that generation were serious, they didn't express emotions much, it wasn't a proper thing to do. Leslie was great anyway!!
People of that generation were serious, they didn’t express emotions much, it wasn’t a proper thing to do. Leslie was great anyway!!

I never got a chance to say good-bye in person, and I have no idea how he really felt about me then. He was from a generation that didn’t talk about their emotions very much. You just had to kind of figure it out.  There were signs, but you had to look to see them.

Wondering now as I move along in life, I have faced difficult times. I have made mistakes. I have been far from perfect. I accept that, and I wonder often if Leslie and I could sit down and have a conversation today, what would he say?

I would ask, “Grandfather are you proud of me? Knowing all that I have done and been through.  I imagine the response goes something like this.

“I have always been proud of you, because you are the only one who can be who you are. You never saw my challenges and the struggles I had with my parents and finding my place in the world. I am not sure how I would have done in your shoes. I do know that where you are now, only you could get there, and I can’t wait to see what is going to happen in the future. I love you.”  I don’t remember him ever saying that to me in my life, but in my heart I just know he did. Why else would he do so many fantastic things for me?

Gone but Never Forgotten

That conversation is what I imagine and it affects me almost like it were real and not the whispering of a ghost.  In the end I guess it doesn’t matter, because I have to realize that I am a good person, I wouldn’t steal from you for any reason. I won’t lie if I can help it, (how does my hair look? If it looks bad, I don’t want to hurt feelings.) I would try to help anyone who needs it. In fact, when I look at the things like that I realize,

I am just like Leslie, and that makes me realize that even though he is no longer here, he lives inside of me and I owe it to him and all of my family to be the best human being I can be, including being proud of who I am and what I have become.

That is why I have no choice, when I eat an order of fries and a chocolate shake but to remember Leslie.  I smile and feel happy for who I am.