Tag Archives: be authentic

Looking for You

Do you Let Your True Self Shine?

Do You Know?
Do You Know?

I have had to pause to ask myself about my path quite often. What makes each of us unique? Let me tell you what I think. Each of us is born with unique talent or skill that is ours alone. It is given to us at birth, and we need only to follow it to find our purpose in life.

Life isn’t ever that easy, though. From the moment we come into the world, we are met with limits and expectations from others.

Sometimes the limits come from a place of love, like a parent guiding their child safely, and sometimes they come from a much darker experience.

It matters little where the limits come from, and they cause us to be ashamed of who we are and what talent we have.

These “would have’s” and “should have’s” of life make you shy away from your true self, pretending to be something more acceptable. Some who experience abuse early on in life never really get to see their authentic self, making it much harder to find.

Looking For Me

Are You Looking For Me?
Are You Looking For Me?

I have been hot on the trail of my authentic self for much of the past two years. It has been a slow and sometimes scary chase. It all began almost two years ago.

When I realized that I didn’t know anything about life, I was not happy, and like many people hadn’t been happy in a long time.

There had been moments of extreme happiness, and I enjoyed people, but the inner feeling of joy escaped me. I had resigned myself to think that this was how you felt in life, empty and bored.

I was waiting for the clock to run out. However, life had other thoughts, and events reminded me that I wasn’t always this way.

Dreams were a vital part of my youth. My imagination guided me in almost every adventure I had every day, and I dreamed of everything from playing for the Red Sox to racing horses.

I believed that everything that I thought of could happen, and it was just a matter of getting a little older for me to do all of those things. That person was my authentic self, the true me. I was gifted with the ability to dream vividly, and it seemed life was determined to make me forget that.

The Cover-Up

cover upOver the years, the feelings of trying to fit in, not rock the boat, and be “normal” made those thoughts move from the front to the back of my mind.

Finally, they were forgotten, neglected, and abandoned as I got older. I was an adult, and there was no place for dreaming in adulthood.

It was like knowing a secret that you couldn’t remember, but you knew it was a good thing, and if you could connect with it, then all would be well.

Life, however, moves in, and the job, the relationships, and the expectations all jump on top of you and push that authentic identity far back into your memory and may never let it out. Like you are asleep and can’t wake up.

Waking Up

wake upI am not unique because I think others have gone through some traumatic events and are shocked by the malaise of life.

I started to remember it piece by piece, and it is still coming back to me. Like waking from a slumber, you begin to experience life differently.

Each of us is born with an authentic self with abilities meant for us alone. Some people are right to them their whole lives, and others never see their authentic selves again.

Most people spend their early life forgetting and the second part of their life trying to remember. It doesn’t matter who you are or what age you are; there is a unique person inside you that is a mere alarm clock ringing from waking up.

Do you know your authentic self?

“Authenticity starts in the heart.” Brian D’Angelo

“Authenticity over everything.” Anonymous

“If you’re your authentic self, you have no competition.” Anonymous

“Don’t trade your authenticity for approval.” Anonymous

“Honesty and authenticity are a big deal for me.” Scarlett Thomas

“Authenticity: The courage to be yourself.” Anonymous

“Be fearlessly authentic.” Anonymous

“Authenticity is magnetic.” Anonymous

 

Authentic

real meHow much of your time is spent being an authentic you? How much is spent acting like you feel our culture determines you to be?   How is that identity even established? What difference does it make?  So much of our time is spent developing this persona, which, when examined closely, isn’t very real at all.  We create this imposter ourselves by trying to fit into the roles our culture demands.  Go to college, get married, have a career for thirty years, retire and wait to die.  If it isn’t time to let go of that false now, then it never will be.

False Self

Each day there is an image of myself that I imagine the world sees.  What precisely the idea entails is a mystery. I certainly hope that intelligence, kindness, and caring are a part of the picture.  It is not the substance that concerns me, and it is the inability to ask for help or even appear vulnerable that is bothersome. There are times when people get lost, down, and dangerously sad, but still put on a convincing smile and hide the pain and suffering you are feeling.

The pain and suffering are what they are. Each person has found their own story of this anguish. Although nobody would call pain and suffering good companions,  they can supply a sufficient education and help develop a depth of character that didn’t exist before. Kindness is no longer a word but an action. Understanding someone’s actions comes far before judgment because of my education in this area. Recognizing the false self isn’t who you are but who you think you should be to fit in.  Put all the thoughts of others aside and start to listen to your intuition about what will make you happy.

