Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
by Jonathan Hilton Day 55
The initial reaction that anyone would have for this question is that, of course they are making the decisions for themselves and are therefore in control of their own destiny and actions.
That was my initial reaction, but as I considered it more I guess you have to break it down into the type of decisions that are being made.
Then you can collect a clearer answer because all decisions are not equal.
Decisions We Make
In the course of every day we have the need to make thousands of decisions, some are big and we focus on them a lot, some are small and we pay no attention to them at all.
I think the biggest decisions we make are about your reaction to the events of your life. Someone cuts you off while you are driving, do you experience road rage, and carry an anger towards them even though there is no way you could know their intent, or do you face that situation with understanding.
This is a choice, similar to many choices we make every day about the way we feel and the way we look at the world. In this case are you making the choice how to feel, or are you letting a stranger in a car, who can’t drive, make that decision for you?
You make many of these decisions every day, making decisions about dealing with people from all walks of life. There are people who do a lot of stupid things, but don’t let them control how you live your life.
The Small stuff
There are tons of little decisions that you never even give a second thought to, like: What to wear today. Coffee at Dunkin’ Donuts or Starbucks. Stop or go, stand or sit, walk or run, sit or stand, talk or be silent.
These happen continuously, and for these sometimes it is left up to others, and I don’t have a need to control everything so many of the coffee decisions in life I will leave to whoever I am with, because I really don’t care and if going to Starbucks makes someone else happy then it makes me happy too.
These decisions are not going to determine much in the scope of your life, and should be managed as expeditiously as possible; otherwise you will never get anything done.
The Big Decisions We Make Every Day
There are many decisions that we make every day which make up a bigger part of our lives
and go a long way in determining our view about the world and how we fit into it.
There are many situations every day that contribute to this feeling and I think these are the ones we make for ourselves whether we realize it or not.
The interactions you choose to have with other people are in this category. If a person makes a choice to do something that is annoying, perplexing, confusing or antagonizing to you, the decision of how you respond internally is completely yours.
You decide to respond with anger, frustration, hate, or you choose to respond with understanding, tenderness, assistance, that decision is always up to you.
I think that the decisions we make about people every day are the most important decisions because they define us at our core.
You can choose in many cases what face the world will see and in many cases judge you by, but when these decisions are observed there is no mask that can hide your intent.
I can’t tell you that your decisions in this area are right or wrong for you, but there is no debating that the decisions you make will define you, and that is a fact.
So to me I know that there are many decisions that I don’t make, and don’t care to make, but when it comes to the big decisions in life, I will make them all, because I will not be defined by the thoughts or actions of somebody else, I have to live with who I am, and that is far too valuable a proposition to leave to the decisions of others.