Decisions, Decisions

Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?

decisions or choices we make
This is true about everything.

by Jonathan Hilton Day 55

The initial reaction that anyone would have for this question is that, of course they are making the decisions for themselves and are therefore in control of their own destiny and actions.

That was my initial reaction, but as I considered it more I guess you have to break it down into the type of decisions that are being made.

Then you can collect a clearer answer because all decisions are not equal.

Decisions We Make

In the course of every day we have the need to make thousands of decisions, some are big and we focus on them a lot, some are small and we pay no attention to them at all.

I think the biggest decisions we make are about your reaction to the events of your life. Someone cuts you off while you are driving, do you experience road rage, and carry an anger towards them even though there is no way you could know their intent, or do you face that situation with understanding.

This is a choice, similar to many choices we make every day about the way we feel and the way we look at the world. In this case are you making the choice how to feel, or are you letting a stranger in a car, who can’t drive, make that decision for you?

You make many of these decisions every day, making decisions about dealing with people from all walks of life. There are people who do a lot of stupid things, but don’t let them control how you live your life.

The Small stuff

Eleanor Roosevelt Quote
Your negative decisions today will affect you tomorrow.

There are tons of little decisions that you never even give a second thought to, like: What to wear today.  Coffee at Dunkin’ Donuts or Starbucks. Stop or go, stand or sit, walk or run, sit or stand, talk or be silent.

These happen continuously, and for these sometimes it is left up to others, and I don’t have a need to control everything so many of the coffee decisions in life I will leave to whoever I am with, because I really don’t care and if going to Starbucks makes someone else happy then it makes me happy too.

These decisions are not going to determine much in the scope of your life, and should be managed as expeditiously as possible; otherwise you will never get anything done.

The Big Decisions We Make Every Day

There are many decisions that we make every day which make up a bigger part of our lives

you decide sign
It is always your decision, whether you let someone else choose for you or not, still your decision.

and go a long way in determining our view about the world and how we fit into it.

There are many situations every day that contribute to this feeling and I think these are the ones we make for ourselves whether we realize it or not.

The interactions you choose to have with other people are in this category. If a person makes a choice to do something that is annoying, perplexing, confusing or antagonizing to you, the decision of how you respond internally  is completely yours.

You decide to respond with anger, frustration, hate, or you choose to respond with understanding, tenderness, assistance, that decision is always up to you.

I think that the decisions we make about people every day are the most important decisions because they define us at our core.

You can choose in many cases what face the world will see and in many cases judge you by, but when these decisions are observed there is no mask that can hide your intent.

I can’t tell you that your decisions in this area are right or wrong for you, but there is no debating that the decisions you make will define you, and that is a fact.
So to me I know that there are many decisions that I don’t make, and don’t care to make, but when it comes to the big decisions in life, I will make them all, because I will not be defined by the thoughts or actions of somebody else, I have to live with who I am, and that is far too valuable a proposition to leave to the decisions of others.

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12 thoughts on “Decisions, Decisions”

  1. Amazing post! Your highlighted part right up there…couldn’t have said it better. Until I was in early 20s, my parents made most of my decisions, if not, they heavily influenced how I thought, especially my father. Especially when it came to choosing the path for my future. I don’t know when it happened, but eventually I realized that my happiness and what I want to do is more important so now I seek advice when I need, but I make decisions and stick with them and defend them when I need to because no one is living this life other than me. I need to live with those choices for the rest of my life. :)
    Yikes…excuse my word vomit Jon! Love your writing so much..so inspiring :)

    1. Thank you Kim, you seem to be doing just fine, and making great decisions in your life.:-) Thank you for all the kind words you said, it really made my day. You can write as much as you like in the comments to my posts because they are always awesome and pick me up. Thank you again Kim you are a superstar, making your own decisions, because you are doing great.

  2. “I think that the decisions we make about people every day are the most important decisions because they define us at our core.” Completely agree with this. Well said, JD.

  3. Another thought-provoking post, Jon. I don’t think we often consider just how many decisions we make in the average day. Making choices is so engrained in our daily routine that it becomes second nature to us, but taking the time to really consider why we make the decisions we do is important.

  4. To quote Dr. Seuss: “Be who you are and say what you fee because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind”

    As usual an uplifting post. Thanks for reminding us to stay true to ourselves. Love, love, love the highlighted part!

    1. I love the highlighted part as well. Thank you my friend for all the support and the great “bacon” comments, I love them. Thank you so much for the great happy comment. :-)

  5. I completely agree. How we respond to the world we live in is a choice and dictates what happens moment to moment, day to day, week to week etc. And people will certainly define you if you let them. Is it your belief that we make our own luck and create our own experiences? I recently had a discussion with a friend about the concept of good luck vs. bad luck. I once believed that we create our own respective “stories” but my opinion has changed over time. There are situations, circumstances and conditions in life that we have no control of what so ever that greatly inhibit or limit our decisions and options. I’m interested in your take on this.

    1. Great questions Maggie, I do not think we make our own luck, per say. It seems to me that things do happen to us that might be the best for us in the long run if we can take the time to see it. I used to think that we create our own luck, but what is luck but just the way any event is perceived. That perception can change as time moves you away from the event. Like for example, you feel lucky you got that job you thought you really wanted, but after a year, you realize that the job is a mind numbing, soul sucking experience. Not so lucky then. There are things we have no control over and that is a part of what makes life the exciting journey it is, we can’t control everything. I think our reaction to everything is all we can hope to control. Great thoughts for a Thursday morning. :-)

Let me know your thoughts.