I Let It Go

letting go 2It has become time for me to let go of what others think and what I feel about myself because of the fear that others might contemplate my choices, decisions, and thoughts. For the first time in my life, I have to embrace who I am, faults and shortcomings included.

I feel that only by doing this can I move forward, away from the falseness of the past and toward a future that includes an honest reckoning of what I want to accomplish in life.  Time to let go of the expectations that I feel others have built up in my life, embracing the contribution that I can make that matters is only as myself. Not a prefabricated idea of a person that is only an illusion of living.

The True X Marks the Spot

In all of the greatest stories about treasure, there is

What treasure is located at your X?
What glory is located at your X?

Always a map, and at the location of the great treasure, there is a giant X.  There are many twists and turns on the path to get to this place, and often danger exists. I think that my true self is a lot like that. There is a valuable treasure of gold if you can reach the X, but getting there has been a tough road, sometimes fraught with danger and difficulty.  Inside there were more profound struggles than anyone on the outside could know.  I feel like slowly, but surely the X is coming into view for me.

Have you found yours?

Original

authentic selfBeing a true original is difficult to do today. The media inundates all people with numerous messages of what we should aspire to be, what clothes are acceptable to fit our persona, what beverage to drink, and even which medications we should take to alleviate any minor problem.  You have to wonder if there is room for a person to be a total original. Then you meet or see one, and you know it exists, which means the authentic self exists in you. Blaze your path and leave a trail for others to follow.  Too many people worry about what others think of what they do. Just do what your heart tells you.  If you are experiencing fulfillment in the process, then that is all that matters. Let’s strive to make each of us the person we were born to be.

Show Your Unique Abilities

authentic selfWe live in a world that is full of contradictions. People have the drive to be unique but live in a hell-bent society to make sure we are never expressing this. So what can you do to show your unique abilities? One of the first things is to try not to imitate others consciously. Do your own thing. I struggle with this constantly because I see many great writing ideas and some I try to emulate, to see how they fit, but that only lasts for a little while. I have to be me and express my thoughts how I see them and, more importantly, feel them.  Each thing I write comes from the creation of my mind. Others’ ideas influence me in the many things I read, listen to, and grow from. I try to express my thoughts on all of these things in my words.  Words seem to be an outdated form of communication sometimes, but they are the method I have.

Your uniqueness will shine through the minute you start to think for yourself and do what your heart tells you.  If you want to create art, then create the art your soul is craving to express.  Some people I know with great talent are much too wrapped up in seeking an audience and creating things to do that rather than create what you have the capacity and will to do and let the audience create itself. I would rather die an original than live my life as a copy.

Don’t Waste Your Effort.

So many of us spend so much of our energy to make sure that we present a story of who we are to the world that we want them to see that we have no clue who we really are. It takes a lot of energy to do this, to wear the mask of perfection or whatever you want the world to see. When so much of yourself is spent keeping people from seeing who you are, obviously, you will not be your authentic self, and the only trail authentic selfyou will leave is one of anger, frustration, and personal disappointment.

Throw this out and focus on being you, regardless of what you think the world wants you to be.  You may not even remember who you actually are because you have been playing a part so long. Move off the path that others desire for you and move forward down the path of your true self. Your authentic self already knows the answers, it was a person you were born to be, and you were this person before society, and time reprogrammed you to think who you were was wrong.  Now we spend our remaining years seeking to find our purpose, and it is always to get back to that authentic individual. Some will make it, and some will never look. That is the choice of life. Choose to be your authentic self, and the world needs more of this.

Leave a Trail

Too many times, people do what others think they should. Rather than blazing their own trail, even in a small way, they spend their time looking over their shoulder for the approval of others.  We see this in the presentation of social media posts. People seem to be looking for ways to present themselves as they want to be seen rather than as they truly are.  Hiding their authentic self behind a facade of self-propagated propaganda.

Please don’t follow the crowd, and they don’t know what is good for you as a person. Only you can know what choices will feel good to you. Only you can determine your path because when it is all done, you will be held responsible for your life and who you are, not the crowd.  Be your best self and leave a bright, brave trail for others to follow.  You are the only one who can do this, don’t let yourself down.

Do Not Go Where the Path May Lead, Go Instead Where There Is No Path and Leave a Trail – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Through it all, I stood tall and did it my way.” – Frank Sinatra.